Heavy Song


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kane2882
02-23-2009, 06:26 PM
This is a tab of my bands first song, Shadows. It's pretty heavy, in the vein of late '80s early '90s Metallica. So, if you review my song, I'll do yours, all feedback, positive or negative is welcome, but if you think it's ****, don't just say 'That was ****'. Tell me why it was ****.

EDIT

I got two more for you guys to check out:

Wearing Thin is a much mellower song with a catchy riff, a lot of friends have liked it. IMO sounds a little like Nirvana.

And there's an unfinished Heavy Metal instrumental track along the lines of Orion/Suicide and Redemption by Metallica. It needs work, but I wanted a bit of feedback :)

And don't feel pressured to critique everything, just download them, check them out and if anything sticks out, let me know.

:)

St.Loony
02-23-2009, 06:44 PM
Metallica like?
I'll defo crit this. Either tonight or tomorrow but I WILL crit it so dw

*Reserved*

SatanicShredder
02-23-2009, 10:17 PM
It sounds really repetitive and simplistic, but maybe thats just me dude. I'm used to more prog/technical type stuff.

Also the solo definately goes out of key.

For shadows by the way.

kane2882
02-24-2009, 12:14 PM
Thanks for the feedback, I'm a little unhappy with the solo myself, so I'll work on that. And some of the riffs are pretty repetetive, but some people like that, others don't. But thanks very much for the crit. Have you got any songs you want critted?

tpkemme
02-25-2009, 01:14 AM
i agree with satanicshredder than the two major riffs in the song sound pretty similar, but on the other had, this song might sound much less simplistic with a vocalist, so it's some what hard to judge.

actually, it's kinda surprising that the only part of the solo that goes out of key are the slower parts. i would go back and make sure it's in key and maybe consider adding a vocals track, but it's good

crit?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1075603

St.Loony
02-25-2009, 12:23 PM
Critting while listening. (Shadows)

Good idea for the acoustic intro though it could be much more better with maybe letting the notes let ring? Some of it also seems out of place. Or maybe thats just me.

The bass didn't really compliment the riff, nor did it give anything extra to the tension. Sounded quite boring t be honest. Again with the other guitar kicking in. Did add anything.

Riff kicked in but it hasn't "Kicked" in. I was expecting an explosive chord but it seems to drag on with the riff and this also sounds out of place.

Another riff based on the riff before, getting quite boring now.

Bar 59... Wow... That transition was poor. And the lead isn't all that good.

Bar 67... Another bar transition. Decent riff though but again some parts don't go well together. Riff seems to drag on again. Then back into the main theme

Bar 90 and the lead fill was a good idea but didn't work in my opinion. Good idea though

Riff again

Again....

Lead melody again. See above

See, I'm at bar 120 and these riffs are boring and don't flow that well. I had to fast forward to bar 145 where it sounded like something was going to happen.

What was with 149? That didn't work.

Solo. Nice opening. Some bum notes which made me cringe. Harmony I liked pretty good. And after that it was pretty good. Post solo dragged on a little.

Chugchugchug duuun. Didn't like that either. Riff again.

And same riffs again

Overall:
I found it quite boring. There were one or two good points which I could find. IT has potential but it seemed to drag on and was a tad repetitive. Like I said, it has potential but it needs alot more time into it.

3/10.. Only because I've heard worse.

Don't take this as a personal attack.

C4C? Link in sig.

kane2882
02-25-2009, 12:57 PM
Ok guys, i'm actually really glad that the feedback is like this, it's extremely helpful to a songwriter to know what didn't work, rather than what did, and I thank you for it. I think that Shadows defo needs some work, I agree that it drags on a bit, and that most of the riffs are repetetive, parts of the instrumental track are similar, just with an acoustic interlude. I will take this advice to heart, sort this thing out and re-post when I've sorted it. Feedback still welcomed on the other two songs, but I think I've got all I need in order to work with Shadows. And I'll crit you guys in a few hours, I'm pretty busy atm.