90% [gp4, gp5]


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10-25-2009, 06:24 AM
This is not yet finished.
But it's about 90% of the way there.

The lyrics that go with this song can be found here - http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1220658

Feel free to crit that too ;)

NOTE: At bar 108, that's not actually part of the song yet. It is just an idea that I wrote down in case I want to use it in the song.

Thus far the song (too me anyway) has somewhat of an Agalloch-esque feel, with a touch of Dark Tranquillity.
I'm hoping that upon completion the song will have progressed to incorporate another style or two different from those too.

C4C, you know, the usual stuff...


10-25-2009, 07:05 AM
i think the change from soft to heavier is a bit too sudden. But nice song, otherwise.

10-25-2009, 07:54 AM
Yeah the change is too sudden near the beginning.

10-25-2009, 10:01 AM
The acoustic bits are a bit slow (first one and first one right after distorted part).
The rest is friggin' awesome! :O

10-25-2009, 10:21 AM
I will critique you as I listen:

-First four bars are completely unnecessary and do nothing for the song.
-The arpeggios are nice and fit this style very well
-The lead guitar over said arpeggios is also very nice. Very melancholy.
-Bar 17-18 needs improvement because it doesn't transition very well. I would mess around with having the arpeggios continue to play and adding another guitar to play the rhythm.
-Bar 25-26 does not transition well. The distortion comes on too abruptly. Even a simple transition like a slow drum fill leading into the distortion would make it better.
-The riff in that section is good, however it doesn't really feel like it is a part of the song.
-Bar 50 on, I enjoy this section; however as I reached this section, I am left wondering why distortion guitars were brought into the picture. I would consider having the lead riff with distortion on the earlier bars play over acoustic chords. With proper usage of reverb on your guitar, you could make it very atmospheric and enjoyable.
-Bar 58 on is great. Very atmospheric and more of what I would expect from something inspired by Agalloch. The chord progression here is great.
-The solo is great and very fitting to the song. On the earlier distorted lead lines I would suggest slowing down that part to be more like this. It is much more atmospheric.
-From then onto bar 103 you have good music. I would suggest writing more leads instead of having two rhythmic distortion guitars.
-Bar 104-108 is painfully bad within the context of this piece. It doesn't fit the mood. The progression just feels wrong and the riff style is just strange for this piece.

The final portion from 108 on is great, just not for this song. It feels like another song entirely. More upbeat, yet still maintains the general dark folk style of music.