Morve38

I know that this genre is based on generic and reused riffs so comments stating that will be a tad redundant and not helpful at all =P My speakers are a little wonky so I apologize if the keyboards are too loud at parts, I can't really mix it on this computer.

Anyways, listen and let me know what you think! Post a link to a song you want me to crit and I'll get to it asap. And btw, I'll give as detailed of a crit as you give me.

Attached Files

Song 4.gp5 (93.7 KB, 376 views)

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frankibo

Well actually your riffs weren't that generic at all. I really liked the whole song. Loved the major-ness of the whole thing, very unusual for a metalcore song. I thought parts of it felt a bit weird, maybe it was the drumming. Just some of it didn't feel right, like when the intro riff came back. And the transition to the build was a bit sudden. Otherwise, nice work.

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andre27

Critting as I listen (sorry if its messy):

Main riff is very catchy, love the harmonies. Octave section as well, the drums are overkill during this part though, and it ruins it a bit.
Bars 65-72 are an OK transition to the next part. Good but could be better.
The breakdown definitely serves its purpose of being headbang-friendly, I'd make it a bit longer though.
Intro riff section is fine, the keys that show up at bar 89 don't really work great for me, I think it would work better as a guitar playing power-chords.
Bridge is really good simple but it works well. Leads that enter at bar 113 are brilliant. The keys at the build aren't great, do something about that.
Outro breakdown, although somewhat generic, is really great!

While there are some minor details that need fixing, the overall quality is good. At the moment I'd give your song a 7/10, which is OK, but fixing just a few things could really help push up the score with one or two points. Good job!

C4C Lilith in the sig please

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C4C?
On Letting Go, Pt.1 (Metalcore/Post-Hardcore)
Lilith (Post-Hardcore)
Stars to Live By. Stars to Steer By. Stars to Die By. (Post-Hardcore)
Lost in an Art of Suffering (Post-Hardcore)
Ants Under the Magnifying Glass (Post-Hardcore/Prog)

Morve38

Alright thanks for the feedback guys =D Really appreciate it.

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MattAnderson111

I'm very impressed with this actually, gives me some hope for the genre.

The thing I like the most is that, you write in a different key, but you don't just say "Oh, I'll just write generic metalcore riffs in a different key and call it original." You actually go about making it original.

I enjoy the keys during the octave part the most out of the whole song, that octave part makes it for me, this song shows technicality, while being catchy, which isn't too easy to pull off.

As andre27 said, the keys during the bridge are eh, mostly because it throws off the atmosphere, I feel like I'm listening to a Forever The Sickest Kids song during the bridge, while the rest of the song is just metalcore.

The verse riff is a highlight as well, since you variate the position piece, and it doesn't make me want to skip through the song.

With the right vocals and lyrical placement, this song could really shine.

I'd really appreciate it if you could take a look at my newest song.
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...80#post25571080

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Poop.



Yes, poop.

Morve38

Haha glad you liked it, we've actually got a final version of the song recorded and getting mastered. The keys in the bridge are waaay low in the mix so it fits a little better and adds more of an atmospheric element instead of being the lead instrument in that part. I'll post a link to it later, and tomorrow I have lots of free time so I'll crit the two songs you guys linked then.

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btones

I like this alot. As somebody said, the major-ness of it is pretty cool. When I clicked on this I expected a lot of 0 7 8. But anyway. Love the keyboard parts, they add a cool dimension to it... The drums are pretty great too.

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PSN: FLCL_Guitar

Morve38

Thanks! Really glad you liked it, here's the recorded version if any of you guys are interested:

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Nico the Great

If you think YOUR riffs are repetitive then I have a long way to go . I just listened to it, I REALLY like what you've done with the ensemble strings section, first off. It fits in really well with the song. My favorite part of the song is probably the octave section. This is gonna sound really vague but I just like how it feels with respect to the rest of the song, kinda gives a "rising up" feeling. I dunno.

I also see what you mean about my breakdown being repetitive, in retrospect, after listening to this and other stuff.

The bridge is probably my second favorite part of the song. Same deal with the octaves section. Especially starting at measure 113.

Now I know you're looking for criticism, but I really can't think of much, to be quite honest. I'd give it an 8 out of 10. You could probably add some stuff to it just to make it more epic sounding (cheesy adjective, I know), so that's why it isn't higher. I can't really think of what though.

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7 STRING LEGION



Music Man
PRS
Mesa Boogie

crizzack

okay Ill start from the top at first when I heard the intro with the strings or whatever my first thought was eh I dont think Ill like this. which was a dumb assumption because once the guitars kicked in I got the sudden urge to grab my axe and start learning this master piece! I loved it, thought it was great. I dont think I can say anymore then that. I wouldnt change anything in that song, and if ya dont mind I think Im gonna keep it on my harddrive to learn it just for fun :P (also "the devils basement" is a song I posted at the beggining of the year that Id really like some feedback on if ya dont mind.)

Morve38

Thank you and I'm totally cool with you learning it for fun, I posted the actual recording so you can play along to that as well. If you post a link to your song I'll definitely return the crit.

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bassburton

How is this generic or reused? This is a very well crafted song man. I really like the fact you avoid the usual i - VI minor progression that's overusedin metalcore. The piano in the octave secion was incredible by the way. It's in a major key I can tell, but it was used in such a way that it made the song sound sad. Great breakdowns by the way, not necesarilly the most fresh, but the fact you avoided usual progressions typical powerchord chugging made them all the better. Overall the song sounded fairly post-hardcore-ish, but I found that to make the song better.
8.5/10

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The clock strikes midnight
When tomorrow and today collide
The moon is at its highest
And the twilight seems fitting
For in these moments
The light at the end of the world
Shines like a thousand suns....


Victor Gutierrez