[GP5] This Card Needs To Be Activated [Indie]


View Full Version : [GP5] This Card Needs To Be Activated [Indie]

05-02-2010, 01:16 PM
Hey Guys

Back with another song, again :D

This ones finished :D The name has no relevance tbh, just random :rolleyes: But I spose the Randuumz is the norm for Indie now :D

C4C as usual ;) Also, i would be eternally thankful for a midi file :D



P.s. The V2 is only because this i changed it halfway through but kept both versions, the only difference was that the main rhodes piano part was faster and was in triplets.

05-02-2010, 01:26 PM
I don't really frequent this forum, but I saw the topic on the main page and checked it out. I thought it sounded really cool, nothing super unique or groundbreaking, but catchy and well written. Very cool.

05-02-2010, 01:30 PM
Hey buuuuuhddy

As I go

I like the rhodes

you might want to revise the fading in drums, keep the bass drum and claps, but add a switch here and there. Nitpicky though.

17. needs more ... bass. all the sound is on the top end of the sonic spectrum.

The chorus sounds almost exactly like the verse. i'd try using different cymbals.

i like verse II lol. i'm a sucker for that kinda stuff.

Really liked the outro. nice and quirky.

You know, i really like your songs. they've always got so many layers, but no one instrument really stands out, it all blends together.

Good stuff my man.

Would you mind checking out one of mine?
they're both on the front page.

P.S. I exported you a MIDI because you usually ask, and i'm not sure if you need one or not.

05-02-2010, 01:49 PM
Thanks Man

Yeah, I started working on using more layering recently as Ive started listening to Radiohead alot more :D And thanks for the midi, i really appreciate it. Ill check both your songs out now :D ;)

Thanks man ;)

05-03-2010, 02:02 PM
wow, i really like this song and even though it has the same main melody throughout the song it never really sticks out (in a bad way i mean) it flows really well. it reminds me of a prize fighter inferno (the side project of coheed and cambria's Claudio Sanchez) track which is really great!

05-03-2010, 05:16 PM
i dont really see anything wrong with this song so im not gonna crit it lol. i felt the ending/outro at 73 was to sudden though. thats all

05-03-2010, 06:34 PM
It's a nice song.
I have one little thing though: I felt the rhythm guitar's chords a bit too strong. Might be a matter of personal taste of course but I would try taking out a few notes especially the 5ths directly above the root note. It would make the chords sound smoother. I'd also cut back a little on the volume.

Here is what I meant roughly (rhythm guitar set on volume 11, a few notes in the chords in bar 17-24):

05-04-2010, 08:10 AM
I like this; however, a few changes:

The drum fade-in feels like it should have a few extra bass drum kicks thrown in, just to add a bit.

For the verse, I think you should switch to the ride cymbal instead of the loose hi-hat; adds a bit of change, and helps separates the sections.

I feel like at least on instrument (either guitar or bass) should play a whole note at 73, to hold out over the outro.



05-05-2010, 08:46 AM

I got bored and 8-bit-ized it for you. At least the intro sounds better this way, rest probably doesn't, but as I said, I was bored ;)

05-05-2010, 12:37 PM
Thanks Man, thats actually pretty cool :D ;) How did you do that? I might do it for some other of my things :D You have any pieces you want me to crit?