Thrash Song? c4c?
View Full Version : Thrash Song? c4c?
02-20-2009, 08:01 AM
Thrash song here...
When the fuel burns
A fire will ignite
Everyone will gather
Around this strange new sight
People will be wondering
About this odd machine
Hidden from plublic
Buried in the deep
Waking from it's sleep
It lifts above the ground
No one can outrun it
As it shoots without a sound
It proves to be a point
Invincible the least
Destructable the better
Rising from the Sewer
Governing our Bodies
From their seat
Hiding in the corner
Stranger in the night
Cease to Decist...
Those who have the time
Can Try to Get away
Even thought it's pointless
It's better than to stay
The ones that stayed behind
Tried to find a way
Their fight was useless
They got them anyway
How they will attack
Protection's non existant
And there's nowhere left to hide
The only thing to do
Is sit and wait for death
Hope oss inconsistant
The World is at an end
Just when they thought
That They would give up
Using their last chance
They attack with full force.
Sorry to say,
Their Attack didn't work
Everything was useless
They knew from the start
Target in sight
Nothing to do now
They know it's time to die
The Enemies fall
No shots are heard
The Air that sustained us
Cause for their Death
02-20-2009, 02:41 PM
I don't have too much to say, as I'm not an avid thrash listener. I can say though, that I really liked it. It always had this driving force behind it, perfect for a mosh. The intro and verses rock. The chorus was a little chromatic-y for me, but I suppose that's thrash. With no melody line to follow, it also makes picturing the chorus a tad harder. The break was once again badass, but at bar 70, have the drums hit the crash again. More power. Also, your drummer has the high hat closed at the start while also doing double bass. In the solo he opens his high hat. Is that even possible :P?
The solo was pretty sweet, but during those massive 16th note runs, there should be some rhythmic variation. The notes are all right, but constant squeedly-doo gets tiring. It gets better. If I could change one thing, bar 105, instead of tremolo picking the 12 like bar 104, do a big pentatonic (or full minor scale) descending run. It would lead into the verse awesomely.
Well, I wrote more than I thought I would. If you wouldn't mind, I have a song called Pariah on the front page, if you could review that for me, it would be greatly appreciated.
8.5/10, I'd say. Just fix it up a little.
02-21-2009, 06:56 AM
Well, the melody for the chorus is the notes where it palm mutes.
In between the chromaticness
02-21-2009, 11:57 AM
Eh, while not sounding to harsh, this is your run-of-the-mil thrash song. It's nothing we haven't heard before. There wasn't any memorable part of the song for me. The solo was the best part, but even then, it was nothing to write home about. Maybe I'd enjoy a final product withe vocals more but as of right now it gets a 6.5/10. Decent, but generic as all hell.
C4C one of mine?
Unfinished Song(Don't know what genre) (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1071663)
Prog-ish song. (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=18656902#post18656902)
02-21-2009, 07:22 PM
How the **** is it generic?
02-22-2009, 12:15 AM
Dude, no need to freak out at me. I was just voicing an opinion, whether it be negative or positive. It just sounds like something every thrash band has in my opinion.
02-22-2009, 12:29 AM
Wow man, great job on this song.
Being a fan of thrash, I find this song amazing. I mean it is kind of stock stuff, but it isn't overly generic. It's hard to call thrash generic when the sole purpose of it is to be aggressive anyway.
I have no real complaints for this song. Some of the drumming is impossible, but it's only a GP file not a real recording. :p.
C4C? =D http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1073295
02-22-2009, 01:27 AM
I can't find any songs that sound remotly like this.
And the 000s don't count
I dont rape them (i think)
And it's a thrash necessity
02-22-2009, 01:33 AM
Hey... I'll crit later since its getting late (Or early.... 5:30 am). But so far I'm loving the sound of some riffs. Very Exodus like.
So yeah... *Reserved*
02-22-2009, 07:13 PM
I don't like thrash, but that was pretty good, nice solo
02-22-2009, 08:26 PM
I don't really see why so much people didn't like this piece. I thought that it was a excellent piece at best and probably better than most songs I have seen recently. I'd probably buy an album to listen to this song again. I'm seriously surprised that a lot of people are trashing this piece of art. Anyways, great job Ploopx. BTW, Ploopx, you can't get mad at a person's crit, you have to take it or ignore it. Personally, I would take it and learn from it.
02-22-2009, 11:02 PM
I didn't really get mad, thats just how i type, sometimes i type *****s :haha
I wanted to know why he felt it was so generic since my goal was to make it the least generic possible
And We've just finished recording this.
02-23-2009, 12:20 PM
Intro I liked very much. Catchy thrashy riff. The riff after that also is pretty good. I like Seems a little repetitive though. I think it repeats to many times.
Pre verse was good going into the verse
Ahhhh the verse. THIS is thrash metal. I loved the verse quite frankly. Nothing I'd change except maybe bring the bass into it a little more.
The chorus didn't seem chorus like. To many palm mutes. Bar 33 I loved though.
Intro Riff again. I like it
Verse 2... Maybe change it a little? bring the bass into it more or try some other stuff out with the guitars; like a call and response thing.
Break was EXCELLENT! Drums made it for me. Double bass at the right time.
I like the begening of the solo. Though this sort of thing goes on to long for the solo I think, Try changing it up.
90-93 was pretty good. I liked that
And the rest of the solo after that was pretty good too
Didn't really like how you ended it. I was expecting and another shred run up the board.
The E tremolo didn't really fit in my opinion.
Post-Solo and Verse = All good
Chorus again... I just think it needs more umph
I seriously LOVE that main riff >.<
It goes on to long though for the Outro
I loved how you ended it. But maybe have the E note hold out for the very last one.
A pretty class thrash song. Something I'd buy and listen to.
The only thing that bothered me was that the chorus needed to kick in more.
7.5/10, Though would be higher if the chorus was better
C4C? Link in sig.
02-23-2009, 09:46 PM
the riff after the intro riff?
It only repeats once.
What do you think the chorus needs?
vBulletin v3.0.9, Copyright ©2000-2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.