LOOKtheskyfell! vs stratkat


PDA

View Full Version : LOOKtheskyfell! vs stratkat


stratkat
11-28-2006, 06:36 PM
poem vs. poem for 2 pts. (second one is a poem)

"Frozen in Feelings"

I won't melt the icy numbness
with the thoughts of you
So that I can hide these feelings
that I've succumbed to
Ive hidden in the ice for so long
and I won't give up anytime soon

I want to feel warm once again
kill to feel anything at all
I want to feel the scorch of love
I havn't felt since it was fall
Her words ripped through me like daggers
words that made me feel two inches tall

Melt my heart thats covered in ice
with the fire in your bright eyes
Use the liquid to shed some tears
No more can I disquise these fears
Please be strong and try not to cry
you froze my feelings with your last good-bye



June 5th, The*Fattest Day*Of The Year***********************************
*
She said she was about to take off her top, and my heart just couldn’t stop, no as the clock ticked and tocked, the keys remained locked in a chest full of half-remembered poems and baby’s breath which I think, if I remember correctly, was your favorite flower…
*
…No, wait, never mind that was what I bought you on that birthday when you moved away, going to a prettier place and a bluer sky which shields you from my imprisoning eyes that capture and detain every emotion that remains in your heart when it comes to that spark that led to a night of intimacy that even I could remember. That night only lasted a little while, but its effects will last forever…
*
…I’ve always wondered what you wrote in your diary when you got home after that intense session of physical connection and emotional misconceptions. We would’ve had the world in our hands if our hands weren’t in naughty places they shouldn’t have been, but our better instincts continued to give in to something you swore off and something I adored, kinky and raunchy sex that restored that broken chord that was ignored by the hoard of everyone other than the one’s involved…
*
…I wrote something simple in my journal after all that, I wrote a sentence or two about the blue skies and the imprisoning lies that continue to be on my mind day after day, night after time. I wrote two lines for everyone to see. “She asked me what I was wearing, and I said my heart on my sleeve. She was wearing the same thing and that’s how she stole me.”

Dæmönika
11-28-2006, 06:38 PM
Isn't the second one prose? I'm not comfortable with choosing between one or the other, but for the sake of the poll, second.

stratkat
11-28-2006, 07:21 PM
It is kind of a prose, I should have looked, it said poem when he sent the pm. :confused:

LOOKtheskyfell!
11-28-2006, 07:23 PM
No. It is definitely a poem, just with interesting structure.

Anywho, my vote goes to the first. :)

Final
11-29-2006, 01:54 AM
Second, easily.

Jammydude44
11-29-2006, 04:13 AM
Second

#1 synth
11-29-2006, 11:02 AM
LOOKi'mvotingfor2!

stratkat
11-29-2006, 05:45 PM
It looks like I'm gonna lose the two points I just got :( , oh well you win some you lose some :p: . Great job on your poem LOOKtheskyfell!, I enjoyed reading it :D

guitarsuperman2
11-30-2006, 01:12 PM
i voted first one