Two-part metal song: "The Cascade" [GP5.2] C4C


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GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 01:53 PM
Hi you guys, have been lurking these forums for quite a while now, listened to a couple of fantastic composition and finally got that thumb so firmly up my ass removed and decided to upload a song myself!

So, I've got a library at my hard-drive consisting out of some 100 songs of fluctuating quality, and from these I've picked 10 of them to compose some "debut album" of sort. Funny thing is that my guitar playing abilities kind of stopped developing three years ago (yet another anal thumb to be removed I guess) and I'm not capable of playing anything of it. Soooo... I guess I'll just stick to composing then! :)

Anyway, to the song: It is about six minutes long and consists out of two distinct parts - one fast-paced in-your-face At the Gates-esque part (with some Scar Symmetry and some other shit thrown in for good measure... with my own stylistic touch of course) and a second part, that is lumbering, slow, and epic enough to be the soundtrack of Chuck Norris vs. Cthulhu on top of Mount Everst.

Tell me what you think. Oh and I think my GuitarPro is bugged - for some reason RSE guitars are pathetically quiet, so I have to turn down the volume of the MIDI-tracks a lot to make it sound balanced on my computer. If you're not satisfied with the volume of a track, then just bloody adjust it until it sounds like you think it's supposed to.

Cheers from Sweden. And as always, C4C

Zeletros
08-05-2011, 02:02 PM
Don't compose in RSE, because many people, like me, don't have it.


Drums are incredibly bland and repetative.

Other than that, this is a good composition, though I suspect a bit too much of "chugga chugga"


edit:

2ond part is incredibly repetative

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 02:08 PM
Then I suggest you to download RSE. The song just doesn't work without it (trust me, I've tried to listen to it without it...)

And, as my guitar playing skills are somewhat lacking, there is no doubt that my drum playing skills are absolutely null and void. The drums are pretty much placeholders until some drummer can tell me how to write something else than blast-beats and "bass-bass-bass-bass-snare-bass-bass-bass" patterns.

Oh, and some critique other than "good" would be nice. Not demanding an essay but you know :p:

edit: Regarding the second part, it's supposed to be, well I guess, "repetitive". I listened to it without RSE and I agree, it's dull as hell, but if you picture some huge crashing waves and other dramatic shit while listening to it, and pay attention the dramatic progression, I think that the repetitiveness is justified... I wouldn't have it another way.

Zeletros
08-05-2011, 02:24 PM
Then I suggest you to download RSE. The song just doesn't work without it (trust me, I've tried to listen to it without it...)

And, as my guitar playing skills are somewhat lacking, there is no doubt that my drum playing skills are absolutely null and void. The drums are pretty much placeholders until some drummer can tell me how to write something else than blast-beats and "bass-bass-bass-bass-snare-bass-bass-bass" patterns.

Oh, and some critique other than "good" would be nice. Not demanding an essay but you know :P



Guitar pro is a midi-tool. It ISN'T supposed to sound good, RSE just makes it worse for me.


You have good songwriting skills but I don't really enjoy all the chugga chugga so you can't expect from me. If you are writing instrumental music, you should make it more diverse on all instruments, guitars in this case.




Theres no point composing if you can't play it... Learn to play songs you've already made


Please do not listen to this person




edit:


If you write instrumental music, being overly repetative is not okay. It's only good if it doesn't get boring, but it does if you repeat as many times as you did.

amonamarthmetal
08-05-2011, 02:24 PM
Theres no point composing if you can't play it... Learn to play songs you've already made

psycho8
08-05-2011, 02:37 PM
Ok, personally I think there isn't enough rythmic phrasing to make it interesting. It's well composed, as in everything works together, but I think it would be better if you interspersed the 1st part with some slower and more melodic sections as opposed to putting everything at break-neck speed. Likewise for the solo, I think both parts work when considered on their own but if you wrote extra links between them at a slower tempo or with more accentuated dynamics as opposed to just shred it would make it more musically interesting (IMO, a lot of other people probably won't agree but I do like stupidly long guitar solos ;p).
The main chugging riff is good, I really liked that, but I felt you overused it in that it was practically all of the first section and not much else bar the solo and instrumental bit, which I felt was a bit rushed, trying to fit too many notes into too short a time as opposed to adding more expression with fewer notes, again, bit of a personal gripe as I like lots of variation, sorry.
The second part was just far too long and repetitive, the octave riff was Ok, but it was all the same. Maybe some slower cleaner licks could have been written into them instead so they weren't quite as repetitive, I'm not sure.
So, to finish, I know it sounds like I've basically hated the whole thing and that it should be slower, which isn't true, I just think that writing something at entirely the same speed without variation is a little uninteresting. In terms of riffs and chord structures and the like I did like what you had written, I just would have prefered more melodic structure. I'd probably give it a 5 or 6 out of 10 because with a bit of altering it would be excellent to my tastes, but that's just the opinion of some random person on the internet so feel free to ignore everything I've said as complete rubbish ;p

frankibo
08-05-2011, 02:39 PM
Theres no point composing if you can't play it... Learn to play songs you've already made

If this was true composers wouldn't exist.

