Freezer Burn

Meh, he said he'd run some stuff by me before he posted it. But you're right, I messed up. I should have told him to give everyone some notice. Didn't think he'd pull a defrocked... sorry all

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07/31/08

rgrockr

I'm a little wary of posting in here again, or if this question is appropriate here, but...

This girl broke up with me through text message about 2 weeks ago. I asked her a few times and tried calling her once or twice, but she won't really tell me why or give me a chance to discuss it. Now I'm just trying to get back a CD I lent her and she won't even let me come over to pick it up. What should I do?

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fail

I wrote a pretty lengthy post in the hugging thread, but tl;dr: how do you deal with jealousy, heartbreak, and all the despair that comes with it? I just want to get this person out of my mind and I want to stop liking him once and for all.

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MiserySignals11

It takes a very long time. I think your best bet is to instantly find a replacement to get your mind off her. I'm sure the new girl will relate.

Zephyr KL

You really want to date a 13 year old, don't you?

MiserySignals11

Dude way too young. Both of you. My advice is don't even think about dating till you're 18. You'll understand why when you're older. You have the rest of your life to date.

seeneyj

Sucks man, I can tell you why she busted up with you though. It all boils down to attraction, you weren't triggering enough of it. I'm assuming that you started doing everything that she wanted to do or came on to strong yes?
It's wussy behaviour that stops girls feeling attraction. (More on this if you want it)

She's got a term called 'buyer's remorse' about you because:
1. You displayed wussy behaviour
2. You were too creepy
3. You didn't demonstrate enough social value (More on this if you want)

Give it a couple of weeks to call her or wait till you see her in person.

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T00DEEPBLUE

I'm not sure if this is the exact thread i should be in, but what the hell.

I fell into unrequited love with this girl about 5 years ago. I've managed to move on from it somewhat (i'm starting afresh), but the negativity of such an experience still recurrs. It has caused me to do a lot of crazy and stupid shit. But at the same time, i've been grateful i did experience it, because i learned so much about myself and other people's feelings. In fact this whole experience completly changed my life and changed who i am.

I want to move on from what i had to go through, but because i have learned so much from this experience and because i feel that i have become a much more compassionate and understanding person, i fear that if i move on from her, i fear that i'll lose that part of me that is loving and compassionate.

I've found another person in my life but they're long-distance. they make me really happy and fulfilled, but i don't have the oppertunity to communicate with them often.

So anyway,

I fell in love with this girl and i learned a lot about my life from the experience. It has made me very depressed about my life, but the changes that the process made have helped make me a more lovable person. I fear that i will lose that caring side of me if i completly forget, i seemingly associate my love and kindness for this girl i fell in love with all those years ago.

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blake1221

Not trying to weasel my way out of anything, if I fucked up, I fucked up, but what is exactly the problem?

Just needed more time to ease the way into the new thread?



You've analyzed yourself, and can pinpoint the exact location where you learned. That's all well and good, but it also means you can separate what you learned from the teacher.

It's okay to let go, and at five years, I'd say it's time to do so. Don't worry about "losing yourself," you know exactly who you can be now. There's no excuse to lose anything from it. You need to live your life and be happy, and to do so, just let go of her.

It's going to be okay.




Cut your losses, homie. It sucks, but you can't always expect the right amount of closure, no matter how much you need it. You just have to learn when to walk away from the situation, and seeing how she's being so obstinate about it, it'd be better to just stop now.

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Saintly Rows||Drifter

T00DEEPBLUE

Thanks, Blake. I could elaborate on how she made me who i am, but it isn't really appropriate for this forum. The whole story is far too long to explain.

Thanks again.

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blake1221

Well, you know yourself best. I do know however, that sometimes your mind makes up reasons why you shouldn't let go, and it just becomes increasingly hard not to.

I still recommend you do so, but do what you feel is best in the end.

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thedefrockednun

What timing, eh? I break up with my girlfriend, two weeks later I start being more active again on the RT and now THIS:

I met an awesome girl. I hardly spoke to her cause she was a friend of one of my friends (also a girl) and we went to a club with LOADS of people. She has everything that my ex lacked (which led to the breakup). I felt butterflies in my stomach, shy, like I did when I was a small, shy, pubescent 14 year old.

IT FEELS GREAT!

THis girl is so great and I for some reason got a small (very small) feeling that she might like me a bit (despite only just meeting). If I look back, she doesn't show too many of the signs (except for being really shy, smiling only when I spoke to her, acting different with me than the other guys she'd just met; my mates).

Anyway, she's really cute, really pretty and my friend said she'd "drop a hint" to see if the girl might be in to me (maybe not the best idea but irreversible now).

If what I heard is true, she's very shy and doesn't have much (if any) of a relationship-past.

How should I go about this? I usually don't go for the shy girls. She's my friend's flatmate so the only way I can get to see her is if I visit my friend (even then there's not a huge chance of her being there).

My main problem is how I should go about this. I feel like she needs to know a little bit more about me than she already does (which is basically nothing), so I was thinking maybe add her on fb....but I don't wanna be too obvious and imposing. I don't wanna scare her away but I'm so infatuated right now that I just wanna get her number and ask her out :P

How should I go about it?




Pull a defrocked, is that a term now? What exactly are you referring to? :P

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seeneyj

That's good You don't need a reason to see her. Just ask her to hang out doing something mundane like IKEA. The more mundane, the better.
Basically just man up and do it, otherwise the moment is gone and you've lost all spontaneity and boring.
She'll open up over time and be less shy. Some of the craziest chicks I know, started out shy.

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JAHellraiser

no theres not also you like icp so shut up

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T00DEEPBLUE

I'll send you a few PM's.

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JAHellraiser

woah man. slow down, we're not saying go out and get yourself into another relationship right away. just get out there, chat with girls, flirt with ones you find attractive, get your mind off the past and into the present.

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Freezer Burn

I don't like upsetting Tom. He's like a big brother to me in these parts.



Oh you know what I mean.

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R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

Green_Ghoul

anyone care to pm me? i'm too embarrassed to post my situation at the moment. :'(

rockfan7

I honestly haven't found anyone attractive since, besides like, Carey Mulligan

I'm screwed.

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