101 Rules For Nu-metal

These are the latest set of rules needed to start your own nu-metal band. There is a lot of truth in rules #7 #66 #78 #98 and of course #101. Be your own judge.

01. When asked who your musical influences are, say Black Sabbath -- always Black Sabbath.
02. Make sure you don't sound like Black Sabbath at all even though you said that they're your musical influences.
03. Make fun of popular music especially Britney Spears and any boyband. This is non-negotiable.
04. When conducting interviews always say the words "@#%$", "fag", and "@#%$".
05. Accept interviews only from the following music magazines: Metal Edge, Revolver, Alternative Press, Hit Parader, Guitar World, Kerrang! and Rolling Stone.
06. Pay them $50 to mention the word "metal" in correlation with your music, in every single interview.
07. Add another $50 if they are able to invent a new genre dedicated solely to your band -- ie. Death Metal Disco (Static X), Melodic-core (Thursday), Christian Rap Metal (POD).
08. Make sure that at least one of your band members have an existing side project, or at least planning to start one.
09. Ask your mom to go to the nearest "Ross" beauty shop to buy six boxes of Lander hair gel.
10. Use the word "gay" when referring to anything you don't like.
11. No guitar solos.
12. Your drumming techniques must consist of "bass-snare, bass-snare" drumming only.
13. In order for your bassist to win a "Best Bass Player Award", make sure that they:
14. Are female or,
15. Use the "slap and pop" playing style.
16. Jump in the air while playing your guitar, and while in mid-air place the guitar on your side.
17. During concerts, ask your audience to sing along:
18. Jump up and down,
19. Put their hands in the air,
20. Flash their middle-fingers,
21. And be careful not to hurt each other.
22. In the liner notes of your album, dedicate it to your parents, and to more than 15 different nu-metal bands with at least 4 bands which you borrowed your sound from.
23. Your second album must be weaker than the first one.
24. Make sure that at least one band member:
25. Has been previously arrested,
26. Drinks beer,
27. Or smokes marijuana.
28. During interviews deny any form of drug-use in your band.
29. Say you hate Limp Bizkit, then contradict your statement by sticking up for bands like Taproot, Drowning Pool, and Primer 55.
30. When describing bands which you think are good, end every statement with "kicks ass".
31. When describing bands you hate, end every statement with either "sucks dick", or "@#%$ sucks ass".
32. Pretend that you've been abused as a child and when no one believes you, hold:
32. Your depressing song lyrics as evidence, and if that doesn't work,
33. Donate 3% of your earnings to anti-child abuse foundations.
34. Your record label must be either one of the following (and their subsidiaries): Sony, Interscope, Warner, Geffen, Virgin, Roadrunner, and Island/Def Jam.
35. Wear baseball caps, shades, wallet-chains, or any other fancy-schmancy fashion accessory everytime.
36. Your pants must be 3 times larger than your original waist length.
37. Say "shaznit".
38. Say "tight as @#%$" whenever possible.
39. Pretend that you hate MTV, and say that you detest the playing of your videos without your consent -- but deep down inside you really like the way they promote your music.
40. When meeting up with Kurt Loder and Carson Daly, be sure to meet up with Fred Durst to ask for pointers.
41. Always give credit to Korn and say they brought back "metal" from the dead.
42. Make sure you have at least one female member.
43. Be at every single "Ozzfest" tour.
44. Your t-shirts must be plain black with your logo in front and a teen-angst quote in the back.
45. Pretend that you design your own website.
46. Get Ross Robinson, GGGarth, or Brendan O' Brien to produce your record.
47. Always make sure that you delay your album release. If it's scheduled for June 5, move it to July 7. Do this at least twice per album.
48. Ask guest rappers or any member from another nu-metal band to participate on your album.
49. Always whine.
50. Close your eyes when singing to show how "depressed" you are -- ie. Staind.
51. Body piercings are a must.
52. Make sure that you have at least one band member that's bald,
53. Or have a goatee.
54. Pretend that you hate the world.
55. During live shows, make sure that you dive to the crowd and ask them to return you back.
56. Your pants must be low-waist, and must show your boxers underneath when you lift your shirt.
57. Your drummer must be topless during live concerts.
58. Bite the microphone when singing.
59. Swing the microphone stand while headbanging in unison.
