Deception + Untitled - 2 Original Heavy Metal Songs [GP5/GP4/MIDI] (C4C)


PDA

View Full Version : Deception + Untitled - 2 Original Heavy Metal Songs [GP5/GP4/MIDI] (C4C)


Bigaxmax
07-07-2009, 02:43 PM
Hello Everyone!

I've been working on some material for a while now but hadn't gotten around to putting it up here.

Haven't heard many opinions, none atleast that arent patronising :mad: so I'd like to hear some honest feedback and possibly some ideas for improvement.

These are both WIP so dont expect it to be perfect, im unhappy with plenty of stuff myself. Both of these will be used in my music GCSE's at school (I'm 15/end of year 10) so I will have to butcher them both to fit ponsy criteria :peace: but atleast it will get the grades...

So yeah, just lemme know what you think and leave me a link or something if you want a crit back :D

Thanks in advance! :p:

My Band:
www.myspace.com/bleakdawnmusic

http://i26.tinypic.com/s1mi5h.jpg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9ocqEEEJwU

ROCK ON!!! :devil:

Incubus_Rage_27
07-07-2009, 05:49 PM
OK Here goes:

Deception:
I wasn't sure about the intro riff its not really my thing but i liked the way it dropped into the next section that was well done, and the next bit its pretty good, its a simple idea used effectively and when the riff changes it reminded my of an old megadeth riff or somethin so nice one. The first riff sounded better with slow drums that was a good idea for re using the riff. Now the chorus i thought was a bit bare but had the basis of a good idea, try changing the drums up when it repeats or adding a harmony to make it more interesting. Overall it showed you have good ideas, especially for you're age so keep writing like this and you'll improve with every new song.

Untitled:
This one was a lot better, the first riff was nice great built up to that breakdown riff and i liked the tremolo picking over the top nice touch. The next bit after you repeat is quite nice and it falls back into the breakdown well. I didn't like the riff after that much but i guess it depends on the vocals over it. The solo was a nice touch, ive heard better but once again, for your age, fairly decent. The riff after the solo was good but i got completely lost in the outro i think you should shorten it a bit.

Crit mine?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1158325
Cheers.

jimmyled
07-11-2009, 02:39 PM
Liked your band name! Untitled was nice, but on the whole not that great. Maybe it's just not my style. I liked the part in what I think is the chorus that the lead guitar does a really fast lick. The solo was pretty weird, and I didn't really like. The extra ideas were great, and I liked the fast lick on there too. It adds something to the song, I can't explain.
Deception was nice too, but I liked the other better. Again I liked what the higher guitar played in Section B. The chorus was nice.
Pleas Crit: Mine! (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1160749)

CMon
07-13-2009, 07:50 AM
Deception: The main riff is pretty original and enticing IMO. That's a feat not many artists can accomplish. Still, it didn't really "kick off" until the chorus. I love the fingerplay of Track 1 in combination with the other two guitars. Otherwise, it works out fine, your drumwork is not extraordinary but it's good. Atleast you haven't attached yourself to the same trash/speed-metal rythm mayhem that 60 % of everyone on this site is dependent on.

Untitled: Would be interesting with vocals, methinks. The instruments mend nicely together up until the unfinished parts. I must admit that I'm not an expert on critting stuff like this, I usually get tired by frenetic picking and I often get the urge to add some slower riffs into the mix but that's totally subjective.

Additionally, bar 163 and onwards sounds like something CKY could have put together. If that's a good or a bad thing I don't know, I guess you'd be welcome to decide ;)

In overall, nice work though.

Bigaxmax
07-14-2009, 12:44 PM
Additionally, bar 163 and onwards sounds like something CKY could have put together. If that's a good or a bad thing I don't know, I guess you'd be welcome to decide ;)

Sweeeet, CKY are awesome. I never really thought that it sounded like them at all. I was just ponsing around trying to come up with something rather bass orientated, since most metal bands dont really emphasise on the bassist, and thats the result haha. I dont really like it too much, but then again, it didnt take me too long, and i was doing it all theoretically, cuz my guitar was across the other side of the room and im lazy like that haha.

Thanks guys for all the response :D