Trigster versus Dante version 3.0


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DanteR*
07-23-2006, 01:22 AM
Alright, Mike decided he wanted to get beat by another of my pieces again ;) , so he wrote a haibun (short piece of prose followed by haiku) and I wrote my usual song... enjoy, and vote away.

Now, Now, Child please don?t fret
Go play on your Styrofoam slide,
Next to the synthetic swing set
Open up your porcelain eyes
Precious, we painted your world
To protect you, now realize

This is all a fašade

The FCC?s your father,
The world is now rated ?G?
Never mind the obscurity,
This false sense of protection

Quit dressing life?s window
With pearl coated prizes
You're setting out a welcome mat
in front of an opium wasteland
Only to discard it in a
Hefty garbage bag

The FCC?s your father,
The world is now rated ?G?
Never mind the obscurity,
This false sense of protection

Now, Now, Child don?t be scared,
Go sleep in your marshmallow bed
Next to the silicone statue
Soon, apples will turn deep red,
And, you will walk out into the world,
Unknown and undefined,

Your childhood is a fašade

I woke to the breeze escaping windmills, strolling through the backyard trees into carnivorous crevices of rock. I climbed the blind streets of God's lightning and cloud into a gaze of painful pines with far-reaching Brooklyn 'scapes. Peering into the hole of missing site and city I found my lost forgotten love; Where families take pictures on makeshift benches and hikers find virtue in hidden paths selfishly made for themselves. Where couples kiss in discovered love and boyscouts stare at starlit skies. Where the wild are fearless, never seeing sorrow, and birds never miss a morning.

A city's smog can
never meet love and life like
I met them today.

TrigFunction
07-23-2006, 02:00 AM
ha psh psh sooo confident huh so confident? look im doing good already its 0-0

good luck anyway :P

a-user-name
07-23-2006, 02:17 AM
I voted green, I love that song... very good

lawloganza
07-23-2006, 02:37 AM
hard choice, dante's is definitely one of the best songs I've seen here but I'm afraid I'm more partial to prose, both very good pieces though. so ya, blueizzle for the winizzle

Jammydude44
07-23-2006, 06:27 AM
Haha.. Green :)

pwrchrdprincess
07-23-2006, 09:51 PM
I'm feeling the blue.

Final
07-24-2006, 01:25 AM
Second.

DanteR*
07-25-2006, 10:24 PM
Alright, this match is coming to a close and I was wondering if their were any deciding votes...

TrigFunction
07-26-2006, 03:38 AM
now that was a match danter :P