Heavy Pop C4C! FFO ADTR


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TheBigProjekt
09-17-2011, 02:37 PM
As the title says, it's a kind of pop mosh style of music for my new band; it's very A Day to Remember-like. I'll gladly C4C with you if you leave a crit and a link!

Thanks!

EDIT: Well, shit. I always seem to do that ;-;

~Flounder~
09-17-2011, 02:52 PM
i dont see any attachments

Mean Mr Mustard
09-17-2011, 03:18 PM
Okay keep in mind that I only enjoy a very small amount of elements of ADTR's music.

Anyways, as critting as I go:
The intro was good. Familiar chord progression though, but catchy octave melody overtop. I think that when the octaves have that eighth note pauses, the rhythm guitar should follow that same rhythm, same with the bass and drums.

Now the next part, 18-49, didn't really do much for me. Personally I think it lasted way too long, not to mention that its just the same chord progression from the intro, with nothing new added. I guess with a catchy vocal melody it would be okay though, but it's hard to hear how that part would sound now since its just the guitars playing powerchords.

Starting at bar 50, that next part is okay, but I really think you should make bar 51 syncopated as it leads into the C5 powerchord. It segues decently back into the intro section then (I guess its a chorus)

The metalcore riff at bar 74 was decent, it was a bit generic, but I guess it sounded a bit happy, so it worked with the song. The harmony was good too, but personally Id have the harmony come in on the second time and just play through that riff twice, four times seems a bit too much.

The breakdown wasn't anything amazing really, but I didn't like that bend the one guitar does. Try to find another note there, it sounds a bit weak. Decent ending then.

Could you C4C with one of the songs in my sig?

frankibo
09-18-2011, 09:07 AM
I'll give you the option of two critiques here.
1) There's not much to say apart from that this could be an ADTR song. If that's what you're going for, well done. Intro is generic as but does the job, it's nice an catchy. Verse is dull but upbeat, nothing vocals can't fix. The other riffs are decent, breakdown is a breakdown.
2) If I was to crit this as an original piece though, it's terrible, there's a complete lack of creativity and originality. Sounds like 3 ADTR songs mashed together.

Hope you can see where I'm coming from with these two critiques, depends what you were aiming for when you wrote the piece.

C4C? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=28084614#post28084614