Band Conflicts


PDA

View Full Version : Band Conflicts


GravityRides
12-31-2007, 05:09 PM
So I started a successful band awhile back in august with just my drummer and I making about 5 songs to play at parties and some shows. We just recorded a demo cd spending $380 total for it. My drummer who is one of my good friends has only been playing for 8 months is starting to get this habit of playing the same beats every time we make me jams. We also recently added a bassist who isn't that bad but just has a problem in knowing what to play in making a good rythem(and has horrible tone from a 15 watt bass amp) while I have a 40 watt tube. My drummer is one of my closest friends too but yet he can be a real asshole at times and it puts us in ****ty moods to play. Practice too can be a hard thing since we all live in different areas and my drummer is the only person who drives having to pick us up in 10 mile distance.

Just right now I feel its really hard for me trying to direct this band in the way to go..Back then when it started things were much simpler just with my drummer making fun songs. But now I feel theres just a conflict in all of us that wants to say something yet we want to make music. I don't want to quit the band..I'm just tired of always telling both of my members always what to play or do because in the end i feel like an ass about it. They both don't have that much in influences in music they just "play" i've been in 3 bands with expirience and I just feel i don't fit already in a beginner band. What should I do?

hehepupitre
12-31-2007, 05:14 PM
I had the exact same problem with my band. Our drummer was great to start with but had no originality. We slowly just told him we didnt have band practice anymore, when we really did, and eventually we had to tell him that we didnt want him in the band anymore. We lost the friendship but the band is much better because he's gone.

just some guy
12-31-2007, 05:14 PM
do you have to basically teach everyone else how to do anything?

cashewchaching
12-31-2007, 05:16 PM
try jamming in three/four or something. just switch up the song style, and he'll have to follow.

Rockstar112
12-31-2007, 05:19 PM
yeah me nnd my drummer started a band. she's really good and can improvise on the spot and still sound good. I'm a pretty good guitarist and we click musically but every band memeber she suggests is a chick. now i have no problem with that but i mean don't ya think it'd be a little weird if i were the only d00d in the band?

Mccoy88f
12-31-2007, 05:24 PM
Lol well my bands fine - except we all have our lil bit of showing off stuff and end up not getting much practise in bcoz of showing of lol but besides that its great :)
TELL YOUR BASSIST TO GET A HALF DECENT AMP - sorry for the caps but u need to tell him that his amp is crap - he can pick up a half decent one for practise for about 60

And you need to stop doing all the work, it leads to problems, ask what theyd like to do :)
or play some chords on the spot and tell them to improvise --- itll help them

GravityRides
12-31-2007, 05:39 PM
do you have to basically teach everyone else how to do anything?


Thats how i feel most of the time especially with rythem its like "alright do this" "dont do that do this" and I HATE doing that. I had to do that with my drummer a little bit back then but he's decent now with improv. And since we're an instrumental band none of us can really sing yet my bassist wants to and I can barely hear him half the time and he wants to make the band "emo" which my drummer and I aren't digging at all since were an Indie Rock/jam band..just look at the lyrics on my bandspace..

www.myspace.com/behindbuildings

Aramis
12-31-2007, 05:46 PM
yeah me nnd my drummer started a band. she's really good and can improvise on the spot and still sound good. I'm a pretty good guitarist and we click musically but every band memeber she suggests is a chick. now i have no problem with that but i mean don't ya think it'd be a little weird if i were the only d00d in the band?

Not at all. There was a band in school with only one guy. It isn't strange.

just some guy
12-31-2007, 08:38 PM
I'm sorry to say this, but you need to find a new band. I was in your same situation and I regret not getting out of that band faster. I'm in a new one where EVERYBODY contributes to the writing. plus, my new band is made up intelligent people that don't do drugs anymore.

so basically...drugs are bad.

...oh yeah...and...

unresponsive band members are bad.
trying to make excuses for being in the wrong band in bad to.
so don't start doing that to yourself either.

SlackerBabbath
01-01-2008, 09:27 AM
My band used to fight constantly. There were arguments over money, who was driving the van, how much roadies got paid, how many roadies we needed, who owned what percentage of our gear, who does the most work, who manages to skive out of doing any lifting when we're loading up the truck, how much we pay ourselves and how much gets placed in the band's funds. ect.
We sorted it out by saying 'Look guys, this isn't happening as it should be anymore' and putting everything that the band had bought collectively (such as the PA system and light show) into storage and splitting up for twelve months.
When we got back together again, we swore to never play more than a couple of gigs every month or so, because rehearsing together, spending all day in a van together, travelling to the gig, and then hanging around backstage, playing the gig then going to where you are all staying for the night, together, tends to get a little monotonous, and that's when we argue.
With us, familiarity breeds contempt.

Your problem seems to be that you feel that you are putting everything into the band and everyone else is just going through the motions and simply following what you say, which musicaly and artisticaly will not be rewarding at all, let alone satisfying.
There's an old saying in music, which goes 'If you're not enjoying what you're doing, there's no point in doing it.'
It sounds to me like you need to just find some more likeminded and experienced musicans as yourself. Either that, or suck it up, and take the time to train up the guys you've got to be more like yourself.

OpposingForce
01-01-2008, 11:06 AM
My band used to fight constantly. There were arguments over money, who was driving the van, how much roadies got paid, how many roadies we needed, who owned what percentage of our gear, who does the most work, who manages to skive out of doing any lifting when we're loading up the truck, how much we pay ourselves and how much gets placed in the band's funds. ect.
We sorted it out by saying 'Look guys, this isn't happening as it should be anymore' and putting everything that the band had bought collectively (such as the PA system and light show) into storage and splitting up for twelve months.



That's why I don't do the whole thing about band's funds and buying equipment collectively. I feel (personally) that everyone should provide their own equipment that they're going to need on stage. In my last band, 3 members of the band were brothers and none of them had their own stuff (not even amplifiers for their guitars) so they used mine. I told them my stuff wasn't gonna cut it on stage (10 watt practice amps) but they wouldn't buy their own stuff, which was a major factor in our breakup a few months ago.

SlackerBabbath
01-01-2008, 11:48 AM
That's why I don't do the whole thing about band's funds and buying equipment collectively. I feel (personally) that everyone should provide their own equipment that they're going to need on stage. In my last band, 3 members of the band were brothers and none of them had their own stuff (not even amplifiers for their guitars) so they used mine. I told them my stuff wasn't gonna cut it on stage (10 watt practice amps) but they wouldn't buy their own stuff, which was a major factor in our breakup a few months ago.
True, but then stuff like lights and PA system and a van are all things that are used collectively by the band, so to be fair, they should be payed for by the band collectively.
We've sorted all our problems out now because we were all grown up enough to eventualy realise that we were all at fault, and I think the experience has made us a tighter unit because now, we're all a lot more willing to forgive each others faults and just accept that that's simply how some people are. We basicaly have a lot more patience for each other nowadays because we missed each other so much during our 12 months off, none of us want to start making waves again now.
We even have a side business hiring out our PA and lights now so that our investments are turned into profit.