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Old 11-17-2012, 03:01 PM   #1
Something_Vague
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absolescence.

In the abscebe of all crutches,
mother mother mother or online poker
called it like us often or often not
the cause for everything exists in our hands
running through chainlink fences,
tearing the tips off each one

and we leave our blood on the border
to our neighborís home.

I remember barely swimming in adolescence,
worrying all the time
about whether Mikey was going to stab me
because I touched his dadís Amazing Spider-Man #2
and my fingers had acid on them, I was told at least.

The things touched are often forgotten
in the tongue, I canít remember the face
or the sound of the girl I once held hands with
in first grade, I want to say her name was Kimberly Laserbeam
but that canít be right.
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Old 11-17-2012, 06:05 PM   #2
rushmore
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last two paragraphs are spot on.

how is the book coming? or did you publish/in the process of publishing it?
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Old 11-17-2012, 06:41 PM   #3
Something_Vague
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waiting for my dickass friends to read the shit, same goes for my editor/publisher.

wanna read it? send me your e-mail.
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Old 11-17-2012, 11:19 PM   #4
rushmore
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Old 11-18-2012, 07:12 AM   #5
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The first two lines confused the hell out of me, to be completely honest. I didnt really feel that they connected with the rest, which was fantastic by the way. And if that offer is open to anyone, my email is smartalecg@hotmail.com
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Old 11-18-2012, 05:00 PM   #6
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ddebelisptc@gmail.com please

also,
piece itself solid as always. i hated the title nearly as much as i loved it.
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Old 11-18-2012, 05:10 PM   #7
Something_Vague
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sent novels to all, formatting issues aplenty, point them out if you want, don't really care. just enjoy it and read and let me know what you thought.
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Old 11-19-2012, 11:46 AM   #8
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I agree, the last two stanzas were fantastic. I'd enjoy reading anything more of yours;

ktjohnson9@gmail.com
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Old 11-19-2012, 11:57 AM   #9
Cyclones41
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Jesus I love your writing. This is really, really solid work man. (P.S. Your novel is really good so far, too!)
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Old 11-19-2012, 12:02 PM   #10
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wow if i were an e-mail spambot this thread would be fairly exciting. tip: when you're telling someone your e-mail address on a forum you're supposed to be like "johndoe AT website DOT com".
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Old 11-19-2012, 01:46 PM   #11
Something_Vague
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyclones41
Jesus I love your writing. This is really, really solid work man. (P.S. Your novel is really good so far, too!)


Thanks! Send me your thoughts through out reading it, I'd love to hear updates.
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Old 11-19-2012, 05:24 PM   #12
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I can't quite reach that first stanza, but the rest of this piece was really good. I'd read your novel but I've had barely any free time, and I don't think I'd give it the attention I believe it deserves. I may ask you for it or maybe just buy it in a couple of months.
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