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Old 10-06-2012, 11:29 PM   #1
Joshua1207
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"Isolation" and "Run Away" (C4C, Indie)

If you're only going to critic one song please critic "Isolation"


First song "Run Away" was an attempt at a more upbeat song, I suppose? I usually just mess around whenever I decide to record something and this came out. In the little solo-ish part, if you could call it that, I did things a tad funny and it may sound a bit off but I dunno, I like how I did it.

http://soundcloud.com/joshua1207/run-away

Second song "Isolation" is a song I finished today after about three days of work. There's only really two sections to this song as well and I didn't really know what to do with the second half so I ****ed around, added some odd sounds here and there, made some things backwards, etc. Its kind of trippy, maybe? It doesn't sound too bad, I think.

http://soundcloud.com/joshua1207/isolation

Critic and I'll comment back of course, thanks.
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Last edited by Joshua1207 : 10-19-2012 at 06:19 PM.
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Old 10-08-2012, 07:31 PM   #2
Orxris
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Run Away;

First off, I have no idea what your trying to acheive other than upbeat, so I'm sorry if it seems like im doing nothing but putting it down :/

Personally, I dont really think this song goes anywhere. Nothing wrong with that though.

It's got some nice tunes, they work well with each other without getting in the way. Keep doing that, makes it sound nice to my ears :P To me, the transitions between chorus and verse don't really work, they're too sudden. Although, on the 5th listen, i'm starting to get it.

Nice choice of percussion, guitar tones are good, mix is good. Im struggling to hear some things, but i'm not sure if they're meant to be hidden like they are. The song seems to busy to have hidden layers, it has a more 'in your face' kind of quality.

I reckon you have vocals to go on top of it? As it stands it's hard to keep listening to, I reckon adding vocals - And by doing that an extra melody - to it would make it more interesting.

I hope this gets fleshed-out into a full 3-4 minuter, i'd definatly like to hear it

Isolation;

I really, really liked this one. From the off I knew what this was going to do. I love the use of panning, really brought it to life. Nice melodies, that piano adds a huge amount of atmosphere - haunting yet understanding is the only way i can put it - to an already nicely atmospheric track. The build ups are perfect, transitions smooth. Keep making tracks like this and i'll listen to them all.

Really finding it hard to criticize anything, so I guess there'll be no constructive criticism.

P.s Roads to Roads Is Awesome.
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Old 10-08-2012, 09:01 PM   #3
Joshua1207
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The one downfall to my music is that I don't have a vocalist at all so none of these songs will probably receive vocals in them. Although its not too bad, i have songs like Isolation and Roads to Roads (among others) that sound good enough as an instrumental. I'm glad you liked Isolation, I was really iffy on some parts of that song, but I think it turned out decent. Thanks again.
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Old 10-08-2012, 10:43 PM   #4
aaron aardvark
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Joshua,
I started listening to "Runaway", I liked the way it started, but it became a bit too discordant for me, so I listened to "Isolation", I liked this a lot better. It is an interesting and moody song. Interesting backward sounds. This could be good movie background music. Please review my music at this link:

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...92#post30422092
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Old 10-20-2012, 10:35 PM   #5
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Isolation
I love how the guitar sits back though it'd be great to hear it brought to the front after a few bars. I think the guitar octaves that start around 1:06 would sound even better panned hard to one side, away from the piano. Maybe spread some of the percussion out as well. Something in the left speaker at 0:20 made me pause the song and check that it wasn't something from coming from outside haha! Nice song man, very different.
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Old 10-20-2012, 10:53 PM   #6
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Run Away:

It seems to be sort of pointless and it doesn't go anywhere. It sort of feels like one really long bridge, but the rest of the song is missing, or something. There's some good musical ideas in there, but it seems like if you worked on making it in to a full song and giving it a proper arrangement, it would really stand out as something cool. As it is now, it's just not going anywhere.