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 02:46 PM
Theres no point composing if you can't play it... Learn to play songs you've already made

I do whatever I please, thank you. Might not have the time to sit around and repeat guitar licks all day so that I can play that fast solo, considered that?

Oh, the song is not an instrumental. The vocals are just growled so there's really no point in making a new track for them :)

Oh, and this is, well, "the fast song" of the album. No other composition keep this break-neck tempo, but it fits with the mood and theme of the song. And the two parts are supposed to be polar opposites of each other, therefore the slow and "repetitive" outro.

I guess tastes differ, eh :)

psycho8
08-05-2011, 03:09 PM
If this is the "fast song" as you say, could you post up the rest to see how it fits as a whole? That would give the song the context you know it has and make it easier for us to judge how well it is written as part of an album as opposed to just a song on its own.

Ometh
08-05-2011, 03:22 PM
Another crit, here we go!
Starts off with an evil riff over a skank beat, kind of generic, but still nice. Like the guitars playing complementing riffs at at 8, pretty nice. Verse features some nice bass riffing over palmuted riffing, sounds nice, although more interesting guitarr riffing in this part would be nicer, then it comes a nice melodic break and a reintro, stll nice, not tiring at all. Then it comes the verse riff again. I like the use of 7/4 in the Instrumental part, and the epic riffing that follows, pretty awesome. The guitar solo is pretty nice, I like the fact that is kind of a "guitar battle", in my band we do that alot, it sounds and it is fun. The second solo starts with mindless sweeping and then it changes into pentatonic-like rape, wich is pretty cool. The first riff repeats for the third time, it's getting kind of bored again, but then it comes the verse riff again, with a badass decrescendo into an epic string section. Like it alot, but why is it so low in the mix? I cranked the ****ers up and relistened to a couple of riff and the piano and strings really complement the riffing, kind of like Fleshgod Apocalypse's new album. Now, back to the string section. Then it comes the piano, sounds really atmospheric and epic when the other set of strings come in. The riff that follows is pretty awesome, generic, but hey, who cares. The melody changes in 135, and it sounds really good, reminds me of epic melodeath. The next section, with the piano and clean guitar sounds so mellow and awesome, pretty nice ending.
Now I give you these songs to crit, you can choose whatever you want:
A melodic, upbeat rock song: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467762
Or
A brutal brutal death track: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467924

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 03:28 PM
If this is the "fast song" as you say, could you post up the rest to see how it fits as a whole? That would give the song the context you know it has and make it easier for us to judge how well it is written as part of an album as opposed to just a song on its own.

Sure. Here are two other songs, quite different from The Cascade:

Through Hollow Corridors
Lots of twists and turns in this one, both in time signature and key. Slower tempo, but it varies as well. Groovy main riff that also serve as the verse. Picture the vocal delivery as angry screaming more than a death growl - a Slipknot vibe if you will. (And don't judge me, trveheadz)

What If...
Album finisher and quite an odd choice for it, but I've got my reasons. I wrote it about two years back, and it is far more accessible and pop-influenced than the other ones, although still a bit sad. I hated it at first, mainly for the absolutely ridiculous chorus, but it's grown on me. (And don't tell me about the generic drumming - I KNOW ;) )

And RSE is a MUST if you are to hear the songs the way I hear them... What If contains some wah-wah parts that are impossible to re-create with MIDI.

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 03:31 PM
Another crit, here we go!
Starts off with an evil riff over a skank beat, kind of generic, but still nice. Like the guitars playing complementing riffs at at 8, pretty nice. Verse features some nice bass riffing over palmuted riffing, sounds nice, although more interesting guitarr riffing in this part would be nicer, then it comes a nice melodic break and a reintro, stll nice, not tiring at all. Then it comes the verse riff again. I like the use of 7/4 in the Instrumental part, and the epic riffing that follows, pretty awesome. The guitar solo is pretty nice, I like the fact that is kind of a "guitar battle", in my band we do that alot, it sounds and it is fun. The second solo starts with mindless sweeping and then it changes into pentatonic-like rape, wich is pretty cool. The first riff repeats for the third time, it's getting kind of bored again, but then it comes the verse riff again, with a badass decrescendo into an epic string section. Like it alot, but why is it so low in the mix? I cranked the ****ers up and relistened to a couple of riff and the piano and strings really complement the riffing, kind of like Fleshgod Apocalypse's new album. Now, back to the string section. Then it comes the piano, sounds really atmospheric and epic when the other set of strings come in. The riff that follows is pretty awesome, generic, but hey, who cares. The melody changes in 135, and it sounds really good, reminds me of epic melodeath. The next section, with the piano and clean guitar sounds so mellow and awesome, pretty nice ending.
Now I give you these songs to crit, you can choose whatever you want:
A melodic, upbeat rock song: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467762
Or
A brutal brutal death track: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467924


