Dante vrs. Iron X Maiden


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DanteR*
07-06-2006, 12:39 AM
"Still"

A ceramic entity,
Passive and placid
Restrained by a cord,
An umbilical embargo
Clarify the beaten path,
And open up your ample eyes

Judas kissed your neck,
And told you not to fret

Another cracked halo,
Splitting at the seams
One last resonant tear,
Tranquility ensues

Your life, your noose, your umbra

Emitting unfathomable words
Assuring me of your cascade
I wish I could have met you,
In the flesh
A faded heir,
Leon now,
Lies still


Biohazard

Let your mind wander just don't let it get too far.
If it wanders down the wrong road you may lose it after all.

I?m on the brink of sanity, don?t push me past the line,
I?m searching for the antidote but running out of time.

I'm a biohazard to mankind,
way past being out of my head let alone my mind.
I'm a walking distaster, just a child gone wrong.
It's hard to pick yourself up after being down for so long.

I try to be a good boy, you tell me to swallow my pride,
What happens when I choke on it? So **** that, nice try.

I?m told to take the right path, but believe me, that?s no good,
I always end up late for class and never end up where I should.

Im a biohazard to mankind,
way past being out of my head let alone my mind.
I?m a walking disaster,
just a punk with no friends...
and it?s all my fault if I?m ****ed up in the end.

I?m a time bomb and my zero?s growing near,
I?m a biohazard, so you?d better steer clear.

Final
07-06-2006, 01:03 AM
First.

DeliriumTrigger
07-06-2006, 01:05 AM
I like the first one better as well, but I'd suggest using fewer "big" words.

Final
07-06-2006, 01:10 AM
^None of those should be considered as "big" words.:rolleyes:

Jammydude44
07-06-2006, 12:29 PM
First one :)

DeliriumTrigger
07-06-2006, 06:01 PM
^None of those should be considered as "big" words.:rolleyes:

Obviously, but it seems as though he's trying to use more complex, less common words just to make them seem poetic.

DanteR*
07-08-2006, 10:57 PM
Alright, this one on one match is wrapping up... any final votes?