My Beb Wont Sleep Tonight[C4C]


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Freak44
05-11-2010, 04:59 AM
as same as always crit for crit and let me know what you think. :D

guitar ben94
05-11-2010, 01:08 PM
Great song man. Sounded great.

Intro - Piano was awesome. Really got my attention at the start of the song. The drums and strings made it better. The guitar made a nice touch and fit very well. The piano behind the guitars was very nice.

'Verse' - Sounded good. Nice piano. Guitars made a nice addition second time round and led into the 'chorus' well.

'Chorus' - I liked this part of the intro so I liked that it was the chorus. Good luck to the drummer though :P

Solo - Sounded very nice. Fit well. Not really much else to say. Was very good.

'Interlude' - I liked the return of the piano on its own. Gave a nice effect. And the lower tempo made it better.

Chorus/Outro - Gave a good, strong ending to the song(Especially as I liked this part a lot :D) Drums from measure 85 sounded good but still very much basically impossible. Maybe get rid of one of the toms?

Overall, the song sounded very good. Liked it a lot. Probably would give it a 10. Good work :D

Crit my song? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1310739

Gwrhkhsh
05-12-2010, 03:35 PM
Drummer needs 4 hands for this song. Generally it's not my thing, but it was quite good. Only those drums need something to do with them.

Freak44
05-12-2010, 11:14 PM
hehe yeh didint have enough space to seperate them usally jerrad does the toms while big b does the kicks snares and cymbyls. x]

wannabe_punk
05-13-2010, 12:05 AM
so you wrote with two percussionists in mind? that's a relief.

i won't be able to sleep tonight, thinking about that guitar solo section. that was awesome and creepy, in a classical/operatic sort of way.
i thought all of the guitar parts were written very tastefully
i would switch up the piano melody a little more in the intro, or at least play something more "lead/solo"-like before getting into the riff you had in the first 4 measures. i tend to think of a riff like that (with a shifting root note) as being more the guitar's job (see fade to black, sanitarium by metallica, or beyond the realms of death, before the dawn by judas priest)

so, like...
noodly piano intro (maybe introducing some of the prominent piano melodies in the song body) ->
play mm. 1-6 ->
drums enter, repeat mm. 1-6 on piano and continue through that section to the rest of the song

guitar_jew
05-13-2010, 12:59 AM
This could be a very catchy song if you put a vocal line over it. Which sounds like what it was written for. But that ending... you need to resolve that. End on the Bb octave, not the A. That sounds terribly unfinished. Other than that it was really good.