60. Always suck up to the crowd during a live performance -- ie. "its a good day to be here in Los-@#%$-Angeles!"
61. Insert the word "@#%$" in the middle of two words -- ie. "I like coco-@#%$-nut"
62. Zildijan must be your official cymbals.
63. Your guitars must be Ibanez or Fender. Accept no substitutes.
64. Always use seven-string guitars.
65. The more stomp boxes and pedals you have, the bigger the chances of you winning a "Best Guitar Player" award. So get to it!
66. Wear facepaints or masks, and when someone labels you a Slipknot rip-off say that you existed as early as 1977.
67. When someone asks how your next album is going to turn out, say that its going to be the "heavy-@#%$-iest album of all @#%$ time".
68. Read #67 but add more of the word "@#%$" as much as possible for emphasis.
69. Make sure that when it comes out, it doesn't sound as heavy as you said it would be.
70. Your song lyrics must have the word "@#%$" on at least 3 songs. This rule only applies to pretentious "tough-as-nails" bands.
71. Pick fights with random bands to show how "bad-ass" you are.
72. If you intend to copy someone else's sound -- don't use any form of profanity whatsoever when writing song lyrics, so the attention of the critiques will be focused on the lyrical content instead of your music. For more information, ask Linkin Park because they are considered as the "masters" of this art.
73. When kids start calling your band "sell-outs", reply that if they were on your position they'd do the same thing as well.
74. When kids start calling you a copycat, say that the band you're being compared to is one of your musical influences or,
75. Its just a coincidence.
76. Make fun of gay people at all times. This is a perfect way to hide the fact that you're a closet gay.
77. When your parents tells you to go to your room -- go to your room.
78. You must have a studio album out every year. If you can't pull a studio album in just a year, an album with demos and remixes of old songs will do.
79. Make sure that you get into a scuffle with security on every single concert you partake in to cause a "scene".
80. Wash your sneakers only 4 times a year.
81. Wear clothes from a particular clothing company -- and soon they will ask you to endorse their wardrobe. Perfect choices are Adidas and Puma.
82. Release a video that contains nothing but backstage footage of your band making asses out of themselves.
83. During live shows say that you're about to perform a song they already know. Utter the first word of the song title then ask the fans to complete the name of the song by pointing the mic towards them. Keep on doing it until they scream the title crystal clear, or if you've wasted 5 minutes just getting them to complete the task.
84. Your fanbase must comprise of 90% morons that have usernames on the internet patterned after your band and the last 10% with smart guys that use original names.
85. Your band name must be a mispelling of an original word.
86. When parents start blaming your band for having songs that incite violence, turn the blame back on them by saying "you never spent time enough with your kids".
87. When someone points out the similarities of your music with another band which rose to popularity just recently, pretend that you've never heard of them before.
88. Cancel at least 5 of the tour dates you intend to play in the near future.
89. Claim that the posturings of anger and depression in your songs are genuine.
90. Insist that your band is "metal" at all times.
91. Best Buy and Hot Topic must be your core album distributors.
92. Say that you're going to commit suicide whenever no one pays attention to you.
93. Your idea of being unique is donning black and white facepaint and acting like a depressed troll in your bedroom.
94. Pretend that you like Kittie's music but in reality you just want to score on at least one member.
95. Say that rule #94 is a lie! Then stomp your foot on the ground repeatedly while screaming "that's not true! that's not true!" over and over again.
96. Your first radio single must have clean vocals or at least melodic riffing.
97. Waste your time writing a song dedicated to taking potshots at the critiques and the people that make fun of your otherwise stupid music.
98. If you are a new band, cover an old 80s song and make it as catchy as you can. Ship this song as your first radio single -- instant success!
99. Participate in as many compilation albums as you can.
100. Strictly no guitar solos.
101. You are offended personally by every single rule written above.

Comments

[luke89]

haha funny shit, true too

[Mikhailo]

Verrrry nice!!!

