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Old 09-20-2013, 07:44 PM   #1
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Melodic Metalcore Song

This is a song I have been working on for a while now.

It's mostly done but it doesn't feel like a finished product. I've been having a mental block on how to change it or add on to it.

Anyway any comments or suggestions would be appreciated. C4C. Thanks for your input.
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Old 09-22-2013, 05:22 PM   #2
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a taaad generic to me. nothing really notable, no stand out moments, guitar solo felt weak.

when you're writing, play around a bit. change keys, use accidentals. most parts are very repetitive; take out those repeat sequences and change them up. slight variations can do more than you think in terms of flow, progression, and not boring the listener. use more varied instrumentation, or certain parts that showcase an instruments' particular qualities. use counter-melody and harmony to your advantage, and not just 3rds, or something where both guitars completely follow each other. stack chords over different registers, make them huge. mess around with polymetrics, weird/offbeat accents, syncopation...

these are just general ideas. really, if you do any of them i think the quality of the song would almost certainly improve. if you're writing for this genre of pop-metalcore, you need to do something different. i understand that you may not write a whole lot and/or may just be starting to write, which is primarily why i'm just throwing out pointers instead of going bar by bar. i think it's good you are writing, but, especially at this stage, you need to experiment. the only way you're going to develop a unique style is breaking out of your comfort zone, it's a cliché, but it's true.

please note, i'm not trying to attack you or anything, i'm just trying to help and throw out some ideas.
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Old 09-24-2013, 06:20 PM   #3
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Don't worry I did not take this as an attack. I'm fairly new to writing and the generic sound is exactly what I am trying to avoid. These are good things to look into and to experiment with, thanks for taking the time to listen and respond.
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Old 09-24-2013, 11:37 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by gametime990
Don't worry I did not take this as an attack. I'm fairly new to writing and the generic sound is exactly what I am trying to avoid. These are good things to look into and to experiment with, thanks for taking the time to listen and respond.

yeah dude, it's not a problem... it'll take awhile to get into the swing of things, just take one thing at a time, screw around with it and see how it works.

to give a personal example:

when i was first trying to stack chords, i would throw a bunch of different notes on and hope it would work. later i found out it's much better to find a general idea of what chord you want to build. like say, i find out i want to build a Cmaj7, generally all my stacked notes will either be C, E, G, or B. i'll invert or add/adjust to my liking after that. the thing is, if you use too many different notes in a scale at once, it will sound dissonant, but the biggest problem is your chords pretty much all sound the same if you're doing it a lot. to me anyway. sometimes it's good for an effect though. no technique in music is bad per se, just depends on how the person writes with it.

but yeah, that's just one example... pretty much what i'm trying to say i guess is to just take one element at a time, and figure it out to where you're somewhat comfortable doing it, then apply it. if you're writing stuff from your head, it especially helps because it gives you more options.

Last edited by Dregen : 09-24-2013 at 11:40 PM.
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Old 09-25-2013, 07:34 AM   #5
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Yeah, there is a lot of genericness in this song, then again you don't see THAT many bands writing this kind of metalcore any more, a lot of it's moved on to the ott chuggy stuff. The riffs are serviceable if not amazing, but then again writing an amazing, original and catchy riff isn't something everyone can do in a day, it takes work so don't get discouraged!

I think the song over all could really do with some variance, you repeat a lot of sections without really changing anything and thus the song doesn't really feel like it's going anywhere. A song like this should build to something, sure there's a solo but it doesn't have a huge impact because it's simply kind of their without any build to it. Think of music like a Rollercoaster, you can't have the massive exciting drops and loops without building up some height!

Also the drums could really use some work, they're really quite dull. Find some songs you like the drum parts of and see if you can find some guitarpro files for them, examine how they build their beats and stuff.

If you have time I'd really appreciate you checking my two latest songs:

All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself

Originally Posted by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
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Old 09-25-2013, 06:23 PM   #6
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every thing that i actually though while listening to your song has been said. dregen told u already, experientation is the key for improvement.
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Old 09-26-2013, 08:42 PM   #7
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somewhat piggy-backing off of what Dregen said, one of the best ways to improve is to get out of your comfort zone, do new things. try things youd never think youd want to do. theres a lot of things i used to "hate", and now i do them a lot. i.e. harmonies of 4ths and 5ths

my advice: get weird as **** for a bit. listen to weird stuff, play weird stuff, learn weird stuff, etc.

granted you probably arent looking to write prog music, but id recommend listening to some. even if you are going for metalcore, which isnt necessarily a bad genre, you can learn a thing or two from it
"I give it a toshuggah-peroacheract out of thall"

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Old 09-28-2013, 09:29 PM   #8
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I'm just REALLY glad this isn't like the current Metalcore scene. I almost want to call this amazing just because it's such a refreshing break from the genericore being put out by -core bands today. Bar 65 was really nice. It had some rhythm to it as opposed to what was mostly quarter and eighth notes before it. I know it's not always natural to have varied rhythms but whenever riffs break away from the on-beats, it usually has more catchiness and interest
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