ptb another metalcore thing that i need help on yah. (c4c)


View Full Version : ptb another metalcore thing that i need help on yah. (c4c)

10-29-2006, 10:07 PM
Yeah, i just want to know if that second riff is retarded?

and is there a transition needed? like, is it way too sudden?

thanks, ill crit yours too

10-29-2006, 10:37 PM
I think it's fine the way it is, and could definately become a kickass song when it's done.
Link's in sig.

10-29-2006, 11:37 PM
What you have sounds good.
But you dont have much, so update us ASAP.

10-29-2006, 11:54 PM
i think you abused the open d i guess. the melodic parts sound good though.

10-30-2006, 04:40 PM
^ i agree the open thing is a little over done, it sounded cool for a little bit then it just kept on going. The intro riffs were really good though, especially with the harmonized melodies. Finish it, it has potential!

11-24-2006, 04:31 PM
The high harmonized part that's all over the song doesn't say much to me and sounds too optimistic but it's sort of memorable. I like the rest of it though; the dropped D parts have interesting enough rhythms to work.

11-24-2006, 07:34 PM
this will sound insane with drums cuz the rhythm is intricate, i think everything was fine except for that lick at the beginning, i donno it seems unnecessary to me. Throw in a solo after what you have so far and this will be very sick! gj so far

here is a link to mine

Fatt Sorum
11-25-2006, 02:36 AM
sounds fine, just feel free to change chords at the end part :haha
i like the melodic thing, it sounded great

crit mine? (in sig)

Nunwhxre 666
11-25-2006, 02:54 AM
Really good. I just think the very first measure needs to be harmonized or something. Because the one guitar just playing the 6-8 thing sounds weird. Other than that, besides being very generic, it was a good sounding peice.

If you get a chance, crit one of mine?

11-25-2006, 03:16 AM
Really didn't like the intro, but after 20 seconds it got a bit better.. I'm not a metalcore fan, tho. Try to add some originality to the piece and it'll sound better.


Needs work but shows some potential (the 2nd riff). Crit mine plx.

11-25-2006, 01:05 PM
i loved bars 6-10