End Of Civilisation [Metal, GP, Midi]


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ch715dallat
05-29-2007, 11:10 AM
Finnaly Ive got this arranged and finished in a way that im somewhat happy with it. phew. After three completely different layouts and manys a solo ive got something thats decent and i can start to perfect.

Anyhoo theres one main solo now rather than 2 ****ty ones and i took teh outro solo from the last one for this as its decent enough as an outro. I just need to make the drums a bit more interesting and varied then its time to record :)

But before then gimme your verdict on it and places that can be improved or scrapped or changed or whatever. be honest and bear in mind ive already said about teh drums. ;)

Also at the end of the solo i have left 2 bars before the next riff i want to know is it better if it just jumps straight back into the riffs or should i keep that gap?

C4C

:cheers:

Edit: That bit in the solo is tapping btw I dont have fingers that long ;)

RECORDING IS NOW UP HERE (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=9414293#post9414293)

ClosedCasket
05-29-2007, 01:29 PM
That was pretty cool!

Riffs 3 & 5 were my favourites, but the rest were good. Some heavier bits would probably be good, but still. The solos were really good as well, really melodic and tasteful.

Nice one!

ch715dallat
05-29-2007, 01:51 PM
^ Thanks alot man ;) im suprised u said riff 3 as that would be the one i wasnt sure about but yeah thanks :cheers: i wanted to put some heavier bits into it but i couldnt think of anything and i didnt want to force it so, maybe ill come up with something later in the week but im settling for this at the moment.

lonejedio5
05-29-2007, 04:08 PM
Hmm, I liked the riff at around bar 3, but the following one I didnt like so much.
I think the highlight of this song was the tapping solo. But I gotta be honest, most of it is just a tad boring. I deff. liked Riff 6. I'm gonna have to say that the second distortion guitar wasnt doing much for me. I actually changed the guitar to a bass and had guitar pro transcribe it onto 4 strings, you should try listening to it that way. I deff. gotta say I liked it more when the bass played those guitar parts. It gives the song a more diverse feel to it.
Overall it was pretty good.
8/10

ch715dallat
05-29-2007, 04:30 PM
:confused:

i dont play bass so i dunno why i would do that and why would i play the whole song on bass with no guitar :confused:

i thought it was alright, im sorry you found it boring :( it sounds better on recordings tho

b101
05-29-2007, 05:45 PM
right - overall i'd go with 6/10, reasons being:

Good:

- after (and including) the solo was brilliant; very much liked riff 5 and especially the way the drums were nice and calm as a sort of prelude to the heavy part - nice

- the solo itself was good, especially the tapping part. Only criticism i could make is that the part of the solo immediately following the tapping part was a bit weak - bland...the solo deserved to end on a high bent note then the other rhythm guitar coming in behind that note with riff 5. Otherwise good

- the drums (once you lower the volume to 14) are brilliant, work very well everywhere and are sufficiently complex to keep you interested. Good work.

The not so good (not necessarily bad, but needs improvement):

- Before the solo it gets a bit repetitive. Move up the scale a bit, keep the listener guessing to an extent. They shouldn't be able to predict every bar that's coming (the reason why i liked riff 5 so much after the solo, nice unexpected twist.

- the second guitar was just dull tbh. Unless you have a really bad rhythm guitarist, spice it up a bit. Harmonise the bridge in thirds for example. Introduce some different rhythms and add some palm muting at different points, just make it less samey.

(I've uploaded a slightly altered version - listen to the rhythm part under the tapping solo - didn't take long but it sounds different, see what you think.)

Hope this helps - it's not bad by any means but could just use some tweaking :)

H(i)SS
05-29-2007, 07:38 PM
- the solo itself was good, especially the tapping part. Only criticism i could make is that the part of the solo immediately following the tapping part was a bit weak - bland...the solo deserved to end on a high bent note then the other rhythm guitar coming in behind that note with riff 5. Otherwise good

- Before the solo it gets a bit repetitive. Move up the scale a bit, keep the listener guessing to an extent. They shouldn't be able to predict every bar that's coming (the reason why i liked riff 5 so much after the solo, nice unexpected twist.

