You Never Knew - Alternative (GP5)


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TheReverend724
10-18-2009, 05:36 PM
I've never posted here before, but please give me some feedback (both positive and negative is fine)

Name: You Never Knew


thanks
:cheers:

Momentosis
10-18-2009, 05:41 PM
As expected from a drummer, quality drumwork there.


Has a very pop-punkish vibe imo.

Probably due t the basic structure and with power chords really driving the song.

Not a bad thing at all though as some people like to think.



Nice lil riff for the intro though.

21Fretter
10-18-2009, 06:41 PM
The intro was a bit weird for me. At bar 3 i expected a shift to the A# on the G# string. Maybe I've heard too much pop-punk music but i expected that progression.

When you just stop with the clean at bar 16 it was a bit sudden for me. Maybe try a progression of single notes following the rhythm's progression (that build up) just to fill the void.

Didn't like the notes used for the clean guitar at 31.

At bars 39 and 40, maybe change the rhythm to straight forwards 8ths through out the bar. I think it would work better with that idea you've created of building up to the big chorus (not sure if it's the chorus but ja).

The "chorus" is simply awesome. That change from 50 to 51 is beyond awesome. There is just something about it.

Didn't like the transition from bar 57 to 58 but i removed bar 59 and it just flowed a lot better for me. I just felt like a quick change was better suited after that bar 57 rif***e if you know what i mean.

98 - 105 was great. I really liked that change in strumming pattern at 102, worked very nicely.

Transition in 114 was good. Fits awesomely.

I think you can completely remove 138 - 141. To me it serves no purpose. Going straight into 142 from 137 would work so better to me.

142 - 159: I don't feel it fulfills the epic ending feel. Maybe think of using the rif***e from 98 - 105 instead.

I think this is a very solid piece. Not generic and you've got the catchy powerful awesome chorus! :D

TheReverend724
10-18-2009, 06:50 PM
wow! thanks dude

I never expected such great criticism

21Fretter
10-18-2009, 07:03 PM
It's just the thought that i would like people to go into as much detail as possible to help me get my piece the best it can be if i ever get around to posting something :)

It also increases the chance of me hearing a recording of it one day :D

herby190
10-18-2009, 07:23 PM
Could you export it to GP4 for I can hear it?

If you don't know how, it's File>Export>Guitar Pro 4 Format

TheReverend724
10-18-2009, 08:09 PM
here herb

piratemetalhead
10-18-2009, 08:24 PM
Reminded of Blink 182's better stuff. Sounds pretty professional and well-done, and I loved that little synth melody in Bar 41, and that breakdown-ish part near the end sounded great as well

C4c pl0x?

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1217721

herby190
10-18-2009, 08:25 PM
I really liked it, although it really needs a bass track earlier in the song; let me know if you need help writing one, I could help you out, seeing as bass is my primary instrument.

C4C? The link is in my sig.

TheReverend724
10-18-2009, 08:29 PM
What is C4C? Comment for comment? Critique for critique?

herby190
10-18-2009, 08:39 PM
Critique for Critique would be the literal way of translating it over, yeah.