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Old 04-02-2010, 12:16 PM   #1
Ometh
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Deathgrindish song (C4C)

Here is a song that I've done for a project I'm working on lately; you know the drill, be honest, give constructive criticism and I'll comment your song, yada yada.
Attached Files
File Type: gp5 Deathgrind song 2.gp5 (90.6 KB, 362 views)
File Type: gp4 Deathgrind song 2.gp4 (55.5 KB, 58 views)
File Type: mid Deathgrind song 2.mid (72.3 KB, 51 views)

Last edited by Ometh : 05-01-2010 at 12:39 PM.
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Old 04-02-2010, 12:24 PM   #2
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I enjoyed that, it was done really well. All Id say is to add more of a solo, then it would be AWESOME. Its really good though. Good job

C4C?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1295793

Tell me what you think, thanks.
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Old 04-02-2010, 02:30 PM   #3
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so far i like the drums. i think you should switch them up a bit more then doing blast beats most of the time though. is it suppose to be kinda short? cause i think it is but there is nothing wrong with that. maybe you should add a solo in it. its pretty kiss ass man. 9/10

C4C? its probably not your type of music
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1295242
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Old 04-02-2010, 10:50 PM   #4
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I really like that. the drum intro was really cool. i like that first riff. the solo was nice and dissonant. than the slower( but still fast part) is really cool the palm muted chugging and everything really like it. the tremolo picked part is alright. the drumming is good like the cymbal shots. when it gets into the higher tremolo part though thats better. the next thrash part is nice. and the slower part with the cymbal hit was heavy. and that next part is pretty awesome love the double bass behind that very headbangable. the fast part before the ending was frantic the ending it self was pretty good.

8/10
C4C? One of the bottom two in my signature
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Old 04-03-2010, 02:22 AM   #5
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Thoroughly enjoyed this one, wasn't expecting it to be so groovy. and it's completely brutal the whole way through too. All it needs is some good vocals (none of that burping shit)
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Old 04-03-2010, 05:12 PM   #6
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AWESOME DUDE REAL TALENT!!
Agora vou falar em portugues tbm pra por estes gajos a pensar q tou a dizer algo extraordinario!!A elogiar ttl a tua cena com argumentos irrefutaveis quando apenas se trata de estupideZ!!
xD N curto deathgrind mas isto tem quality!
You've got potential keep writing!
Coisas em portugues para finalizar o meu comment.
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Old 04-03-2010, 05:33 PM   #7
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Dude that was frickin' brutal . The drums basically tore my balls off .

But in all seriousness, it was a good ole' slice of what I'd call old-school death metal - thrashy riffs with fast picking and extreme drums. The brief but slow section was a nice break from the overall hectic sound. My only reccomendation would be to add some more lead parts (such as a solo maybe? etc.).

Pretty brutal stuff, keep it up. 9/10 (no need for a return crit, my pieces are oooold.)
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Old 04-03-2010, 07:52 PM   #8
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Haha I'm pretty sure the drummer's legs will fall of and his snare will have a massive hole in it by the time the song is done. Anyway, this is why I love deathgrind. Its the only other genre in the grindcore family besides grindcore itself that I don't hate. The song itself is fast, brutal, and totally ****ing insane. The guitars are everything I expected in a deathgrind(ish) song. The drums are pretty solid, but the 2nd half of 19 is confusing to me. Kind of breaks the song up real weird. The china in the blastbeats at 32 made me lol. 66 was easily one of my favorite parts of the song. All in all, nice job.
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Old 04-03-2010, 07:59 PM   #9
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****en awesome! \m/ now thats how u ****in drum! xD
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Old 04-03-2010, 08:41 PM   #10
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AH.

The drums made me lol.

bar 15 seemed a bit out of place, but then again i know nothing about grindcore.

Yay tremelo picking.

48, nice reintro

really like the drums starting at 58. i'm a sucker for off beat chinese cymbals.

68, a possibly overdue atmosphere change.

You know, i'm not a huge fan of your main riff. everything else is solid...as solid as grinddeathcoreblackmetal can be,

nice outro. fitting end for a brutal song.



So you drove up next to me, offered me candy, slamed the door, punched me in the face, tore my balls off, put my face in a blender, broke both my legs, shaved my head with a lawnmower, and fed the remains to a velociraptor.

You sir have one nutcruncher on your hands.
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Old 04-05-2010, 12:12 AM   #11
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I like the little drum-fill intro.

First riff: good riff, very groovy/catchy, but still brutal; good drums.
I like how the lead starts with a harmony; decent little solo.

Second riff: again, solid riff. I like the slowdown at the end.
The variation is good as well, nice use of harmonic; the changed drums give it a different feel.

Tremolo riff: the first tremelo bit is kind of bland, but it's not bad; transitions well into the next part, which I think is quite awesome.
I like how you've harmonized it, and this flows really well back into the first main riff.

Third chord-y riff: just awesome; very brutal, kind of in your face.

Slower riff: I like the build-up with the one guitar. I'd change the drums up a little bit though; i'd have them continuously doing something rather than sort of stopping and starting again with the snare and tom fill.
I really like this riff, as well as the drum beat for it, but I'd vary up the riff a little bit instead of just the one bar repeating over and over.

I like how you transitioned back to the main riff in sort of three steps (guitar, guitar-bass-drums, then both guitars).