- the second guitar was just dull tbh. Unless you have a really bad rhythm guitarist, spice it up a bit. Harmonise the bridge in thirds for example. Introduce some different rhythms and add some palm muting at different points, just make it less samey.


+1 to all of those
and IMO you should keep the little pause after the solo
pretty good though

ch715dallat
05-29-2007, 07:47 PM
(I've uploaded a slightly altered version - listen to the rhythm part under the tapping solo - didn't take long but it sounds different, see what you think.)

Hope this helps - it's not bad by any means but could just use some tweaking :)

I'm not in a band therefore the rhythm guitarist is just as bad as teh lead guitarist ;) i just never really bothered much with the rhythm as i thought the lead riffs were interesting enough and i didnt want to take away from them with complicated rhythm guiatr :confused: but ill check out your version ;)

I'll try have a look at the areas you talked about, i'd love to see your altered version but :( i only got version 5.0, could you extract it as version 4 for me? :cheers:

or someone with that version do it for me?

b101
05-29-2007, 08:25 PM
here you are

ch715dallat
05-29-2007, 08:39 PM
^Thats pretty cool il swap it around the chords you used but it sounds good :cheers:

i was just wondering what i could do to teh start to make it less 'predictable' as you put it ?

thanks

Demons&Wizards
05-30-2007, 07:35 AM
Hey thanks for listening and posting for my song.
I liked this piece a lot, the 1st solo at bars 47 and 48 is really cool.
I think maybe it could be a little heavier, but that prob depends what ur into.
keep up the good work.

Coins
05-30-2007, 08:00 AM
I agree with all of the good points that everyone has said here, but to me the biggest problem is that it sounds very repetitive.

The solo is pretty cool, but lose that bend in bar 56 and use vibrato instead.

ch715dallat
05-30-2007, 01:46 PM
its more interesting on recordings so ill record it tomorrow and see what you guys think ;) and ill kill that bend there ;)

Egrodyne
05-30-2007, 05:21 PM
I dont have GP however i listened to the midi.....

It flows very well indeed though some of chords i feel could be played with, suspended/more bass notes in the chords... Got some riff's that sound like they could be skull crushingly worthy through an amp though!

I couldn't hear the solo's though! seemed really muted in the midi... :confused:

ch715dallat
05-30-2007, 05:43 PM
thanks man, its definitely alot heavier through an amp i dunno why you couldnt hear the solo? it was hard panned to the right maybe your fight speaker is a bit bust? i dunno. but thanks alot ;)

onebetter
05-31-2007, 02:37 PM
Yeah, like a lot of people said, The lead was excellent and the drums were excellent, but the rhythm guitar was pretty bland. You basically write in the exact opposite way that I do. It sounds like you wrote some really good leads then put some simple rhythms under it just to fill up space. I think just a little more variation under the lead would be good. Other than that, though, great piece.

ch715dallat
05-31-2007, 03:34 PM
Thanks man, i knwo the rhythm isnt that interesting but you dont notice that in the recording, it really just there to back up the lead and give it a fuller sound. check out the recording in the thread i posted at the top you'll see ;) and yeah i always write the lead riffs first then worry about the rhythm. :haha

you got anything for me to crit?

Phill-Rock
06-02-2007, 04:50 PM
I just listened to the recording on myspace and had a look at the guitarpro and i gott a say I'm impressed. I would add a faster, more complex riff but other than that it was really good, and I loved most of the drumwork.

I'll have stuff up after I get my recording equipment in August.

ch715dallat
06-02-2007, 09:31 PM
I'll look forward to it ;)

i just downloaded Acoustica Beatcraft so the drums in the recording will be alot beter as everyone keeps complaining about them, im also getting reason for some of my pieces with synth and stuff.

