Technical Metalcore Song, with sprinkles of melody


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boziffer
02-25-2011, 02:25 PM
heres my newest song i wrote this week. tell me what you think

Erra93
02-25-2011, 05:49 PM
I've gotta say I really like this song, the intro is just really great and as for the rest of the song, it keeps me interested throughout the entire song, sounds like a mix of In Flames and metalcore like The Eyes Of A Traitor, there's not a piece of it that I don't like :)

It's definitely a song I'd put on my MP3 if it were recorded, I'm not good at reviews, but I love this song. I just... yeah!

GRABBER
02-25-2011, 11:08 PM
Agreed, pretty awesome stuff. I would definitely listen to this if recorded. Don't have much else to say really, just great job!

C4C? Please.

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1415846

Mean Mr Mustard
02-26-2011, 08:12 PM
Overall, its a really good song. However, there were a few things that irked me in it. The first thing, in my opinion was that transition to the Pre-Chorus. Im talking about bar 26, that bar of 2/4 did not do it for me. It would sound better to remove that bar and go straight into the Pre-chorus, however, it would be even better to create a 4/4 bar riff to lead into the next bar. Also, the Pre-chorus seems bigger than the chorus, so to make the chorus stand out, Id have a catchy vocal part over top of it.

Also, the second transition to the Pre-chorus was much better, and the Pre-chorus itself was great, my favorite part. Next, I found the timing in the Bridge-like section a little weird, mainly at bar 95. For bar 95, I would have the rhythm as "eighth note rest, eight note, quarter note, dotted eighth note, dotted eight note, eighth note.

Lastly, it needs an outro in my opinion. It could either be:
- An entire section (which I would do)
- One bar afterwards, where a chord rings out
- One bar afterwards, where a chord is struck and then muted
- A chord at the end of bar 141, in place of the last two sixteenth notes, a chord is stuck and then muted.

Overall, good job, has potential to it. Could you C4C a song in my sig if you have time?

synestershadows
02-27-2011, 03:02 AM
This is really great! And I agree with Erra about this song sounded sorta Eyes Of A Traitor-esque. Everything seems to flow really well. It's not overly techy just the right amount. Those sweeps before the chorus sounded great and the chorus itself was simply perfect. I feel like you could've messed around with time sigs a bit more. The majority of this song is in 4/4.

Overall, this song is great and I'd love to hear it recorded with vocals.

C4C? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1403847