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Old 10-06-2012, 09:06 AM   #1
Jehannum
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Then She Smiles - song - C4C

Spent three weeks on this and lost all the component tracks in a software crash. Only the mixdown remains (glad I saved it just before!) so there are a few flaws I can't fix, but it was very nearly finished.

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Old 10-08-2012, 04:26 PM   #2
boratian
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The instrumentals give me the exact same feel as a Pink Floyd song would, very mellow and flowing. I like it! The vocals are halfway to matching the music, they feel ever so slightly out of place, I can't pinpoint why exactly...I think you might be approaching the track just a touch too aggressively?

The production itself is great, really well done there. Sucks that your stuff got wiped, I know the feeling
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Old 10-08-2012, 06:53 PM   #3
Orxris
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Nice tones on both/all guitars, the mix is very good, all parts are clearly defined. Definitely got something right there. The track's got a nice flow to it.

At first, the vocals do seem a touch out of place, but then they meld perfectly when the track gets bigger/more aggressive. I think i've had a similar problem before, I solved it by bringing down the high end a tad, making the vocals sound softer. But seeing as you've only got the mixdown that might be a hard thing to solve without affecting the mix in general, which is damn good by the way

Lyrics are good, I got a rough idea of what they evoke. But in my opinion, obscure lyrics are the best kind of lyrics. So thats a bonus

If you decide to re-record it, I hope it turns out as good as this version!
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Old 10-08-2012, 09:46 PM   #4
aaron aardvark
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Jehannum,
Thanks for the reviews! On another thread you mentioned you have a tough time double-tracking the vocals (I don't think this song is in desperate need of vocal double-tracking at all). What I discovered recently is this: if my timing isn't very consistent between the 2 vocal tracks it sounds sloppy; so I do this: I have the original (best I can do) vocal track on track 1. I do Melodyne pitch correction on that track, and it goes on track 2 (original non-corrected vocal track stays on track 1). If you play them back, it probably doesn't sound good unless you shift one of the vocal tracks forward in time between 5-30 milliseconds. It gives the full double-track effect pretty well. Now your tune: Intro guitars are sounding quite nice. I'm liking the piano a lot. Vocals are pretty good, slightly pitchy at times. Vocal style is good, though vocal range is rather limited note-wise. Instrumentally, it sounds very good!

Last edited by aaron aardvark : 10-08-2012 at 09:50 PM.
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Old 10-09-2012, 10:16 AM   #5
fc89konkari
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Beautful and even mix! Some things popped into my mind: the snare isn't my piece of cake, don't know how you did it, but I don't really like it You managed to make a nice dynamic track with not throwing everything everywhere. The lead guitar fit the mix ever so perfectly. Really nice work there! Vocals also sat in nicely. Another thing is that you could've somehow taken an advantage of the stereo spectrum a little more. It's quite center focused, isn't it?

Thanks for the crit!
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Old 10-09-2012, 04:28 PM   #6
tottsk1
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THe music is great, the vocals could improve though. Would be nice if you sang more powerful in some part of the song, maybe make a chorus to break up with the laid back feeling of the rest of the song. Great tunes nonetheless
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Old 10-11-2012, 01:05 AM   #7
shortyafter
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Hey it's a chill song I like it. Nice lyrics. Guitar playing is great. Instrumental break at 3:00 - - love it dude. I think vocals could improve, especially in the verse. Maybe change up the melody a bit I wasn't totally feelin it. But the chorus is nice somehow gives me a Beatles vibe. Good stuff man!
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Old 10-14-2012, 03:43 PM   #8
MetalCommand
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Thanks for the crit on mine. On to yours...

Quite a pleasant tone of the clean guitar in the intro and the lead that comes in sounds cool too. The short lead parts in the chorus are a good idea. Vocals are ok. The snare is rather prominent in the mix, compared to the rest of the drums. I like the overall laid back vibe of the song. Overall, it's a nice listen, good work.
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Old 10-14-2012, 06:16 PM   #9
STIRMling
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I dug this man!! I love the guitar work, but the drums don't quite sound right to me :/. The vocals were really nice. I think it would sound really awesome if you ran them through with a bit more distortion, but that's just my opinion.
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Old 10-15-2012, 07:57 PM   #10
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