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Old 09-06-2011, 11:05 PM   #1
RedDeath9
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Closing the Book (progressive metal, GP5+GP4+MIDI) C4C

Yo, I've been working on this one for a while, probably since... Well, I don't know, but I think it's been at least a year. I think it turned out pretty well. Some obvious influences are Nevermore and Opeth. Hope you enjoy!
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Old 09-06-2011, 11:19 PM   #2
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I like it.
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Old 09-07-2011, 10:02 AM   #3
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Awesome stuff dude. It's really big on the Opeth influences, sometimes maybe a little bit too much? I feel it distracts somewhat from the identity of the piece.

Really love the unique ideas like the one at bar 72. You have some great phrasing at parts that really stick out

Only thing I really have critique on is that the flow of the piece isn't optimal. By bar 90 I was getting kind of tired of the same rhythm. Maybe a short clean interlude would help add a bit more dynamics to the piece.

But very good work regardless
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Old 09-10-2011, 07:57 PM   #4
HaydenHohns
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I disagree with Kirborg, I think the Nevermore influence is more prevalent, but I prefer Nevermore so that's a good thing in my books. Overall, after listening to the whole thing a few times, I can't find anything to really critique this piece, I'll just state what I like and then
disappear.

The riff at bar 28 is amazing. The only thing I would change about this piece is the notation. I think you should double the tempo, double the time signature (12/8) and double the note values. The score will look nicer. Just sayin'. I also love the riff fill at bars 40-41, really cool stuff there.

I don't here any Opeth influence until the keys come in at bar 50, where you use pizzicato strings/FX Rain to vary the timbre, which was well selected if you ask me. You could use Marimba for the next time it comes in? Nice stuff anyway. I also like how the drone/ringing notes change the accents, very typical of Stravinsky in a weird sort of way.

Guitar solo was really creative with the whammy bar usage and dissonant voicings. Excellent use of crescendo at bar 89.

Chords at 105 are really cool, reminds me of the Psalm of Lydia by Nevermore, which is a really cool song BTW. The phrasing of the guitar solo in the last two bars was really cool (127-8). Sax was a welcome change in timbre.

Bars 171 onwards chordal variation was really nice, great build up as well.

Intro reprisal was also very good. Keys added to the atmosphere quite well.

Overall I can't complain really. It's a fantastic song, maybe Nevermore will hire you as their new guitarist. I wouldn't be worried if they did though.

C4C: You can check out my latest work, which is inspired by some of the more thrashy stuff Nevermore creates, hope you enjoy!

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1477863
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Old 09-11-2011, 05:06 AM   #5
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crit as I go....

Intro- cool, but the dissonant parts aren't doing it so much for me. You should really tab out the drums correctly (instead of having all the spaces n such). Verse that comes in around 30 is pretty sick, although the transition at 41 could be better. Harmonies between 40-50 sound epic!

Ok this next part kind of sounds like daniel tievskys (sp?) song that he uploaded awhile ago....

solos are pretty crazy. WTF keyboard solo? not as melodic as us crackhead synths would usually play but cool.

the "melodic" section that starts around 105 is really awesome. Its uplifting, kind of jazzy, just awesome. Nice lead guitar going over it, the acoustic works well, and interesting chord choices for sure.

OK STOP EVERYTHING AND LISTEN TO ME RIGHT ****ING NOW!!!! the tenor sax solo at 129 is good but to make it orgasmically amazing, copy that part to another track and set one patch to Flute and one to Marimba (so they do a unison) it would sound SOOOO much more awesome!!!! trust me man just try it.

I liked the mood of the outro, some nice synths too. The melody comes full circle back to the heavier, more dissonant riff and a nice ending.

Overall a good song, I would say its genre goes far beyond what nevermore would usually stick to. The synths, bass, and tenor sax solo attest to that. If you were to change that from a tenor sax to Flute + Marimba, I think it would fit much better. Its obvious you put a lot of time and effort into this beast of a song, and it all flows together well. It evokes some wild emotions to me, also I think the name "Closing the Book" fits the mood of the song perfectly! 9/10 (i took a point off because it was a bit too packed/hectic and after the third listen i was starting to get confused with what i was hearing lol)

C4C? http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...94#post28104494
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Old 09-12-2011, 10:34 PM   #6
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Whew, cool. I was going to say, "Dude, this sounds a lot like Opeth!" which is good because I like Opeth, but some people hate it when you point out their influences, but then I noticed that you already noted that. Whew.

Anyways, I'm not sure how I feel about the intro... it's interesting, but I'm not sure if I like it for some reason.

