Trouble with vocalist


View Full Version : Trouble with vocalist

04-20-2006, 04:53 PM
Ok, so me(guitar) and a friend of mine who plays drums have been practicing for about 8 months working on material. And we got his girlfriend to do vocals for us because she is an awsome vocalist and a very good writer, but it seems like shes taking to much control over everything. I mean the music is coming along well but it just doesn't seem like such a good idea giver her so much say-so in the arranging and what not. Any suggestions?

04-20-2006, 05:01 PM
you should just sit down and talk with her and tell her that you feel like she is being too bossy and she needs to chill.

04-20-2006, 05:04 PM
give her a slap!

When you think about it that is a good thing in a way because somebody needs to take charge, i mean in my band no one does and at practices we find ourselves stood there not knowing what to play next. But if you don't like it just talk to her.

04-20-2006, 05:10 PM
f*ck the heck out of her and show her who'se boss!

04-20-2006, 05:15 PM
f*ck the heck out of her and show her who'se boss!

Yeah do that first then if that doesn't work SLAP HER!

04-20-2006, 05:16 PM
What type of privileges does she afford you and your drummer, in the creation process? Sounds like you feel somewhat limited. Does your drummer have the same problem, with the current situation? Try being more upfront with your ideas, but still try to keep face. If she reacts badly with your contributions, it's time to pull the band aside and disarm any rising tension before it spirals out of control.

On the other hand, she may (might?) be a control freak, but she could possibly have an ear for (good) music.


04-20-2006, 05:26 PM
Let her know what's what. Just because she is the vocalist doesn't necassarily mean she is now the "Frontman".

04-20-2006, 05:44 PM
Well I am extremely pleased with the music we have produced. And as for the creation process we all give our opinions of what each other are playing but its like she has to make things sound closer to what she likes. And I also wanted to do a softer song with the classical guitar; almost like an Opeth sort of thing. And I have almost all of the material for that song finished but she's like "Oh, we'll work on it in a little while," butwe never get around to it. I'm thinking maybe it's because there will be no vocals in it. Idk.

Ha, I like Jew's idea.

04-20-2006, 06:25 PM
ya might wanna talk to her about her attitude, vocalists (especially if they're the only one in the band) often have lsd (lead singer disease) where they have to be in the spotlight ALL the time.... and that can totally kill the mood..... if need be why not let her sing something ethereal to it, chanting , something to add texture but not really any words? but definately i wouldn't recommend letting any one person take control, it should be a give and take relationship, let everyone get their 2 cents in and in the end do whats best for the MUSIC

04-20-2006, 06:47 PM
was she part of the starting line up for the band? because if she wasn't just tell her she's replaceable
that worked for me...

04-20-2006, 06:50 PM
yeah you could always tell her she was replaceable......

04-21-2006, 02:40 AM
She was sort of in the beginning line-up. The drummer and I have jammed off and on with each other for almost a year and a half. But when we actually decided to start a band she was there. I mean she has a really good ear for music and she knows her stuff, it's just that I'm afraid this will lead to a major power struggle in the future. I mean, what if her musical tastes start to change? The area I live in (southern Louisiana) isn't populated by a lot talented/committed people. I'm thinking more along the lines of what this attitude may do in the long-run. And don't get me wrong she is a very nice person, I'm just not sure if what she is doing will have a postitive effect on us as a band.

04-21-2006, 04:49 AM
long story short - got a female singer a9 always a no-no ) she dated our male lead singer, she broke up, convinced us to kick him out, she took complete control when she began dating the guitarist, she ruined the sound and feel of the band, and the band lost the best bassist they ever had that they did not have to pay for jamming a session ( me ) and their best drummer ever

Dead God In Me
04-21-2006, 01:43 PM
Talk to her...try and just have a mature conversation about it.

04-21-2006, 03:01 PM
Well you have to realize that as the person singing, she's generally going to have a say so in what she sings. I mean it's about compromises. You've got to realize that if she changes it t's because it's what she needs to do to sing it.

04-23-2006, 08:52 PM
The singer in my band is the same way. He hates it when the rest of us like an idea and he doesn't want to go along with it. But if most of us like it, we're going to do it. If she's the only person that wants to do what she wants to do, then you kick her ass out of that band because you don't need that **** slowing you down. Maybe it's the same for you, but every girl I know has ****ty taste in music anyway.

04-23-2006, 09:39 PM
She does have good taste in music. What I'm going to do is sit everyone down and speak what's on my mind. If she doesn't like it, either she's gone or I'm gone. I mean there are plenty of other drummers for me to jam with. But the thing is that me and our current drummer have been jamming for a long time and we understand what each other is trying to do really well.

04-23-2006, 10:05 PM
Be open and talk to her about it. If you and your drummer have a problem with her being a control freak, try to reach a compromise with her.

04-23-2006, 11:00 PM
She needs to understand that a band is ABOUT compromise. Nobody gets what they want all the time. If they did, it wouldn't be a band.

04-24-2006, 04:02 AM
Oh No Yoko.

04-24-2006, 02:12 PM
Maybe it's the same for you, but every girl I know has ****ty taste in music anyway.

I would honestly agree with that. So does every guy I know too.

I can relate to why your singer isn't very happy about an instrumental, maybve she'll take it better if it becomes a set opening song, and a one off...