[chaz man]

neat

[Martinius]

Ha! Ha! Ha! Who's the genie who wrote this!? Really funny! LoL

[Mikkel]

2nd

i cant believe i just read all that, still most of its true, kill nu metal

[Blackbullet]

LOOOOL funni, true too

[Mikkel]

shit i thought i was 2nd, damn you other people who posted when i was reading

[KevinHallX]

well i'm a nu-metal dork myself and i still agree with all those rules. i guess they must be true. not bad but i liked the one about "extreme metal" better.

[fatboy]

Hasnt this been done before? A LOT

[zepplinmike]

I saw this list on another website. It is all true.

[Until_it_sleeps]

its like 70 pages long.. but its true and funny so nice work

[zed leppelin]

lol thats freakin hilarious

[Spaced Invader]

yea

[AuthenticBass]

i only seem to apply to only about 5 of those rules

[MetalMania30]

11. No guitar solos.

This is why Nu metal sucks ass

[MetalMania30]

100. Strictly no guitar solos.

See what i mean!!!!!!!

[metallicker]

whats wrong with ibanez's or fenders?what if you happen to like zildijan cymbals?i have a wallet chain.......but it was funny tho!

[CasualtiesArmy]

A HA!...Fuckin nu metal shit

[jordy_scp]

I can't figure out what band is reffered to in rule #98. It's probably something easy but help would be appreciated. Cool stuf btw Kick Ass

[DeSean]

thats all fukin wank!!!

[deftones17]

yeah nothin wrong with fender or ibanez... so sling my slong whoever said that.. but funny article..

[benneboy]

haha, some of the shit is funny, but alot of the other stuff represents most rock music in general.

[benneboy]

or stupid hip-hop (Cough Cough M&M)

[the_beastly_one]

Haha, nice!

[DParis]

ARGH

thats quite funny but why would you write all that? in fact, why did I read all that?

[howaceisjoe]

how in the hell did you think of 101!! im impressed, its soo true

[spine2600]

***in dumbass. Thats the stupidest shit i've ever read. I like some nu-metal, like Chimaira and Slipknot, and i know most of that shit was refering to punk rock. And most of the other stuff is just shit the author of the article said to try and make himself look cool, when he probably listens to nu-metal.

[kooldonuts]

lo, mad funny, every signle rule is true, i love linkin park, but they do use basic shit

[Weebl]

I can't figure out what band is reffered to in rule #98. It's probably something easy but help would be appreciated. Cool stuf btw Kick Ass

Alien Ant Farm i think, funny article though, and all true.

[bass_maiden]

/42...
whats wrong with female members?
/13...
so bands have females playin bass jus to win awards? oh its not cos they're talented or nothin... n do linkin park have a female member? or taproot or limp bizkit or anybody else whos nu-metal?? cos i cant think of none...

[(sic) Breed]

Ok, very funny, You repeated a few though!!

[jeeba jaba]

yeah theres nothing wrong with fender or ibanez, otherwise not too bad an article

[Unforgiven Otlw]

Spine, its a joke,(a funny one at that) so shut up.

[robert_smith]

whats funny is that they are all correct
good work =)

[robert_smith]

and limp bizkit do have a female member
fred durst

[dyingforwhat]

I applied Linkin Park to every rule and it was true lol.

[Man Made Errer]

lol, not bad, although as some people said, parts of it regard rock in general. And Bass_Maiden, the only band I can think of is Coal Chamber, but they're gone.

[home sick alien]

"its like 70 pages long.. but its true and funny so nice work"

lol what is that site????

[giveitaname87]

That was good. lol

[will102387]

dyingforwhat:
I applied Linkin Park to every rule and it was true lol.

haha... no stfu. anyways i can agree with a lot of things on here but some are just a little streched. it gave me "slap on the knee" kinda laugh.

[Tom Martin]

hehe, kinda funny. Isn't stereotyping great?

I really don't know why people bash Nu-Metal so much tho...

[Unseen_hero]

spine is the only one who couldn't take. hilarious...
spine quit bitching

[janecoffin27]

This is awesome.

