Toxification

I'm looking for advice on my lyrics. I'm only 14, so don't expect them to be MJK's standard, but I think they're pretty good. Good enough for my teachers to accuse me of plagiarizing at least lol. These are for rock/metal;

EDIT:
I've noticed some more problems with the said example and decided to scrap it. Please criticize the writing on post 4.

Dwarffi

Just make them be growled so unclearly that it doesn't matter what the words are.

Jk, they're pretty good. I prefer lyrics with trolls and mead, though.

Toxification

I'll get right on it!

Toxification

The choice that sealed your fate,
The decision that marked your date.
His thirst you cannot sate
His arrival you cannot delay

There's dread behind and doom ahead,
Death's hunger you cannot feed,
His calls you can't ignore,
His summoning you must heed

No turning back, no place to hide
No one to hear your cries,
Nobody to buy your lies,
The end is nigh, your future has died
The light of hope has dimmed,
His evil glare
His stabbing stare
His maniacal, heralding grin,
As he reminds you of your debt
To pay for your sins,
Karma wipes cleans it's knife
Cherishing it's long-awaited revenge.


I'd like to dedicate this to Adam Lanza and James Holmes. Rot in hell, you bastards!
Slightly random, but it contributes to a pretty doommetalishy atmosphere.