[GP4,GP5,MIDI]Yutimium (RHCP inspired)
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06-04-2007, 06:26 PM
Well.....here it goes, another "improvised" song of mine :haha
I did the bassline a while ago (RHCP inspired obviously,....as the title says :rolleyes: ) and the guitar on top of it (the drums are pretty basic so they came along)....
Then I made the chorus (I kind of like the bassline........)...... the bassline was improvised too........and then I added the guitar :)
(I didn't do the solo yet cause I didn't want to bring the song down with my "improvised" solos :haha )
06-04-2007, 08:46 PM
Anyway.....just finished the song...
I don't think the solo is that bad (I just realized how fun is to solo in the major pentatonic :p: )....but the outro may get a little weird with the bass specially.....
I made this song pretty quickly.....like in 3 or 4 hours....wow....its a record for me :haha
(Of course crits are welcomed :) )
06-04-2007, 09:11 PM
Wow! I really enjoyed that! Huh... it was... unexpected!
Awsome work, man. Aside from the painful lack of variation (inducing boredom by the second verse) and the annoying bends and impossible high notes in the solo... it was excellent throughout.
Go back... pretend you are writing for your own album and level it as high as you can get it... variaty, harmony, off-times and a better drum line...
I think this CAN be great. Do yourself a favor and get it down!
Again, awsome work, dude.
06-04-2007, 09:24 PM
pretty much the same as LEO the bends are weird but thats probably due to GP they probably sound fine in real life. the solo wasnt overly impressive it seemed you forced it and it seemed to be different licks just pasted to gether with bends. maybe start the solo again when youre sat down with your guitar and take time over it to make something memorable ;) as the song is good. especially the funky bassline.
basslines seem to be your specialty ;)
06-04-2007, 09:37 PM
Thanks for the crits :D...........
Yeah, the solo has some kind of weird bends in there :haha , I may start it again tomorrow maybe....as my acoustic has only to 20 frets....its kind of impossible for me to play those high notes.....so I invented something in GP :haha .
I guess I could work in it a little more....I don't lose anything :D
I think it is supposed to have vocals......but maybe I could add variation to the pre-chorus instead.......
I don't know about the basslines........cause if I want to get a good bassline I usually get it (even when I first started here people told me I had good basslines)..........I don't know...... :p: ....maybe I should be a bassist :p: .....well, thats the second thing I want to do after playing guitar....
06-04-2007, 09:50 PM
also what do all your song names mean? are they actual words? :haha
06-04-2007, 10:00 PM
Aside from "Collection of RPGs" and "Medieval Song" I don't think any of them form words :haha
I just take random words (like techno.....uranium :p: ; etc.) and add ium.....or just invent something in the moment I'm posting it :p:
06-04-2007, 10:26 PM
06-04-2007, 10:33 PM
Let me put it this way. The song sounds a lot better when you mute the guitar.
You have knack for the bass and writing basslines, but I just wasn't feeling the guitar at all, especially those weird bends. I think almost all of the guitar lines would need to be redone, imo.
Of course, keep in mind I'm not a RHCP fan so what appeals to me might not appeal to the kind of audience you would like, but still yet. Basslines were cool though, nice job with that. :)
06-04-2007, 10:43 PM
^^Thanks for the crit :cheers:
Well.....I did the guitar to add a nice combo with the bassline.....(at least the verse and chorus)......at least I made it kind of similar to one RHCP song.
Well.....at times I messed up with those bends and as they sounded kind of cool I left them :haha
The solo was kind of weird (the bends at least)....although I liked the licks .
The bass was kind of improvised....I used the major scale and tried and soon I got the bassline and kept it (for both the verse and chorus....now I made another bassline for the bridge which I think is sweet too :) )
Meh.....I think I will cut down the outro as it doesn't fit and I will change the solo (I already did some changes to the drums (kind of) and to the pre-choruses....and bridge).....
06-04-2007, 10:52 PM
I liked the bend on the 5th fret in the outro. It fit.
LoL that was almost it as far as guitar goes for me. Oh, and the chords in the verse (0-0-3-5 and 0-0-3-3).
06-06-2007, 08:14 PM
I made each Pre-Chorus different from each other (I'm not much convinced about the second one....)
I made some changs to the drums.......I cutt off the whole outro and ended it in a Dm instead.
I remade the solo today (which I think is kind of cool...slow at first and nice in the end...) and added a bridge after it.....although I think the solo doesn't sound as good as it should at parts, maybe you could point them out....
Well, thats it for now...I dont remember doing anything else (the chorus and verses are perfectly fine)....
So tell me what you think please..... :)
EDIT:Ooppss.......I just found the thing that was wrong in the solo (well, I don't want to post it again so I'll tell ya :p: ) :
-in the 54 bar.....the 8 fret with bend and 6 fret of the 2nd string should be replaced with 7 fret bend and 5 fret of the 3rd string....trust me, it sounds better (the bend remains the same......)
06-07-2007, 11:07 PM
yup the new solo is much better ;) the end was very nice sometimes it went too slow like in the middle of it. i know its good to have slow bits but when you do, you have to make them a bit more melodic ;) but nice work overall
That was damn, damn funky! 10/10
06-08-2007, 01:32 PM
Un-relenting! It's so awesome, lol. Full of funk! That bassline in the beginning is sick. :)
I really liked the chorus (The muted guitar was sweet, very RCHP)
9.5/10 almost perfect!
06-08-2007, 03:31 PM
Thanks for the crits :D
06-08-2007, 03:32 PM
Hmmm, this is nice. :) Really nice. I very like the bassline, it has this funky feel of RHCP. It gets a little bit repetitive for me in the pre-chorus, but it's soo funky that i doesn't get annoying. Long, but not annoying.
The chorus is okay. I like the bass in the end of it.
I didn't like the solo. IMO, it should be faster, more dynamic, just like in the end of it. (from bar 58 to 61)
The bridge is quite good, and the last pre-chorus is really nice.
So, change only the solo. :) I think, that with vocals, this song would sound really great.
Btw. Thanks for critting my song. :D I'm going to check other of your songs, because i very like this one. ;)
Btw2. Haha, crazy song names. :D
06-08-2007, 04:23 PM
^ :haha Thanks for the crit :cheers:
Well....I like the solo as it is....but what I could do is make it longer and make that new part faster and dynamic as you say...so as to have a contrast between the slow and the fast part...
06-29-2007, 06:52 PM
Lets call it different. It had a real funky jazzy vibe with the bassline and all. Very cool.
Pretty damn eccentric. I really liked the transition from the verse through to the chorus. The bends were kinda weird but thats nothin. Good job man.
06-29-2007, 11:06 PM
06-30-2007, 12:58 AM
I like the high part in the solo, but doesn't it make sense to move the notes up one string? (I.e., the "27"th fret note on the G becoming a 23rd note on the B?
When faced with the decision of moving that note, or dropping thousands on an Uli Jon Roth Custom 30 Fret guitar, I'd likely opt for the latter.
Other than that, it's good, except that with many of your songs, I feel like it's a little "noisy". The 4 note chords and stuff seem a bit unnecessary, I would opt for a triad or a diad in their place, but that aside, I have no problem with your stuff. It's your song anyway, so don't take it too seriously. I like what you have going.
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