Kinda post hardcore/metal (GP4/MIDI)
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10-17-2010, 12:46 PM
Alright well this is a simpler piece I did for when I start my band.
I hope some of you guys like it. I think it's bar 73 that I'm not so sure about.
Mean Mr Mustard
10-17-2010, 03:08 PM
Well I love the intro. Once the drums come in it has a very chilled relaxed sound to it, and this continued into the next part. It flowed really well because the bassline continued onto this next part. However, I think that it sounds better at the beginning of the song if you only have the guitar play that first part of the intro. And then have the bass come in when the drums too, its what I would do, since that guitar riff sounds pretty full by itself.
The next part sounds good as well, not much to say, the second guitar gives a nice backing to the lead, which sounds great as it is, all spastic and whatnot.
Then 41, this sounds almost like something that Dance Gavin Dance would do, and then it leads back to that riff at 17, with the second guitar playing the intro riff...this all is very sounding very connected and it flows perfectly, like all the riffs until this point sound really well together.
Now at 65, it changed a lot, but it was still a good transition. Theres a crazyass solo which i I thought was good also. The tranistion at bar 73 wasnt all that great though like you said haha. Well Ill attach a file of what I thought sounded good at that part.
The next part is great, is it like a build of two earlier riffs that hadnt been used together before, or had they both been used like this? Well anyways, they both sound good together, and when the double bass comes in, it really sounds full and gives an epic vibe to it. After the reverse cymbal, i thought that the key change was nice and you dont really see that happen too much in this genre, so I thought that was pretty cool.
The very last part with the chord ringing out didnt sound that good to me, so I added the other instruments, so you can see if you like it that way in the file i upload.
Could you give my song a listen? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1372119
10-17-2010, 03:23 PM
Damn dude thanks for that. That really did help a lot and sounds much better. I listened to yours a bit but I didn't get time to crit it. I'll do it later. ;)
10-19-2010, 12:25 PM
Listening as I crit (sorry if it gets confusing):
Interesting dissonant intro, awesome leads. Reminds of Dance Gavin Dance, which is always a good thing. Bass keeps it interesting. bars 65- on works great, both lead wise and rhythm wise. The transition at bar 73 was unexpected but worked fine. Back to the awesome leads. Key change was definitely unexpected, but I guess it would work fine with vocals over. The abrupt ending didn't really work for me, I think a fade out would work a lot better for this song.
Overall a good, catchy tune. Not a fan of the ending but thats the only thing that bothered me. Also it wouldn't hurt to make the song a bit longer. Those are my only complaints, the rest is great.
C4C Lilith, please :)
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