Last tremolo riff; another riff nicely done, but again, i might change it up at the last bar just so it doesn't keep repeating the same sort of thing.

I'd also maybe take out the 2 beat break at the very end, it just kind of sounds awkward.

I get a huge Napalm Death vibe for pretty much this entire song; it's brutal as fuck.
Easily 9/10, great song.

C4C mine?
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Last edited by FrEaKGuItArIsT : 04-05-2010 at 12:13 AM.
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Old 04-05-2010, 01:06 AM   #12
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Relentless, insane song. I love deathgrind, and I thought it was cool seeing a song here that played more like a recording than a gp5 compo

I like the almost anthemic main riff, and the breakdown-ish riff starting at bar 66. I can't imagine what kind of grav blasting beast would be at the kit, but that's just the beauty of it all

Anyways, c4c another metal track? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1296962
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Old 05-01-2010, 07:49 AM   #13
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Thanks for your crit mate ! Can you post gp4 file so I could crit your song too?
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Old 05-01-2010, 12:34 PM   #14
Ometh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xbitmetal
Thanks for your crit mate ! Can you post gp4 file so I could crit your song too?

Shure, I'll update the first post.
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Old 05-01-2010, 05:03 PM   #15
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Nice brutal stuff. Kickass drums. 14 on- very brutal feeling. Love the riff. 24 on it went into total madness with doublebass hell. 32- is sick. Very brutal stuff. Crazy moshpit music. 58 on it had nice groove in it. Tempo change in 66 was good idea. Comeback into old stuff was brutal. 89- on sick riff. Crazy vocals would fit well and it worked well as outro. Very nice stuff 8/10!
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Old 05-16-2010, 04:41 PM   #16
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Oh gods, it hurt my ears ;_;

There was just too much of... well, everything. I'm... not really sure how else to say it.
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Old 05-16-2010, 05:26 PM   #17
Ometh
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Quote:
Originally Posted by infinatedestiny
Oh gods, it hurt my ears ;_;

There was just too much of... well, everything. I'm... not really sure how else to say it.


Well can you elaborate?
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Old 05-16-2010, 05:47 PM   #18
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i'll elaborate for him.
its pretty terrible. it hits you straight away with so many drums. its too too too too too too much!

you need to slooooooow yourwself down, put in some rhytmic drumming, because it did actually hurt my ears.

im not trying to be a twat, but it is pretty terrible, IMO.

i mean the rhythm itself is just baaaaaad. i may do generic stuff, but the stuff i do is easy to follow. Your stuff you get lost straighaway, try as i could, there was no enjoyment of that "song".

The highlight was the lead guitar, but even that wasnt very good, just semi original.

I think you should step away from the entire genre that your aiming for, get to know what stuff you can do, make melodic stuff, rather than insane beats that make no sense.

1/10, and to me thats generous.


Anyway, im betting your annoyed at me, and wanna flame my stuff too, so C4C is in the signature below here
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Old 05-16-2010, 06:38 PM   #19
huevos
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 13thCrucifix
i'll elaborate for him.
its pretty terrible. it hits you straight away with so many drums. its too too too too too too much!

you need to slooooooow yourwself down, put in some rhytmic drumming, because it did actually hurt my ears.

im not trying to be a twat, but it is pretty terrible, IMO.

i mean the rhythm itself is just baaaaaad. i may do generic stuff, but the stuff i do is easy to follow. Your stuff you get lost straighaway, try as i could, there was no enjoyment of that "song".

The highlight was the lead guitar, but even that wasnt very good, just semi original.

I think you should step away from the entire genre that your aiming for, get to know what stuff you can do, make melodic stuff, rather than insane beats that make no sense.

1/10, and to me thats generous.


Anyway, im betting your annoyed at me, and wanna flame my stuff too, so C4C is in the signature below here


It captures the spirit of deathgrind perfectly. This isn't actually all too complex or "insane". Very groovy and tasty are better descriptors.

I was absolutely certain that I had critted this song before, but I guess not.

The main riff is awesome. It's simple and beautifully crafted; no pretense or wasting of time. It's catchy too.
Bar 14 riff is pretty awesome too. It's got the groove.
The only real break from the mood is at bar 44-45. The cymbals just throw it a bit off course. I think it's the only part of the song that's unnecessary.

Since the dude that quoted isn't into this type of music, I would take it with a grain of salt. I'm not all that much into deathgrind like I used to be, but I can appreciate this song for what it's worth.

Now I have a song that I would like you to take a look at. It doesn't have to be an extensive crit, just a couple of pointers on how to improve my song.
Please note that it isn't as polished or straight forth as your song.
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1314132

EDIT: Don't listen to the asshat that is the 13thCrucifix. He goes and delivers very inane commentary on things he doesn't understand. It's ok if you don't like a certain song, but you'll look like a complete moron if you can't back up your point.

Last edited by huevos : 05-16-2010 at 06:46 PM.
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Old 05-18-2010, 05:13 AM   #20
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that is ****ing cool, nice one. Deathgring isn't really my style, but I enjoyed that almost as much as an actual recorded song.
Normally, I like to give a couple of possible improvements that someone could do to their song, but I actually wouldn't change a thing with that one.
I'm honestly suprised by how good it was.

Nice one!

C4C?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1314744
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