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Old 01-11-2013, 07:57 PM   #1
unicornicopia
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Engrain

Sometimes,
when it's very, very quiet,
my ears will whistle and ring
as if they can't bear,
can't tolerate
the silence.

Much in the same way,
I still see you
when I sleep.
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Old 01-12-2013, 04:24 PM   #2
Saparasa
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Simple and effective. I really like it. Two very relatable ideas which work well together. The way the lines get shorter in the second verse works well too, making me pause and think while I read it. I reckon for it to really effect the reader they would need to have experienced the theme of the second section, I suppose that's true to a lot of poetry...
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Old 01-15-2013, 12:09 PM   #3
seventh_angel
So-Called New-Age(d) Poet
 
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Join Date: Aug 2007
This is how simplicity has an impact.
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