[TheWarlock724]

I dont even think they're considered nu metal, but if there was one good nu metal band it would be system of a down, even though i dont think they should be categorized with linkin park... how insulting...

[TheWarlock724]

and yes this is pretty ***in funny...

[TheWarlock724]

triple-post:

And the thing about Kitty is halarious!!!!

[MusicFan]

Isn't it funny to watch all the stupid people get riled up over an article from the internet? ha, ha!

[anynamehere]

lol this is great, whoever wrote this must have a lot of free time

[Blinkrules828]

Good Article..very funny.. but since wen is Thursday Nu-metal? Thursday is a good band

[reed]

That was pretty funny, yup! I like it when people defend nu-metal tho... they're just as funny!

[KevinHallX]

I dont even think they're considered nu metal, but if there was one good nu metal band it would be system of a down, even though i dont think they should be categorized with linkin park... how insulting...

no system is kind of an anomilly but they're not nu-metal. i've heard them called alternative, punk metal, metal-core punk, and religious punk/metal. but not nu-metal. though i have to agree they are very good.

[undead_bunny]

Yeah, I agree with Blinkrules828, since when is thursday a Nu-Metal band??? anyway besides a few things that apply to most rock in general...good jorb!

[K-os]

Funny, yes... but slipknot has solos on their new album and shadows fall along with killswitch engage have solos. But over all it was great especially the Kittie thing

[crzywhiteboy]

didnt you make a thred and post this same thing.

[Eggy331]

I like most nu-metal bands... especially slipknot, but this article was pretty funny. i could just picture chester bennington going to his room after his mother told him to

btw, chimaira and killswitch engage are more metalcore than nu-metal. slipknot's new solos kick!

[Feelthevayne]

thrash SUCKS metal SUCKS ALLL YOU FUCKING SUCK AHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHASHAHHA
I AM COREY TALOR HAHAHAHA

[Darth_Qurashi]

i'm gonna try to do everything in these rules, i'll see if it actually works, lol

[Feelthevayne]

oh yeah PUNK SUCKS TOOO AHAHAHAHHAHA

[dai the flu]

sweet

[Feelthevayne]

I heart cheesy metal heads who have thier "heads" up thier metal ass ...this article was written by one of those people

[Feelthevayne]

CHIMAIRA IS THE BEST BAND EVER

[Feelthevayne]

no but realy this is pretty funny but not all of its true...for all you know these people are still abused i was beaten as a child and you cant let go of that or emotional torture of being an outcast

[cheesetastic]

drrr duuhhahah falaldfall, shuttttt up you idiot no one cares about your gay observations nu metal and korn are great ha

[nasty_santa409]

11. No guitar solos

*cough*godsmack*cough
*

80. Wash your sneakers only 4 times a year

I never wash my sneakers.

[biohazardous56]

that was hilarious

[NovaHawk]

First of all, this isn't original work, second of all, half of it isn't even true, and last but not least, Godsmack isn't Nu-metal, they're hard rock, and they DO have guitar solos.

I don't like some of the bands people have named any more than the rest of them, but to group them all into the "Nu-metal" group is just plain stupid. People classify Chimaira as "Nu-metal" but they really kick a lot of ass and put on a great show.

[CvPrEpKiLLaH]

I like the extreme metal one better, but this is truer to the music style

[UseYourBrain]

this was funny

[noob4lyfe]

ROTFLMFAO XD

[Jasomat]

whoever said that chimaira kicked ass needs to listen to chimaria. have you? if you have you will see that they are terrible. the are much worse than linkin park. yes, linkin park is a horrible band, but chimaira is as bad as it gets. i used to have to listen to them everyday. great article. funny. it fits linkin park to a tee.

[noob4lyfe]

Ok, I finally read the whole thing ;x
Very funny shit.

[noob4lyfe]

Darth_Qurashi:
i'm gonna try to do everything in these rules, i'll see if it actually works, lol

Lmfao

[OwenOD69]

Alright, I hate nu-metal as much as the next guy, but that was just lame. Seems like all you have to do around try-hard rockers is badmouth nu-metal or Blink-182 and you'll get your ass kissed by everyone. Pathetic. Nu-metal died, quit flogging a dead horse.