Thanks bro, finally someone who kinda got what I've pictured in the last part :cheers:

The octave riff before the key change in the end is NOT supposed to be the "main" idea here - it's all about the strings and piano. It's just for texture. Seems like I've mixed the strings & piano too low but as I've said, my GP is ****ed up :haha:

Zeletros
08-05-2011, 03:40 PM
My comments stands, RSE is BAD.

If you want people to really hear everything, then you must record it

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 03:45 PM
My comments stands, RSE is BAD.

If you want people to really hear everything, then you must record it

Yeah, and the RSE adjustments vary from person to person. So, for the next time, I will adjust the tracks for MIDI before posting, to avoid any inconveniences.

But for the record, I love RSE. Just so you know! :)

psycho8
08-05-2011, 03:52 PM
Through Hollow Corridors is a beast! That was really good, exactly what I thought The Cascade was missing, great job! Great use of melody and a very good solo, loved the way it built in intensity, really, excellent job!
What If again was really good, although in recording of it would it maybe help emphasise the piano to have a guitar playing the same as the piano except maybe a few octaves away or maybe a fifth lower and have it down in the mix, just for recording depth purposes really, but overall they are both very very good tracks, I would more than likely buy, or at least download, an album with tracks like that. Given those tracks as context I can see where The Cascade came from but I still feel it is a weaker track on the whole. It makes more sense than it did on its own and I feel it would work as it will lead very nicely into What If however it isn't up to the other track's standards IMO.
Great job though!

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 04:00 PM
Through Hollow Corridors is a beast! That was really good, exactly what I thought The Cascade was missing, great job! Great use of melody and a very good solo, loved the way it built in intensity, really, excellent job!
What If again was really good, although in recording of it would it maybe help emphasise the piano to have a guitar playing the same as the piano except maybe a few octaves away or maybe a fifth lower and have it down in the mix, just for recording depth purposes really, but overall they are both very very good tracks, I would more than likely buy, or at least download, an album with tracks like that. Given those tracks as context I can see where The Cascade came from but I still feel it is a weaker track on the whole. It makes more sense than it did on its own and I feel it would work as it will lead very nicely into What If however it isn't up to the other track's standards IMO.
Great job though!

Woah thanks! The Cascade is my personal favorite out of everything I've written but I guess I'm not the one to judge, eh? ;) Through Hollow Corridors is probably one of those love/hate songs, I'm personally very proud of it (it was pretty damn difficult to write...) but I can see some people bash the shit out of it. Glad you liked it though

Funny thing is that I've considered making the guitar play the "chorus melody" in What If as well, just haven't gotten around to writing down. Too lazy I guess.

Oh, and something that lifts all these song to new heights is of course the vocal delivery, but throughout the album, there is about 70% growling, so I haven't bothered to write them into the tracks.

I consider posting the entire album in a separate thread, if anyone is interested to hear it. Metal with influences from both death, progressive, power, alternative, traditional, you name it. Even some post rock-ish stuff thrown in for good measure.

psycho8
08-05-2011, 04:09 PM
I'd probably give it a listen, definitely. Now you just need to develop the skills to play it ;p And in terms of judging what is good I always say to play/write/record what you feel and what you want, don't worry about what people think, just make sure it's what you wanted to do, which is why I can't write anything, I'm a perfectionist so nothing ever sounds good enough ;p
But seriously, keep it up, if you learn to play like that we could hear big things in the future :)

GU5T4V
08-05-2011, 04:26 PM
I'd probably give it a listen, definitely. Now you just need to develop the skills to play it ;p And in terms of judging what is good I always say to play/write/record what you feel and what you want, don't worry about what people think, just make sure it's what you wanted to do, which is why I can't write anything, I'm a perfectionist so nothing ever sounds good enough ;p
But seriously, keep it up, if you learn to play like that we could hear big things in the future :)


Great, then I'm posting the entire thing in a few moments.

If someone would feel like commenting this song any further, then please do so in this thread (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1467949)