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Old 03-21-2013, 02:56 PM   #1
doofus41
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Big Egos

So I went to band practice last night and our drummer showed me what he'd come up with for a song that we're working on. I really didn't like it, expressed that I felt it didn't fit the song and got a speech about how he's better than most metal drummers, how he's going to play to his ability, play whatever he wants, and how I just don't understand rudiments or polyrhythms and then mocked me for wanting a simpler beat...
This was also after he told our bassist (who also didn't like it) that he (the bassist) didn't have as much say in band matters because he's (the drummer) "been in the band longer".

Is there a way to handle these types of band disputes? I really don't want to scrap the song due to a disagreement and I don't want to have to quit. Help please

Last edited by doofus41 : 03-21-2013 at 03:04 PM.
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Old 03-21-2013, 03:44 PM   #2
bingeandletgo
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Sneak some shrooms into his body somehow
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Old 03-21-2013, 04:20 PM   #3
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Either get him really stoned so he think he is play fast, but in all reality hes playing close to 1 bpm on the snare. Or you can grow a pair and talk to him saying that it isn't a one man band (if it is then its a really weird argument with yourself) and that everybody has to compromise for the music. Just like some people don't like shredding guitar every second of a song some people don't complicated rhythms the whole song.

If he is too unreasonable just give him a drum solo or kick his ass.
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Old 03-21-2013, 04:30 PM   #4
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How many members are in your band?
Take a vote; at this level, your band is a democracy, not a dictatorship.
Also, I would call him out on that "I was in the band longer, so I have more say" bullshit, because that's not how that works at all.

Or, if you really want to be an asshole and hit him where it hurts, ask "If you're so good, why aren't you playing in bigger bands?"

As a side note: This dude sounds like one of those jerk-offs who think they're god's gift to music because they try to play as complex as they can all the time and then fail when they're asked to play a simple beat. Based on what you've told us about his personality, I don't think any amount of reasoning will change this dude's mind.
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Old 03-21-2013, 04:43 PM   #5
vIsIbleNoIsE
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sorry dude, but this drummer doesn't sound like someone i'd want to be in a band with. or be friends with.
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Old 03-21-2013, 04:47 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by vIsIbleNoIsE
sorry dude, but this drummer doesn't sound like someone i'd want to be in a band with. or be friends with.

qft

As soon as someone starts talking like this, it just starts a snowball of issues for the future.
If he gets his way, he'll be worse the next time something like this comes up.
If he doesn't get this way, he'll continue to be a vaginoplasty about everything from that point on until he gets his way with something.

Find a new drummer.
Quit the band.

Bottom line, don't deal with kids who a way act that
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Old 03-21-2013, 04:54 PM   #7
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Old 03-21-2013, 05:30 PM   #8
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Your drummer's a self-important twit who has no idea how the world of music works. Dump him at your earliest convenience. Of course, you can try talking some sense into him and I'd certainly recommend going that route first and foremost, but operating under the assumption that he's not going to take it to heart (I can pretty much guarantee this) you should be prepared to drop his ass as soon as humanely possible.

People need to understand that while technical music is great and definitely has an audience, not every song calls for complexity - and if he can't handle being told 'I don't think this fits' without throwing a juvenile little fit, then he has no place in a band. A band is a collaborative effort, but it sounds like he just wants a place to hang out and act like he's top shit - musicians like that, no matter how skilled, will only hold you back in the end.

Tell him to go start his own band if he just wants to be a show-off, no one should have to tolerate such immature behavior and the longer you do the more difficult it'll be to handle down the road.
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Old 03-21-2013, 08:23 PM   #9
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let the drummer run the band, he's your talent and your face. you're a nobody, a has-been, a wash-up
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Old 03-22-2013, 02:04 AM   #10
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The trap your drummer is falling into is common amongst all instruments. You get to a certain level of technicality and feel that you have to push your own limits on every song, whether it sounds good or not. It's basically the drum equivalent of shredding guitar constantly over every song - you can get your rocks off but the pure truth is that most songs sound worse with super complex parts. The part is complex because the player feels they need to make it complex, rather than the part enhancing the song. In most cases it actually detracts from the song, making it a less unified piece and worse to listen to.

