Progressive Metal gp5 c4c


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swashbuckle50
02-13-2011, 02:57 AM
Just did this today, Its probably the most progressive thing I have wrote. Kind of has a protest the hero feel to it i think. Let me know what you think
c4c just leave me a link :)

MofoZofo
02-13-2011, 03:26 AM
Pretty nice, but 2 steps down ? Thats alot IMO. Yet thats just my opinion.

envoykrawkwar7
02-13-2011, 03:43 AM
^ that guy should never listen to ANYTHING by me then!
omg that verse! probably my favorite part. really awesome guitar work, definitely original.
im going to assume this is very in progress though, and not be to harsh about how its bland haha. on a list of things you need, a main melody could help a song like this out a lot, youre gonna definitely want a solo, a nice long one will fit perfect if you extend your song out a little before and a bit more after. alternatively you could use a vocal line to really fill up some of the empty space. heres the good, all your riffs sound nice and have a good consistant feel to them and build up well together, they just have a lot of emptiness to them which means its also a good template to build with. hell you could probably tack on a halfassed ending and do a boring vocal line and this thing could easily be complete, you have the perfect build to a long song or the perfect 80% of a short song, id love to see more done to this either way.

c4c? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1411276

PatrekurÍrn
02-13-2011, 01:08 PM
that was awesome, i loved the whole 15/16 but not making it sound too 15/16-y . During the verse and intro it sounded a bit ...too much going on at times but awesome nonetheless. Approaching the end that chord progression was getting pretty stale, i would've like dont a little key change to make some change. For a progressive metal song it was pretty short and a solo would be really nice to have in there.
This is pretty much my first review on UG .... C4C?

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1408337

swashbuckle50
02-13-2011, 03:00 PM
Thanks for the crits i will be returning the favors right now!

this is def just the beginning of the song there will be far more work done to it including a solo ;)

~Flounder~
02-14-2011, 05:40 AM
Hello!

I think my favorite part of the song is the opening guitar part. Really cool and and had a great rhythm to it. Although I think in measures 3 & 6 the F# sounds weird :/

Measure 10 needs to be click + deleted, IMO. Not a fan of that at all, almost every note was just plain wrong. Not only that, it was a very poor way to transition into the verse (which btw is sick!) wouldn't really change anything about the verse. But the intro and verse are both well written, strong riffs and there needs to be a sense of flow between them.

The chorus is cool too, definitely got a heavy vibe to it. The F power chord that pops in is sick too. I see what you are trying to go for with your postchorus, but I think it wasn't quite executed right. I'm not sure how I would fix it but its too hard of a leap to make between the chorus and post chorus, especially because there is no rhythmic link and since the time signatures change. Don't delete it for good, it has a LOT of potential for epics, but it definitely needs reworking.

There's not much more to say. The only thing that was different the second time was the 'breakdown'. I would personally write a much heavier breakdown, but it was definitely not run of the mill metal breakdown section, and I guess something slower/heavier might not go well with the flow of the song.

I'll give it a 6/10 for now. Like you said in the description, its obviously not a finished piece so thats a few points off. Also the transitions between the ideas need work so another point off even though the ideas themselves are solid. There is definitely potential in the song, and I'd like to hear a more complete version of it in the future!

c4c? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1412145

corrda00
02-16-2011, 10:03 PM
Intro is great. I loved it. Counterpoint, in 5/4 that doesnt sound confusing or unnatural. That is an accomplishment there.

My first question: are you a drummer? Those drum parts are sick. Especailly the Verse.

Im not sure if the Post Chorus fits, maybe do some sort of transition into it or like a 2/4 bar of rest or something, its too abrubt.

Other than that sick song man. Got some great potential.
Ill give it a 7.15451641004/10

Crit for Crit?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1412720

TehDutchDude
02-18-2011, 08:25 AM
Reviewing as I am writing.

Lovely start! I love stuff like this. Dreamy, floaty, makes me think of a beautiful landscape with a waterfall.

And gone is the waterfall! A sudden change of sound which I quite like. Chorus pops in. Good work on that! Has a bit of an epic feel of it. Post chorus brings back the intro, which I think is a good think.
Breakdown time! Starts off as a small 'conversation', nice detail. I like the way it develops. Verse pops in, sounds really good! Keep it in. Chorus pops in, once again, good job on that.

Overall: cool song. Has a nice feel to it. I don't really have constructive about it; I liked it!

C4C?

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1413519