[jeremyrozario]

damn somebody wrote this article before me, but my hats off to him/her, this is really some funny shit, i give it 5*s

[koreazz7]

lol

[Geldof the Grey]

that was kind of shit...

[hyder]

hey people....
this article was written by me.....
didnt know i had to register....
anyways,,,,,ive got more good stuff coming up....
the next articles called "131 ways to tell if your a mallcore kid"
pretty darn funny....check it out....
and nice to hear tht you guys had a good laugh at this....rock on!!!

[hololos]

lol
ditto

[erika]

funny funny...hahahahehe

[tumble]

Not bad, i recon bout 50/60 of them rules are v-true

[tainted (dreams]

i like nu-metal a lot.....but most of these rules are true...and it does fit linkin park to a tee...nice work on this one!

[fft_axl_rj]

07. Add another $50 if they are able to invent a new genre dedicated solely to your band -- ie. Death Metal Disco (Static X), Melodic-core (Thursday), Christian Rap Metal (POD).

lool
oh i miss the time when there was only rock, hard rock and heavy metal

[SBR]

ok im ready to go :P

[spine2600]

spine is the only one who couldn't take. hilarious...
spine quit bitching

you're a ***in dumbass. why don't you read what i said. i was stateing how ***ing stupid this was, and that the author was trying to look cool. 6 of those are true, but the rest are B/S.

[BibaLin]

This is no better than the death metal one. tHE death metal one is the bestest most funniestest.

[Klown]

damn fun reading...

bring me to the 70's so i dont have to watch this destroy the music

[iamjosh]

85. Your band name must be a mispelling of an original word.

LOL so true... this is pretty funny.

take it lightly guys... its just a lil rock humor

[Joe@Disturbed16]

I read the first 4 and it was a recipe to becoming those Limp Bizkit fags. But some of those rules are pretty funny and true.

[nirvanafan11111]

ok 1 chimaira are amazin listen to the band not the singer technichally they are way ahead of any of u bedroom guitarists 2 tht really hilarious nu metal crap on linkin park needs to be given a comedy award

[Death Of Season]

personally I am a pretty big nu-metal fan, but this was still hilarious.

[Streetsoldier]

Let's not me biasis towards the bands that you've been listening to for years just to sound hard- poser.

[kurtcobain19945]

That was a good article I especially like the part about trying to score one of the girls from KITTIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! awesome article DUDE

[shadowskill515]

Funny ecpept Ross Robinson is a good damn producer.

[bryon]

excellent work dude

[BigAndyW]

Funny, except Zildjian cymbals are onje of the best make in the world, which is why so many people use them, duh.

[cannonball_900]

article sucked cock..but many of d ideas wat korn n limp bizkit do..example..limp bikzit said RMV was gonna be an earthquakin album..wtf..wen i heard it, it turnd out 2 be some shit wit covers n copies..use *** in every word? thats not true bout nu-metal..ever watched forrest gump? try rememberin d hippy who used it.. for sure he wasnt a rocker..usin ibanez or fender?fender isnt a really good idea..probably d kid read only those 2 brand names around..n cancel tour dates?hey motha***a..guess u like limp bizkit d way it is..n havin mispelled words as band names?that says it all..u know only limp bizkit and korn..o yea..i wouldnt say korn came in nu-metal though..last..instead of seven stringers, why not use 12?d way u wrote ur article,seems u think the more strings a guitar has, d heavier sound it makes..asshole doesnt kno much..u wrote d article, i wrote d comments..suck ma cock..its so hard ur damn soft mouth would tear..

[Aero_Zeppelin17]

*sigh* Limp Bizkit ***s up, and every other metal band pays for their stupidity.

1. Korn is a great nu-metal band. They once were, and they still are.
2. Linkin Park isn't even metal. They're a fusion of rap and hard rock.
3. The person who wrote this needs to stop bleeding from their crotch.

[kryptonite22]

Most of that's true. And funny.

