07-24-2011, 07:12 AM
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#81 | |
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Nearly laid an egg...
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Right behind y... Oh shit!!!
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Soviet scientist test capitalists for drug that keeps you awake. Capitalists do great, need no sleep and start working hard for motherland. After few days, capitalists start being nervous and twitchy, Soviet scientist throws in vodka to keep them calm. They work more hard.
After weeks, capitalists start killing eachother and throw feces at Soviet scientist. Day later, all capitalists have killed eachother and Soviet scientist keeps vodka to himself. Scientist gets awarded by Stalin for making capitalists work and kill them after.
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Sometimes girls say that too... 
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07-24-2011, 07:13 AM
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#82 | |
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We Came as Romans
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Jersey. If you could live forever, would you be ready for the next Adventure?
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You ask for 2 goats and get 3 goats
You can't explain that.
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Band page! http://www.facebook.com/bhofficialnj Tumblr-http://www.one-man-drinking-gamess.tumblr.com |
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07-24-2011, 07:14 AM
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#83 | ||
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Nearly laid an egg...
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Right behind y... Oh shit!!!
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Quote:
Goats reproduce for sake of Motherland. Goats are true Soviets.
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Quote:
Sometimes girls say that too...
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07-24-2011, 08:20 AM
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#84 | |
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2008
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It's ok, comrade, we can now start our own thread and write jokes про негров и рабство. И Вьетнам. И Буша младшего.  Funny funny stuff. Such is the life in America.Last edited by Gexzilla : 07-24-2011 at 08:24 AM. |
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07-24-2011, 09:25 AM
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#85 |
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Interdit
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Purf, 'Straya
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In Summer 1961, Glorious Soviet motherland suffer great drought, no rain fall for many week, halt vodka production and drinking of waters. Defence Ministry conduct atmospheric nuclear test in Oktober of year. Rain fall next day. Weather not true Soviet.
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07-24-2011, 09:40 AM
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#86 |
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Dirigo
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Dreaming in Polyrhythms
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A soviet daughter lay with me, her beloved friend, when KGB come into home. Bootsteps in the dead of night down hall to mother and fathers room. I could hear them dragging mother and father, and their nails filing against the wood. Take them to work forever. Come inside room and take my beloved friend against will, to another room and close door behind.
Such is life in soviet russia, with paws EDIT altered ending: I kid! Have no paws! Family skip work for being sick. We take them to work and burn dog for warmth. Such is life in soviet russia, eh?
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╘MESHUG╦G╗AH Dubstep can wubba wubba, fuzzfuzza, and WOMP WOMP... But only rock n' roll can COWBELL!!!!!!!!! ♦
♦ ♦ I demand that you like my reverbnation page Last edited by bastards : 07-24-2011 at 10:02 AM. |
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07-24-2011, 10:21 AM
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#87 | |
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Name's Dee. Ellis Dee.
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: IL, US, NA, NH, Earth
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These are a great way to get over a fear of actual creepypasta.
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The echoes of the past speak louder than any voice I hear right now.
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07-24-2011, 10:32 AM
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#88 | |||
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Now with 20% more guru!
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Bluth Banana Stand
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I will give it a try later, wish me wit and strength, comrades!
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07-24-2011, 11:01 AM
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#89 | |
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UG's Suffragette
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: On top of a hill, Australia
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My comrade and I not know one another very well. Niet, true child of motherland does not waste state air on small talk. I already say t
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He likes Keats but she's into Yeats - it's a matter of Romance
E-Mistress to UG's Finest Gentleman Quote:
Last edited by miss_muso~ : 07-24-2011 at 11:02 AM. |
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07-24-2011, 11:50 AM
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#90 | ||
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Keeper of the Seven Keys
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: I Want Out from Where the Rain Grows
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last.fm |
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07-24-2011, 11:55 AM
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#91 |
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Albuquerque, NM
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Two young comrades were friends of best, next to Stalin. One day they discuss glory of Lenin, heroism of Trotsky, wondering if there Moscow after Death. So, they make promise, whoever goes first would ring a bell from the other side to tell the other. Is wait for Mother Russia to distribute bells evenly to all comrades.
Several years later, when all of Russia rejoices with bells, comrade dies in a vodka accident. In the memorial service, faint bell sounds were heard. Comrade happy that she remembered her promise, and is someplace they might meet again someday. … Then the sound became feverish as if the ringer was in a panic. Such is Heaven in Mother Russia.
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It's a very different winter now and I'm in a very different place, but I hope you're well.