Unfortunately the guys above are right. This sort of thing is something your drummer will have to discover for himself. You can't "make" him learn it. A lot of musos never grow out this stage.

Regardless talk to him honestly first. Tell him if he cant adapt unfortunately its not a right fit. If he refuses to change, tell him sorry we need someone who can work with the band, all the best for the future.
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Old 03-22-2013, 02:27 AM   #11
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If my drummer acted like that I would be looking for a new drummer or a new band. The first rule of playing with other people is to be respectful, something your drummer clearly doesn't understand. However, I know that it can be difficult to find a new band or a new drummer, depending on your age, where you live and what genre you want to play. So, seeing as you don't want to look for a new band or a new drummer, I would suggest that you show your drummer some bands that you would like to sound like and tell him that you would prefer the drums to also be like those bands do. This will work better if they are bands that he also likes. Then, when it happens again, tell him that the drummer in whatever band you agreed to sound like would never play something like that. Then he might be more willing to change his playing.
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Old 03-22-2013, 02:36 AM   #12
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just talk to him about it calmly with that band. try to record it how you want it and then let him wank all over the song. hopefully when you play it back to him he will agree with you.

or maybe your wrong and he should kick you out of the band
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:01 AM   #13
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If the beat he came up with doesn't fit with the song you're currently working on, why not suggest that you use that beat as a basis for a new song?

That way you don't ruin the song you're currently working on and your drummer won't get pissed off that you are ignoring his ideas - you're still using his idea just not where he originally intended.
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Old 03-22-2013, 04:46 PM   #14
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Try and find a part in the song for a complicated drum part that will really showcase his talents, most likely the bridge, where things are aloud to get weird. As a drummer I see where he's coming from, but he's working against the band, not with them, and that never works. Try and find a compromise.
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Old 03-22-2013, 05:17 PM   #15
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I was in a band that had a lead guitarist like that, he liked to make parts as technical as possible (sweeps and shredding in Alternative-Pop stuff, like the Pixies).

First try teaching him that musicality is more important than technicality and that most people are actually bored by over the top technicality. Being a good musician isn't about the difficulty of what you're playing, it's about playing to what fits, it's about knowing when not to play at all. The best example of a drummer like this, and I'm sure I'll take heat for this, is Meg White.

If he continues to see music as just trying to play super hard stuff and show off, kick him out. I ended up quitting that band I was in because he was family with other band members, and I didn't want to start fights within their family.
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Old 03-22-2013, 06:45 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ccannon1
I was in a band that had a lead guitarist like that, he liked to make parts as technical as possible (sweeps and shredding in Alternative-Pop stuff, like the Pixies).

First try teaching him that musicality is more important than technicality and that most people are actually bored by over the top technicality. Being a good musician isn't about the difficulty of what you're playing, it's about playing to what fits, it's about knowing when not to play at all. The best example of a drummer like this, and I'm sure I'll take heat for this, is Meg White.

If he continues to see music as just trying to play super hard stuff and show off, kick him out. I ended up quitting that band I was in because he was family with other band members, and I didn't want to start fights within their family.

This. I really hate people who need to play over complicated parts just for the sake of it. The parts need to fit together well, it doesn't need to be complicated to sound good. Maybe record yourself playing the same song with different kind of drum parts and show the drummer how they sound and ask him which one he prefers. Tell him to focus on the overall music, not just drums. Individual parts really mean nothing. It's about how the parts work together. And yes, sometimes it's better not to play and it might give it a really cool sound.

I really don't enjoy playing in a band because of complicated or "fun" parts. IMO the music needs to sound good and I would enjoy it even if I had to play 8th notes on the open E string throughout the whole song if it just sounded good. Play what the song needs you to play. (I think I'm going to sig myself again lol )
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Old 03-23-2013, 09:33 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WeZ-84
If the beat he came up with doesn't fit with the song you're currently working on, why not suggest that you use that beat as a basis for a new song?

That way you don't ruin the song you're currently working on and your drummer won't get pissed off that you are ignoring his ideas - you're still using his idea just not where he originally intended.

Rejected ideas add up.
It doesn't really teach him anything, and there's no reason to settle if his ideas don't fit the music. Otherwise you just end up with a few songs that fit your genre and then twenty songs for some pretentious progressive rock side-project/album.
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