Isolation:

I love that intro. There's some really good sounds going on there. It seems to build up as the song goes, and was just over all a pretty cool song. It seems like it should be in a movie soundtrack during a really bleak and moody scene. I really can't point out anything I don't like here, everything just works.

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Old 10-28-2012, 03:00 PM   #7
Tomaz24
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Isolation: a great sound for that guitar work in the background, mixes very dynamically with the piano and kit. The bass is nice, but could perhaps be a bit more spontaneous at times, seems a bit routed at the moment. Great build-up and that odd progressive screeching tone really sounds great. The beat could do with a kick up the backside toward the end for the crescendo it deserves. It's a great track with lots of character and subtly, great stuff! Thanks for the input on my track.
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Old 10-29-2012, 02:46 AM   #8
January85
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Ok Isolation, here we go...

Hmm, very weird sounds and kinda weird composition. The piano for some weird reason starts to bring it together. It's actually the CYMBAL samples that really take me out of the experience. And I guess it can be hard for people who have less experience with drums to make like... authentic drum tracks so I GET IT, but those crash cymbals just going out over and over out of nowhere is friggin' driving me nuts! haha

Crash sounds for me really serve a purpose of accenting the important parts and some people use them to drive the beat in heavier parts but here they're just accenting everything that would just be fine on their own. Like completely fine! No problem at all. Those quiet ride samples... are... ok. They're not distracting tho they're not a substitute for a real ride cymbal. Ride is pretty much the only percussion you can't fake with samples. Just not gonna happen. And it SUCKS cos I always do my drums with samples and I love a good ride beat. But like I said... it's ok.

I would also maybe recommend trying out some amp sims for the guitar because the room reverb the mic is picking up kinda destroys the spacey feel of the other instruments... especially the piano. They just don't mix together because they're from different worlds. Like Darth Vader in Lord of the Rings! It's ok to try and bring them together but the other option is finding a good spacey sounding acoustic instrument that ties them together. Just recording the guitar thru ampsim can be a lot easier.

The first minute of the song compositionwise is fine but then like at 0:55 there starts to come out some very dissonant piano sounds... and then the rest of the song the instruments kinda play different songs (which I guess can be interesting for some people). I liked those swelling guitar sounds at the end! They could've done a lot in other parts of the song too!

Insidentally I liked those random ambient sounds in the song the most! I don't know where you got those, but they really make the song stick. Without them pretty much none of this could've worked. Oh apparently you did have those swelling sounds in the middle there. Yeah, they really bring a great atmosphere to that part if only the piano wasn't messing around so much!

DAMN... I just can't grasp the second half of the song. It's the bass, piano and guitar all playing a different song, really. And I can appreciate trying something really weird because it takes guts to try even if it doesn't quite work. What I would SUGGEST is to... try and write a couple of those instruments to go very well together and then one of the instruments can kinda take the whole thing off the rails a little bit. That, I think, would be a lot more enjoyable to listen to. But hey, I only write like friggin' pop tunes! So maybe take what you think is usable in my comment and trash the rest.

Hey, kudos for trying something new!

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Old 10-29-2012, 10:29 PM   #9
Joshua1207
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I actually used amp simulators on this, as with all my other songs haha. Thanks for the comments though, I'll keep 'em in mind
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Old 10-31-2012, 01:37 PM   #10
ryan19
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isolation: nice experimental sound. digging the piano, makes me want to start adding keys in my music. the ending reminded me of kings of leon for some reason, maybe cuz of the guitar. i think it would have been cool at the end if you started doing a beat and made it heavier so the song is building up to something. right now it feels like an intro for a song. just my opinion. but theres some cool ideas and i like the overall sound.

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Old 11-03-2012, 07:32 AM   #11
UntitledNinja
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"Run away" Seemed a little off to me, doesn't make much sense. If its meant to only be an instrumental song, then you didn't do a bad job. "Isolation" seems like a intro song, sounds like it's a huge build up to another really upbeat song. Think you should use it has an intro and use those chords you strumming towards the end, as the beginning of the new part. cool ideas you've got.
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