Saintly Rows||Drifter |
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07-24-2011, 12:00 PM
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#92 | |
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Cherry Picker
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Filey, North Yorkshire
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After long day in shoe factory, girl is home for 2 hour sleeping break. There is rumour of dirty capitalist pig in sacred motherland of Soviet Russia. There is many poster depicting this pig who defies the word of Stalin and sells dirty Capitalist magazines.
She looks out of the hole in the wall of her house and sees this man heading towards her house. But then glorious KGB beat Capitalist pig to ground, and send him to labour camp in Siberia to break down rocks. Girl is also beaten for looking at dirty Capitalist traitor. Such is life in Soviet Russia
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Hull City A.F.C Quote:
Last edited by cam_sampbell : 07-24-2011 at 12:03 PM. |
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07-24-2011, 12:08 PM
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#93 | ||
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O.N. Original Nunt
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Fitzwalkerstan
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Just made this up: Father of my father great cosmonaut. First to see above cloud for great Motherland. So, my father tell me. Motherland say it can't be so, for no record exist. Father succumb to vodka madness and perish. Mother spit on his grave for weakness and go to work. Food scarce now, vodka too. Many hours we wait in line for bread. Can no work when in line. Motherland waits for nourishment, must not test patience. Capitalist uncovered in bread line. Comrades attack and bring dog to his knees. There is deathblow and feeding. Capitalist devoured to nourish workers for Motherland. Flask found in Capitalist remnants. In mad reach for vodka it spill and moisten Motherland soil. There are tears, they season vodka dirt with salt. Looks like meat's back on the menu Comrades. Such is life in Mother Russia.
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XBOX LIVE Gamertag: Jazz Funeral
Currently killing with The Nunts crew in Max Payne 3 Quote:
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07-24-2011, 12:12 PM
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#94 |
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Albuquerque, NM
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You in cold tent in the night with your woman. You and woman begin procreation to strengthen the Motherland's numbers. Your woman's phone begins to ring. She answer it, and her face drop. The weak one begins to weep; you ask about call. She says,"It was papa! He was sent to Siberia for talks of liberty!".
NO PHONES IN SIBERIA! WOMAN LIES AND GOES TO SIBERIA!
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It's a very different winter now and I'm in a very different place, but I hope you're well.
Saintly Rows||Drifter |
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07-24-2011, 12:14 PM
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#95 | ||
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UG Fanatic
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: In the forest full of fallen trees
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How many comrades do take to screw in light bulb? None. Light bulbs work of capatalist pigs. Comrades strong and work in dark Such is life in Mother Russia
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Are you not entertained? No one gets to their heaven without a fight |
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07-24-2011, 12:31 PM
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#96 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2008
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I don't understand the point of this or see what's funny are you like modifying other texts or something?
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07-24-2011, 12:33 PM
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#97 | |
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is a Space Lion. ^___^
Join Date: May 2007
Location: [Arriving] somewhere, but not here...
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Capitalist pigs vill newer understand. And so, much is the melancholy of Mother Russia.
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YOU CAN'T SPELL "MESHUGGAH" WITHOUT "HUG" ^___^ Buy or download my music for free! Aberrant Corollary | Robots At A Rave Bandcamp Collecshun | Last.FM | My Anime List | Steam UG Post-Rock | UG Hip Hop Moar UGPR THERE IS NO HAPPY HERE |
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07-24-2011, 12:33 PM
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#98 | |
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Keeper of the Seven Keys
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: I Want Out from Where the Rain Grows
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they're taking the basic ideas from copypastas and making them into funny Russian versions of the stories.
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last.fm |
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07-24-2011, 01:14 PM
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#99 | |||
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Now with 20% more guru!
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Bluth Banana Stand
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Comrade hear on radio that capitalist pig-dog is on the loose in the Motherland. Comrade take a sip of vodka and look through glass doors, and outside see capitalist pig-dog standing in the snow outside of house, smiling at comrade. Comrade take a sip of vodka. Comrade pick up telephone to call KGB. When look out window again, comrade see that capitalist pig-dog is now closer. Comrade then notice there are no footprints in snow. Comrade had been seeing man's reflection. Comrade take a sip of vodka. Comrade turn around and hit capitalist pig-dog repeatedly in face with hardened worker hands. Comrade is sent to Siberia for not sharing vodka with his comrades.
Such is life in Mother Russia.
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07-24-2011, 01:38 PM
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#100 |
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diddlydiddlydiddlyswag
Join Date: Apr 2006
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Young comrade walk down street when he see picture on ground. Is picture of pretty girl, smiling and holding two fingers like Nixon capitalist pig. He smile too, and take picture with him.
That night KGB come and make him disappear for supporting capitalist pig propoganda. Next day, small boy see picture. Is of pretty girl, smiling and holding three fingers up. |
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