I got cubase but IMO its crap and im very happy i pirated because i would have commited suicide if i had paid all that money for it because the mixdowns are ****e, audacity somehow makes them sooooo much clearer when converting to MP3 :haha so Audacity it is from now on ;)

IRELAND FTW

*just thought id get that out there ;)*

Csquared1001
06-21-2007, 02:14 PM
nice chord progressions well more like intervals but still quite good. not a fan of the solo but it is still better than most on here and i know how tough solo **** is on GP5[to put it on].
some of the resolutions left me hanging like the one before the first riff or verse or whatever.
still. good job

vinguler
06-25-2007, 03:36 PM
I really liked the song.
in my opinion there's no problem with it,
except its too reptitive in few places.

anyways, cool song, 9/10.
_____________

Be Sure To Crit My Songs:

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=610914
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=610914
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=610917

duncang
06-25-2007, 05:50 PM
Considering it's only 3 tracks you've got a decent thick sound. Add some bass and that'll sound lovely. The riffs were pretty generic overall, sounds like you're just doing the classic root-5th-augmented 5th thing that most people think up when they go "right, I'm gonna write some metal!". It sounds alright though, solos really good, liking that. One thing about the drums also, you don't need that many fills! Seriously! Too many fills just kinda ruin it, keep the beat a bit more.

At bar 92 the guitars clashed badly. G# + A = DO NOT WANT.

In general perhaps give the 2nd guitar some more interesting rhythms. Overall it was decent, definite areas to be improved though.


Crit for crit

This (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=610825) or this (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=610829)

:cheers:

hzac
06-25-2007, 09:00 PM
First off.. let me say i enjoyed your song.

The intro with the drums could of been a bit smoother but.. it seems jolted. But that might jsut be me :P. This song actually reminds of hanger 18 by megadeth for some reason.. take that as a compliemnt lol

The solos were fantastic and well wirrten but my favourite part of the song would of have to been the bridge and the tapping part. keep up the goo dwork

Im jsut about to check out the recording :P

please crit mine
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=614140

ch715dallat
06-26-2007, 09:32 AM
^ got yours ages ago man ;)

anyways thanks guys

:cheers:

psychotim
06-28-2007, 11:21 AM
Riff1:
Calm and good feal, i liked it.

Riff2:
Realy cool with the soft drums first before you kick in on riff2.1

Riff3:
Yeah this riff is also pretty cool.

Bridge:
Gotta be honest, i didnt realy like it. just the wrong progression for me.

Solo:
Loved your runs in the solo, but the other stuff there was just ok, not bad, but ok.
The tapping was sweet thou.
I didnt like the ending note, it was kinda wierd.

Riff5:
Yeah its an ok riff, nothin to special.

Riff6:
Feels like theres missing something at the 4th bar there.
Other then that its good.

Riff1.3:
The 4 last bars sounds a little out of tune.

Outro:
Your note lengths are a little wierd to me, same with the solo.
So i dont get that in to it.

guitarguy5515
06-29-2007, 06:43 PM
My beliefs on the song have been summed up already. The drums kind of annoyed me. Really. I liked riffs 3 and 5. The solos were awesome man. Keep up the work.

Albarranator
06-30-2007, 03:06 PM
WOW! Amazing work man! Really liked it. The solo was just great, but the tapping section was better. When I see this kind of works I realize that I have a long way to walk before being a good musician. Congratulations

Telestar
07-04-2007, 05:14 PM
Riff 5 is by far to me the best part of the song. It sounds minor, then happy, then cool. I bet some vocal sound awesome. I think this song is perfect. 10/10

willywonker
07-06-2007, 09:34 AM
fave riff was 2.1, otherwise awesum stuff...how long did it take you, i mean lyk puttin it all together??

ch715dallat
07-06-2007, 02:30 PM
the riffs a couple of hours but that was just thinking of stuff. then the solo i had a crap one then the next day i rewrote it to this so 2days? but thats just doin bits and pieces here and there.