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Old 09-18-2012, 09:58 AM   #1
left & leaving
NGD1313's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2006

and if i never get better
it's just as well
each word you speak is hell
colorless cheeks
ribboned lapels
the tale the tape hiss tells.

you are a defeated smile
hanging just below the eyes;
i am the off-chance
anybody notices

it is in this
small room
shoveling twenty years of snow
you and i will come to know
the nothing that is coming.
it is in this
wounded bird of a heart
i will finally apologize
but it will sound far too much
like goodbye.
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Old 09-18-2012, 12:49 PM   #2
Use Your Imagination
Factor13x's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Marion, Indiana
nice man, simple but good. my only issue is that the first verse just seems to have almost a little too much rhyming. but other then that its good
To The Grave
The Marionette
Our Last Dance
DaVinci Would Be Jealous
An Angel No More

Jackson DKXT Dinky
Silver Star Semi-Hollow Body
Peavey Vypyr 30w, 1 x 12 Combo Amp
Korg Nanopad
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Old 09-18-2012, 02:32 PM   #3
mon titre d'utilisateur
culex-knight's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: In the bucket at the end of time.
Please never stop posting. Thanks.

"Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear." - from Tao Te Ching
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