Dear One [Instrumental/Classical??] C4C
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02-22-2009, 01:10 PM
This is an instrumental I wrote for my girlfriend a little bit ago. I have no conscious inspirations for this piece that I recall. It has mainly a piano lead with string or other instruments in the background. It's about 1-2 min long I believe, very short. Be as harsh as needed. In fact, I encourage you to be VERY harsh. It always helps me improve =p ! This piece means a lot to me. I hope you all enjoy it. I do have a recording for it on my profile if you would also like to hear it without guitar pro. I will C4C. Thank you.
02-23-2009, 02:37 PM
When I read you wanted us to be harsh I had to review this. Sadly I am very disappointed. Theres nothing to be harsh about and you know it you bastard. This was great, no way around it. Flawless piano work. Except maybe at the end when it get a bit repetitive. So ****ing change that part dumb ass. The only other thing was that the orchestral harp sounds like complete ****, unless this song is supposed to be on Legend Of Zelda then you need to change it.
Next time make a ****tier song so we can have more to complain about. :no:
02-23-2009, 06:23 PM
Meh. It wasn't bad but it is HARDLY a classical piece. Listening to it I noticed many places where you could have elaborated on a melody or changed it up a bit. Not bad though, just not the caliber of real classical music.
EDIT: Forgot... you can crit this if you wish :), http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1073295
02-24-2009, 12:22 AM
Haha thank you grem and angrysockmonkey! I really appreciate it lol. Thank you for being harsh. And I already critted your song angrysockmonkey.
02-24-2009, 03:10 PM
This is closer to being a pop song than a classical song. Just sayin'.
There's really nothing wrong with the song. I would just say, it doesn't have a part that stands out, like I think every song should have. It could just be me, but I don't like having a flat consistent mood the whole way through. Also, as a writer I feel I've defeated half the point of using a piano when you can play most of it with one hand, but that could also just be me.
And I agree that you should write worse music before you tell us to be harsh. I couldn't have any fun with this. =(
02-24-2009, 03:46 PM
Like everyone else said, if you want us to be harsh you need to write worse music :)
All the parts are really beautifully written, and everything is well put together.
There are only two real problems. The first was the part between bars 25-32 was very short. Just when it really felt like it was getting going and building up to something it changed into something slow.
The second, is that as fantastic as it is, it doesn't go anywhere. For all the changes the song undergoes it never actually has a feeling of movement. It just kind of stays in a constant, without a build up or release. It's like background music for a video game that's meant to just be looped, instead of a piece of music that's got a beginning middle and end.
I think part of the problem could be fixed if you used a larger range of the piano, right now it seems like it's confined to no more than two octaves. Dropping to the lower registers and back up again could really help add some kind of movement.
Anyway if you want to C4C, mines at http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1074801
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