|07-31-2012, 01:35 AM||#1|
Join Date: Oct 2008
Groove [Metal/Melodic/Thrash/Death] (GP5) C4C!
This song is something I wrote in about 3 days. The song is completely done and, I'd say, it's one of my better pieces. I can't really describe the genre cause I tend to mix a lot of metal styles, but I'd just call it metal.
Most of my influence was coming from bands like Sylosis, Soilwork, Trivium, tiny bit of Periphery and just other random shit along the way.
I'd love to hear your criticism guys and I'll for sure give out a bit of crit on your work too if you link me to it!
EDIT: updated with solo 2
Last edited by BloodReverence : 07-31-2012 at 01:23 PM.
|07-31-2012, 09:15 AM||#2|
Join Date: May 2009
The intro is a pretty solid melodeath-ish riff. However, I'm not sure what I think of bar 8-9. It feels a little bit out of place, and it kind of disrupts the flow. it might be that last quarter note that jars me.
I liked the verse riff, the high thingy in bar 23 was cool.
In the Filler-section, the vocal part might sound weird. I'm not completely sure (lol). It might sound better in real life, might just be the midi.
Not much to say about the chorus, it is what it is. It's a bit generic.
That was quite the right time to bring in the intro.
Feels like a Necrophagist solo, it's good. Those sweeps looks difficult though, haha.
Goes into chorus.
Clean part. Nice little piano. Not much to say really. It builds up nicely, and than releases. Quite the tease.
I really like the epic part. Nice use of chords and everything. Nice melodies. That re-use of the build-up at bar 120 felt a bit unnecessary though, it doesn't need to be there. I guess using it to get out of the epics at bar 132 is fine however.
Now, I think you just could have ended the song at bar 136, but it probably works just as good to end it with a last chorus.
Edit: I also think that you should lower the vocal part an octave and change it to an oboe or something.
If you'd be so kind. http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1552142
Last edited by CheesyMozarella : 07-31-2012 at 09:22 AM.
|07-31-2012, 12:51 PM||#3|
Join Date: Oct 2008
The extra build-up is there cause I want to include a solo in the repeat of the "epic chords" part. I've had troubles writing one so far, but hopefully i can fix that ahaha
I could see the vocal part in the filler sounding weird, I really wanted a static vocal line with some wide vibrato to kind of keep an creepy mood to it.
Chorus is generic but it's a chorus, they're supposed to be. As long as it's catchy, my goal has been accomplished
I'm glad you like the solo! It's definitely not my most tasteful but I think it works decently. As for the sweeps, it's just basic shapes ahaha so nothing too hard.
I thought it could end at 136 as well, but I didn't feel like the chorus was over-used yet and I also like the way it sounds now that it ends on there, but I do agree with you.
Thanks for the crit man, and i'm gonna go post mine on yours right away
|08-13-2012, 08:42 PM||#4|
Join Date: Aug 2006
It's a cool intro but I agree that bars 8-9 kinda kill the riff.
Main verse is a little boring except the leads that come in, they are pretty cool actually.
Filler is alright, not sure how I feel about the vocal keys though.
Chorus is cool if that's what you are going for. A little generic like said earlier.
Yeah the solo is cool but I didn't like the key it was in. Felt weird for this song to go into that augmented key.
The epic part is cool. It reminds me something that BTBAM would do a little. The solo and melodies in it are good too.
This isn't really my liking as far as music goes but it is a cool song.
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|08-14-2012, 05:06 AM||#5|
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Stockholm, Sweden
First off, I'm not really into thrash, so take my crit with a grain of sailt
So here we go!
1-7: Sounds quite all right until
8-9: which I believe you could make better, because right now (in my opinion) it makes the good riff a bit less good, sorry
20-28: Thrash, which I'm not a fan of, but the guitars are actually quite nice, sounded a little egyptian with the fills on the high notes
Filler: Sounds very dramatic, I love the strings here and then the transition works great with the chorus
Re-intro sounds surprisingly well, until the one part
Verse again sounds nice, but the drums sound sort of boring except for the fills
Solo 1: The rhythm guitars are great
Acoustic part is lovely
The epic part sounds great, the solo is really neat, the only problem I really have with the ending is that I would have ended the song at bar 137, the final chorus doesn't make sense to me seeing as the song sounds like it's already over
Hope this was a good enough crit! I'm sorry if I sounded harsh btw!
|09-14-2012, 08:25 AM||#6|
Join Date: Apr 2011
Intro riff is good.
To me the Main Verse part feels kind of forced into the song along with Solo 1. I know what you wanted to accomplish with it (change of the song's mood, add diversity etc.),
but to my ears it just wasn't right. You could use it to write another song though.
I like the Filler part, slightly atonal vocal harmonies create symphonic black metal-ish vibe. Cut bars 19-28 and listen how Enter Vox flows into Filler (it sounds pretty good to me) and if you like it copy it into the second verse.
Chorus is pretty good. A bit generic, but it's catchy.
The entire build-up part is amazing. Love the piano melody. The only thing I would change here would be 2/4 bar before Epic Chords. I would put rests instead of fade-ins because it sounds better to me (there's a huge epic build-up to the epic part and then at it's peak it suddenly stops and with fade-in effects replaced by rests Epic Chords part sounds more powerful because there's a moment of silence and then BOOM! Epic Chords are playing). Solo 2 really adds to the overall beauty of the song.
At first listen, I didn't like reintroduction of the last chorus and the last chorus, but after a few more listens it grew on me.
Overall, great work, wicked drum arrangements and cool ideas, except that it sounds a bit crammed at the parts I mentioned above.
|11-29-2012, 07:42 PM||#7|
Join Date: Aug 2010
wow.this was really groovy and crazy. i like the drums and the guitars. i think with real instruments it will sound better. i feel some melodic death influences,can it be?
the vocals sound weird,but i think it is a normaly thing fot this kind of music. the piano and the strings are great, they give an epic atmosphere to the song.
good stuff,man. i give you 8.5/10 .
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