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Old 06-05-2014, 11:43 AM   #1
Bleed Away
th.
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: the alley at dawn
A turn of events.

Only this body will I let you reach.
Only my blood will I let you see.
Only God loves you more than me.
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Mulbery
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Old 06-10-2014, 12:36 PM   #2
doubtfulsalmon
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Oh man that last line.

This feels like part of something bigger though, almost an aside from another piece.

Hang on in there, things will get better.
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Words

Noise
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Old 06-10-2014, 06:46 PM   #3
hippieboy444
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Join Date: Apr 2006
i agree wtih doubtfulsalmon, this would be a great ending to a longer, multi-part poem.
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wild blue yonder
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Old 06-12-2014, 08:06 AM   #4
Bleed Away
th.
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: the alley at dawn
Thanks! Yeah, I agree as well. It was originally meant to be the opening lines to a poem that I wanted to write but, I think it, could very well work as a closer to a poem. I felt very strongly about these three lines, so I used them as a stand-alone. I will most likely come back to this and expand.
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Old 06-14-2014, 04:29 AM   #5
pixiesfanyo
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: idyllwild, california
This should definitely be expanded friend.
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