Kicking a friend out of a band?


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12-13-2007, 06:58 PM
ok, so heres the thing: I play in a band with three of my friends from school. Me and the rhythm guitarist play great together and our drummer fits in fine, but our lead guitarist is the problem.. He's a great lead player, but his rhythm playing is sloppy and he always try to turn in a metalcore direction which we other three don't want at all. I feel like we need to let him go to progress as a band, but he is a good friend I don't wanna lose him as a friend either. I've spoken to the other guys and they feel the same way. Any suggestions?

guitar nooblet
12-13-2007, 07:01 PM
Did you tell him how you guys feel yet? that should be the first thing you do.

d3mon slay
12-13-2007, 07:01 PM
Well you just have to let him know that he is a good guitarist but he isn't right for the band

C&C Magik
12-13-2007, 07:02 PM
what guitar nooblet said.

The Mizfit
12-13-2007, 07:02 PM
The best thing to do is talk to him. Tell him what direction u 3 want to go in. if he doesn't want to play that type of music then say its better off if we part ways.

12-13-2007, 07:02 PM should just turn into metalcore.
but thats just me...

just tell him how you guys feel about what the band should be. and if he doesnt like it...ask him to change or leave.

guitar nooblet
12-13-2007, 07:03 PM
what guitar nooblet said.


12-13-2007, 07:03 PM
if he's your friend, then im sure he'll understand.

12-13-2007, 07:03 PM
you should tell him straight up how you and your bandmates feel - don't beat around the bush. then tell him that the reality is that he either needs to shape up or move along. a band is a band, and your friendship shouldn't get in the way of the progression your band. BUT that applies visa-versa as well. don't let your band f*ck up your friendships, cuz your friendships will most likely outlive your band by a long shot. just be real with him.

12-13-2007, 07:12 PM
just tell him what you think he might go fine **** you im gone or he might settle down and think about it if hes a great lead player you don't wanna let him go that quickly but if he can't get his rythem down then whats the point of keeping him. As Flaming Youth quoted "A Band Is A Band And Your Friendships Shouldn't Get In The Way Of Where You Wanna Progress To".

12-13-2007, 09:18 PM
Let him play what he wants to play mate. Seriously, that's what each of you have different influences for...

12-15-2007, 02:59 PM
i had the same problem.
i just recently kicked out my best friend out of the band.
because he was pretty much useless.
he couldnt play for ****.
i didnt know he would take it so hard.
but i had to do what i had to do, and i had no intensions of breaking our friendship.
i still talk to him but he always brings it up, and hes not the same friend as he used to be.
you really have to be careful of how you present it to him, i wasnt and look where i ended up.

12-15-2007, 03:12 PM
How close friends are you with him?
If you guys are close it shouldn't be a problem and he should understand, but make sure you tell him to his face, if you just send him a mail he'll probably think you don't care at all about him.

Patrick Curley
12-16-2007, 06:34 AM
Band politics is really hard, I've been on both sides over the years and I'd never kick anyone out now. Talk to the guy, if he's any good and wants to keep playing with you he'll go with the group thing and pursue his metalcore stuff elsewhere, otherwise he'll leave himself and be glad you had the guts to bring it up with him. The absolute worst thing you can do is keep talking about it without him, make it into something bigger than it is and then spring it on him one day when he doesn't expect it.

12-16-2007, 02:19 PM
One day, have a discussion about band/friendship and how they don't necessarily go hand in hand. Next day point out that he is not right for the band. If first talk sunk in, he will take it at face value and hopefully not show up later and kill you all.

outlaw metaler
12-17-2007, 11:54 PM
just say that you guys want to play this style and that you need to try and stay in that style

if he wants to play metalcore he is free to start his own metalcore band

12-18-2007, 08:56 PM
yay! another "how to kick X person out of my band" thread

12-19-2007, 09:51 AM
ive had to do the same thing you wont lose them as a friend but dont just say your fired give a good logical explanation