Africa (short instrumental intro, GP5/midi) C4C


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BigBigWater
02-21-2011, 01:46 AM
Sorry to post another thread another .5 seconds later but I thought it'd work better to have individual topics.

Anyways, this is a sort of 'intro' song for all my other instrumental stuff. It's simple, while being kinda odd, but I'm fond of it and it turned out basically exactly as I hoped.

You can basically interpret the river/ocean/wind/birds as 'various nature sounds' cause that's what I was intending, haha.

Thanks for any feedback and leave a link if you want me to crit something of yours. ;D

Quibokk
02-21-2011, 02:45 AM
Not bad at all. I was expecting a melody to enter at 9 instead of an additional guitar, I felt that it was a little too much going on then. Sorta made everything a little less clear, more muddy. Perhaps more of a product of the MIDI, but nevertheless...

I really do like how you managed some more of the less used instruments in the MIDI arsenal, although I was a little disappointed by the switch to distortion at the end. But, if it transitions better to your other instrumentals, I can't really complain. I'm a huge fan of the pastoral sound you had going, though.

This was a pretty small crit, imo, so not expecting a huge amount in return - I think you may have even left your thoughts on one song of mine in the past, so only if you have anything to say/feel like it, feel free to add to the most recent thing I posted, Unrequited Cornflower - link in sig.

YesterdaysToday
02-21-2011, 11:51 AM
In the beggining I liked the kalimba sound, but it started to get reppetitive, try changing chords for it (change the kalimba notes) every say 4-8 measures, so it matches the guitar chords or the bass line.

Another thing I noticed is that the chording in 9 on track 3 did not seem in the same key as everything else, you might want to check that.

Measure 29 on, on the drums did not really match up with the song, it seemed to heavy for an instrumental like this.

Overall, pretty good song,
6.5/10



Crit Mine?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1414423

Madz
02-22-2011, 11:45 AM
This is a nice intro you have here. The first 4 bars serve as a nice introduction, wanting you to hear more of the song. A very laid back drumbeat introduces the rest of the song. While the progression is not as catchy as one might have expected, it still serves this relaxing feel.
However, 8 bars in, thing seem to get a little bit crowded, you might wanna look for cleaning things up a bit, it seems a bit too much going on, and not really using the space you have in a song. Id recommend you to try to make it sound a little more wider. For example you could try thinning out the low end chords a little bit, and replace them with higher voices. The melodies were ok, sometimes a little bit too static for my tastes, some offbeats and syncopes wouldnt hurt it. the panning served as a nice effect for the fullness.
Im a little bit sceptical on the drumbeat when it turns heavy, it is a bit too much on the bass drum side, Id thin out the bass drum usage a little bit. It really started to get a little Post Hardcore-y soundy towards the end.
On a third listen, I think the guitar and the bass clash sometimes in the clean part. This may be a part of the problem I described with thinning out the field, but maybe because of the rather full voicings you use. But I also have to admit you made a great deal of wildlife and nature sounds in this piece, very well executed.


If you want to c4c, you can crit my piece here: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1413664