[Emenius Sleepus]

lol y not try to score wit one of the Kittie chicks... that's all they're there for

[Nirvana07]

nu-metal sucks.plain and simple

[behn_rocker]

dude, great article, very true all the way through. the mallcore one is also good. keep up the good work. and guys... i like some nu-metal (but i'm full on rock) so don't think i'm discriminating against nu-metalers. i enjoy some stuff. well anywasy, good job man... and in a couple of seconds, please stay tuned for a letter to a poster.

[behn_rocker]

dear cannonball_900

please learn to spell properly. and if you continue to spell like that, please try to stick in the words "dawg", "homie", and "fa-shizzle". please try not to speak ghetto on posting boards. thank you.

fashizzle, yo
Behn Rocker

[sithian476]

your articles are the stupidest shit ever. die. right now.

[tremontifan]

that's hilarious, i used to like linkin park but then i started to listen to dream theater and now i think lp is crap. rock on!

[annylei]

SO true...

[Riaghan]

yeah, i really wanna *** one of the members of kittie...

[DaveWithAnAxe]

reading 101 reasons is boring... find a hobby or something...

[THE KORNMAN]

"tru dat playa"

[slayingmantus]

Riaghan: hell yeah man, same here!

[JimmyJackrabbit]

This was amusing, but just as pointless as the "metallic of ah" article...

[alaskanbassist]

This was a really funny article and very true

[Psykotik]

Pretty funny

[DefunctPunk06]

funny shit

[slimslowest]

I can't figure out what band is reffered to in rule #98. It's probably something easy but help would be appreciated. Cool stuf btw Kick Ass

Limp Bizkits rip off of behind blue eyes and Kid Rocks rip off of bad company, feel like makin love...these songs kick ass by themselves, why the hell do they have to screw them over by tryin to redo it...but i guess another reason why i hate nu metal

[ledlover]

this is great
but whats wrong with female members

[0blue skies0]

NU-METAL RULES - HERE'S WHY:

like any genre...some nu-metal bands will suck..others will rock. Check out Korn, System Of a down, slipknots 1st album, deftones for awesome nu-metal bands. GOOD nu-metal bands bring "sexyness" and "groove" into metal (pretty "jazzy" really) - they're VERY heavy - they're "dynamic" - soft verse, loud chorus. their voice is an instrument - they sing, whisper, scream, whine, growl, talk, chant etc. all in the same song. they mix genres: rap, rock, metal, funk and traditional sounds (tribal drums, eastern melodies). the drums rhythms are amazing and crazy. the tunes are melodic.. yet heavy. the whole sound is so full of ENERGY.

nu-metal is MEANT for MOSHING.

the melodic verses are a "rest" before the f**k heavy chorus crashes down. nu-metal is epic. the words can cover all sorts of things...and can be poetic or political.

nu metal is about HEAVINESS and ENERGY.

i love led zep etc. but you cant mosh to that stuff. u can only groove, dance and do pelvic thrusts.
other metal is for moshing like a gun-toting meathead.
nu-metal is for moshing with style and groove.

[0blue skies0]

nu-metal just takes everything to an extreme - but in a balance where each player is audible.

as opposed to other metals...black metal for instance...u cant hear the voice, 80 hair metal.... u cant hear the drums etc. etc.

[0blue skies0]

NU-METAL is for moshing to. it will seem crap if listened to whilst turned down low, on your own sitting on a f**king chair. coldplay is bedroom music.
led zep is actually bedroom music: air guitar and pelvic thrusts). but nu-metal is for moshing to.

[fr33ksh0w]

What i find amusing is that this received so much praise whilst the Pop - Pink diss only took abuse. No doubt 90% of the people saying 'this is so true man' are talentless pop punk f**k ups. Grow the f**k up, and go back to your four power chord progression and get NOWHERE. Some Nu-metal is the best music ever created e.g. Korn, Deftones, System of a down. Just coz the songs have a bit of depth to them doesnt mean you can sneer at them, but Mest rule of course don't they.....you dumb f**ks

[Zawa122188]

guess what u guys..........i think he looked at a band then wrote a rule then looked at another band wrote one this is all bull shit those rules dont apply to nu metal at all....

