Rabbits GP4, 5, Midi Epic Progressive/Black/Opethy/Pain of Salvationy Metal C4C C4C!


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silhouettica
02-18-2009, 07:51 PM
Alright! So, my band, Nocturnal Hour, have just today put the finishing touches on this composition. It's a 17 minute long, (Yes, I know, but trust me. It's not repetitive at all, and totally worth it), opus of intricate riffs, melodies, and bass solos!

I'm putting it in Midi and GP 4/5, but it really SHOULD be listened with RSE ON. It makes it sound a lot better, and is mixed perfectly for it. Without it, a lot of the parts will sound very bland, and you will hardly be able to hear the "Epic Bass Solo". Just a fair warning.

Anyways, so, hope you like it, it's a bit different from my other work, more like "Desolate", than any other. But enjoy, this track, Rabbits.

Oh, and C4C, of course.

*Just a note, bear in mind that there ARE vocals for it, so the times where certain riffs repeat a bunch are for vocals.

The Grem
02-18-2009, 11:33 PM
This sounds like it could have been a song off Orchid by Opeth!. The whole song reminds me a lot of "Forest Of October". Riffs, drums, and composition are all amazing. Everything is great and nothing needs changing except the stuff I'm about to mention.

In Part III the acoustic guitar playing the melody is playing too many notes. Taking a few notes out will make the melody stick in your head easier. The guitar solo's were kind of disappointing, they need more variation.

Also the song has many fade out and fade in's. This just makes me wonder why you don't chop this up and make several songs out of it as sections don't repeat later in the song.The 17 min run time is somewhat onerous.

Acoustic and clean stuff is better than the distorted stuff(just an observation)

Overall great vibe, great song.

icronic
02-20-2009, 05:42 PM
Thanks for the crit

Anyway, I'll crit as I listen

Part I

Great intro, drums were really powerful. My only suggestion would be to unmute the guitar on the crash hits, to emphasize that rhythm even more than it already is.

Loved the melodies in the slow part that followed, the two guitars really worked well together. The acoustic bit preceding Part II was awesome as well.

I did think the drums were quite a bit too loud and aggressive though, it kind of took away from the otherwise melodic nature of the song.

I'm also kind of torn about the bass. You've got some absolutely phenomenal runs in there but there were times when it felt like the bass just needed to back off and hold onto a note and let the guitars do their thing.

Part II

Nearly perfect. My only suggestion would be to add a little more variation to the drums, I heard a lot of really great opportunities for some great drum fills.

Part III

Great everything. Drums were again a little overpowering. I think this section would have been better suited with kind of a jazzier Martin Lopez styled thing. Another awesome acoustic bit at the end there.

Part IV

Awesome, weird, and totally out of place. I loved it, but where the heck did it come from?

Part V

Didn't like this part at all. From the transition in, it just sounded off. The solos and rhythms weren't very interesting, the note choice was really off, and the drumming is really getting boring. I will say that the 0-17 0-15 0-12 etc... at the start of Zach's solo was brilliant though.

Part VI

Seems like it's become a totally different song. All the parts are really nice, although the drums and bass are both way too loud. The addition of the keyboard is really nice.

Epic Bass solo

Not very epic really. Needs some attention to the phrasing instead of just stragith 8th notes. That little lick that the guitar does is really cool, although it might sound a little better as a half step bend instead of a full step. Although I didn't always agree with the note choices, I think the two guitars worked nicely together, and that riff/melody made a nice outro.

---

Overall I thought it was a great piece. I do however think that the quality started to slide once you hit part V though.

Some work with the mixing would help a lot, except for the heavier portions of the song the bass and drums were usually much too loud.

I really think you need to completely rework the drums. They work for the heavier portions of the song, but for the rest, they're just much too aggressive and bland sounding, and they don't match the other instruments very well.

I don't mean to sound overly harsh, I really did like it, as the fact that I listened to the whole thing should suggest.

Gerbs
02-22-2009, 02:06 PM
Hello.

Just to let you know, I will crit this piece eventually (in return for your thoughts on 'Opeth-y Acoustic'), however this will only be when I have access to a copy of Guitar Pro 5.

At the moment, I have just formatted my PC and will have to 'acquire' another copy.

When that time comes, I will crit this piece, don't you worry about it : P

silhouettica
02-22-2009, 02:13 PM
Hello.

Just to let you know, I will crit this piece eventually (in return for your thoughts on 'Opeth-y Acoustic'), however this will only be when I have access to a copy of Guitar Pro 5.

At the moment, I have just formatted my PC and will have to 'acquire' another copy.

When that time comes, I will crit this piece, don't you worry about it : P

Haha, ok, thanks man.

Burning_Angel
02-22-2009, 11:28 PM
Eh... it seemed like you were trying too hard to make a song epic and long, as opposed to actually writing a good song, screw how long it is.

It came off as really choppy, with a few good parts that didnt even stick in my head for all the other randomness. The note choice and rhythms were boring, and it seemed like every other time it'd be a distorted bit, then acoustic. Then distorted, then acoustic. IT was just tiresome. I will however, say that the clean part at the beginning was quite good.

You'd be better off chopping up all the good bits that work together, and making one quality metal tune out of it.

huevos
02-23-2009, 03:50 AM
*Post reserved for crit*