The riff right after that is good, although I feel like that drum line would be pretty tiring to play! I like how you reintroduced certain elements from the intro here (or at least it sounds like you mutated it a bit and brought it back), sounds way more badass here.

Also, the part beginning at bar 27 is really cool. In fact, the song is really effin cool throughout, but from that point on it really kicks ass. Also, that lick in bar 115-116 is really spectacular. Second half of the song isn't as badass, but very good use of harmonies and progressions in creating a cool atmosphere.

C4C if you don't mind; it's more like At the Drive-In then Opeth.
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...00#post28115800
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Old 09-15-2011, 01:46 PM   #7
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Very Opeth indeed... And as an Opeth fan, I have to say this is one of the best things I've heard in this forum in a long time. Pure epicness, and it really shows how you put a lot of work into this song.

Riffage is great, the solos and melodies can be addicting at times, and pretty much everything about this is awesome. I have only one bad thing to say about this:
WHY THE HELL DO I HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS ON GP?
Go record it. Now. Thanks :P


Wanna return the crit?
http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1480045
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Old 09-15-2011, 04:00 PM   #8
RedDeath9
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Sorry I've been taking so long, it's just that school has started and I'm getting busier... I'll try to get to all the C4Cs soon. I never leave them undone, so don't worry
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Old 11-07-2011, 06:49 PM   #9
RedDeath9
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So, I finished C4C'ing everything a while ago. Sorry that it took so long. But hey! I stuck to my statement: I never leave them undone.

~Flounder~: I tried the marimba+flute thing, and while I thought the flute had potential, I wasn't sure what the marimba was supposed to add... I thought it kinda detracted from the whole "flowy" sound that part had. If that makes sense. But in any case... I didn't point this out in my first post or anywhere in the song, but those were actually meant to be vocals. Hence the sax. I didn't have lyrics or anything though, so it wasn't apparent.

I've got a new version up, it doesn't have any significant changes. Fixed snare volumes and some weird bass phrasing.
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Old 11-07-2011, 08:06 PM   #10
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Just listened to this. I sort of agree with STONESHAKER about the intro, I sort of like it but maybe it's not right for this song? Well I'm not too clued up on Opeth's louder stuff but I can hear some influence and I don't know anything about Nevermore, but this piece makes me think I should. The best part for me was definietely that first riff that comes on after the intro - wonderful. The song's highlights are definetely in the first half, but that first half is very good, you should try re-writing the song (or that's what i would do). I don't mean it's that bad, but I always find this helps me freshen up song structure/flow... to each their own!

C4C would be nice: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1494205
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Old 11-08-2011, 02:48 AM   #11
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The way it start is very good, kinda heavish, i like the drums. The harmony on those overdriven guitars sounds a little bit gloomy, i guess it was the point, however i like it.

27 - 31, i was expecting something like that but not this, this transcision put me into it

The riff is great, sounds a little bit like deathcore.

50 lol, this rain effect sounds great, but i guess at 59' is too much loud.

The little solo scares me up man, It was gloomy but it works on the context of the song

105, i like the chord progression, sounds epic... Good work there. It changes all the ambient of the song and put it into an epicish road...

153 i really dont like those chords, but i guess is a matter of taste

The way it begins was awesome, and i really have to say that the way it ends, it's so much better...

Good work.
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Old 11-11-2011, 09:01 PM   #12
RedDeath9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Emperor's Child
Just listened to this. I sort of agree with STONESHAKER about the intro, I sort of like it but maybe it's not right for this song? Well I'm not too clued up on Opeth's louder stuff but I can hear some influence and I don't know anything about Nevermore, but this piece makes me think I should. The best part for me was definietely that first riff that comes on after the intro - wonderful. The song's highlights are definetely in the first half, but that first half is very good, you should try re-writing the song (or that's what i would do). I don't mean it's that bad, but I always find this helps me freshen up song structure/flow... to each their own!

C4C would be nice: http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1494205


Well, the thing is, once I'm done with a song, it's absolutely finished. I COULD take riffs from it and use them in another song, but as far as this song goes... It's staying this way forever. I don't see a reason to go back to my finished songs because I'm careful to perfect them as I'm writing them. I'm also lazy as hell.
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Old 11-12-2011, 01:01 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RedDeath9
Well, the thing is, once I'm done with a song, it's absolutely finished. I COULD take riffs from it and use them in another song, but as far as this song goes... It's staying this way forever. I don't see a reason to go back to my finished songs because I'm careful to perfect them as I'm writing them. I'm also lazy as hell.
That's probably why I never finish anything
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