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-   -   Vagina Jokes (http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1581689)

Pagan_Poetry 01-07-2013 05:03 PM

Vagina Jokes
 
Because we don't know any better.

How do vaginas like their eggs cooked?

Ovary-sy!


Sorry, I know that joke was a bit of a stretch.

UnmagicMushroom 01-07-2013 05:05 PM

What do you get when a cat falls in water?

...









...






...





A wet pussy
:haha:












:(

eGraham 01-07-2013 05:06 PM

I went to a gypsy, who was on her period, to get my fortune told. She had me stick my hand up her vagina to get the palm red.

WholeLottaIzzy 01-07-2013 05:06 PM

Baby take off your ring.

That's my watch.

Gantz92 01-07-2013 05:06 PM

Billy. Billy! The other day, I was going down on my girlfriend, I said to her, "Jeez you got a big pussy. Jeez you got a big pussy."
She said, "Why did you say that twice?" I said, "I didn't."
[Billy stares blankly]
Hawkins: See, cuz of the echo.

Zombee 01-07-2013 05:07 PM

So there was a blind man, right? And he was spillin his way down the street, right? With his stick right? Well, he wanders past a fish market, takes a deep breath, and says 'Mornin ladieesss.

SwaggleyKubrick 01-07-2013 05:09 PM

this thread seems a bit fishy.

genghisgandhi 01-07-2013 05:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by eGraham
I went to a gypsy, who was on her period, to get my fortune told. She had me stick my hand up her vagina to get the palm red.

Gypsy is an offensive term you cunt

IronMaiden76 01-07-2013 05:11 PM

I cunt take these offensive jokes

Pagan_Poetry 01-07-2013 05:12 PM

Oh I got this story!
This woman the other day said "stick your finger in my pussy!" so I did.
She then said "Now put both hands in!" so I did.
She then said "Go deeper! Go up to your wrists!" so I did.
She then said "go up to your lower arms!" so I did.
She then said "go up to your elbows!" so I did.
She then said "go up to your shoulders!" so I did.
She finally said "Okay! Clap!"
I tried and I tried, but I just couldn't separate my hands. I gave up and said "I can't clap."


She looked at me and said "Tight, isn't it?"

JackWhiteIsButts 01-07-2013 05:12 PM

Ovary is spelled with an "a".

magnus_maximus 01-07-2013 05:15 PM

Vagina jokes are never funny. Period.

Pagan_Poetry 01-07-2013 05:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JackWhiteIsButts
Ovary is spelled with an "a".



Oops. Good catch

Weaponized 01-07-2013 05:16 PM

I'd tell you one but you'd never get it.

eGraham 01-07-2013 05:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pagan_Poetry
Oops. Good catch

Twat are you talking about? Of vulva things I could've missed...

Joshua Garcia 01-07-2013 05:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by genghisgandhi
Gypsy is an offensive term you cunt

Then I better not make any jokes about it. I'm not so good at taking poundings.

CoreysMonster 01-07-2013 05:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gantz92
Billy. Billy! The other day, I was going down on my girlfriend, I said to her, "Jeez you got a big pussy. Jeez you got a big pussy."
She said, "Why did you say that twice?" I said, "I didn't."
[Billy stares blankly]
Hawkins: See, cuz of the echo.

I JUST saw that movie for the first time, on new years.

magnus_maximus 01-07-2013 05:19 PM

Gypsy isn't an offensive term. Shut up. Pikey is, but nobody likes pikeys because they're dicks.

Dregen 01-07-2013 05:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zombee
So there was a blind man, right? And he was spillin his way down the street, right? With his stick right? Well, he wanders past a fish market, takes a deep breath, and says 'Mornin ladieesss.


:haha:

fucking love that song

Tag43 01-07-2013 05:20 PM

I cant cunt how many times I've heard vagina jokes.


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