[billiejoe_dirnt]

*** yes he said no guitar solos TWICE.

ps. blink 182 really suck

[billiejoe_dirnt]

metallica rule!!
you probably think im joking but this is not my sign in account

[RockNRollGuy420]

i dont like nu metal but that was ***ing pointless some of them were kindof funny but um i didnt really laugh and you just said this to try to look cool didnt you???? BUt *** nu metal but this article is kind of a waste of youre time

[OminousX]

Funny how 11 and 100 are the same hahaha.

[hog mountin]

haha good article gave me a good laugh

[pitiful_lies]

101. You are offended personally by every single rule written above.

Genius. nu metal sucks, but you kinda repeated urself a bit

[yan_halen]

Hey yo, not all nu-metal bands suck.

[#1Angusfan]

true...
so true...

[*'-'*]

he he he
you = funny
funny = entertaining
entertaining = me like
me like = 5 stars

[5:15_Whofan]

you're special

[dimebag7]

man so true hes a geunies!

[sexy-man]

very stereo typical, 1 star not all new metal bands are like that

[buckethead101]

fender!!!! I like teles only dude. I hate strats. It's so all-around.

[buckethead101]

and besides fender has no seven-string model in their line!!!!

Seven-string manufacturers are:

Schecter
Ibanez
BC Rich
Washburn
ESP
Music Man
Jackson

If There are any else, add it up!!!

[INNOCENT VICTIM]

What the hell is wrong with you!!! No guitar solos!!!!! How do you think bands like Trivium and Children of Bodom got so big???!!! Are you really a guitarist?

[xchiefx]

that's funny. even if it is baggin on my favorite genre

[glm]

Hyder you didn't write this is origionaly from entertainment.inuk.com.

[shiznac]

there is no such thing as nu metal

[shiznac]

led zepplin sux it is nothing special

[shiznac]

pitiful_lies wrote:

101. You are offended personally by every single rule written above.

i was offended

[jy9626]

THERE SHOULD BE ONE LIKE THIS FOR OTHER GENRES.
FOR EXAMPLE: 101 RULES FOR CLASSIC ROCK. 103 RULES FOR HEAVY METAL.
i mean, what music does the dick who wrote this article listen to?

[wizards?]

obviously not nu metal, nu metal just isn't right, metalheads hate people that like rap, and vice versa. Why mix the two and piss off both parties?

[stanleybach]

INNOCENT VICTIM wrote:

What the hell is wrong with you!!! No guitar solos!!!!! How do you think bands like Trivium and Children of Bodom got so big???!!! Are you really a guitarist?

Did you not read any of this list? It was about Nu-Metal, and Trivium and CoB aren't Nu-Metal.

[slayer1516]

INNOCENT VICTIM wrote:

What the hell is wrong with you!!! No guitar solos!!!!! How do you think bands like Trivium and Children of Bodom got so big???!!! Are you really a guitarist?

Neither of those bands are mallcore. COB are metal and Trivium are emo (equips flame shield)

[Soadfan8]

lol thats great. the people takin this seriously need to chill out a bit.

[Gundersmoot]

I've heard guitar solos in nu metal. Not a lot of them but their present. Besides there isn't alot of nu metal bands that i can think of. I hardly associate linkin park with any kind of metal so i'm not going to count them... but Korn and Slipknot, Mick, Munky, James, Head, are all good guitarists. And Paul and Fieldy are amazing bassists. Nu metal is a better genre than a lot of genres out there.

[Depression]

"Hey yo, not all nu-metal bands suck."
-Yan Halen

"Yo, yo, peace nigga. I am Linkin Park fan yo tr00 metal. \m/"

You must be joking :P Hail Black Metal!!!

pitiful_lies:
101. You are offended personally by every single rule written above.
shiznac: "i was offended"

This is nothing serious, faggot.

[Depression]

Anyway a great and amusing article, thank you.

[nfldguitarist]

funny but next time try making your own list instead of ripping it from the Nu Metal list thing on the internet.( dont believe me just put Nu Metal on google and its like the first thing that pops up)

[pantallica95]

all these lists are great...

[EmgSpooner]

Btw Nu metal does use solo's well band with hevyr elements A7X have shithot solos, n some BFMV n some disturbed