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Old 11-04-2012, 04:01 AM   #41
seeneyj
Mr Sunglasses
 
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Location: A place where people with unbuttoned shirts & cool sunnies can roam free.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoxGetterxGuy
Little bit of honesty, little bit of real big dick.


Quote:
Originally Posted by satrionic1
if ur good looking and don't wanna waste time;

look straight in her eyes and just go "i really wanna make love to u", use a calm voice and a philosophical face too,

impossible this will not work. (tested)

if ur not,

then chances are pretty low, still it might depend on your talk. ofcourse if ur a rich basterd then ur a king.






seriously......wat....
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Old 11-04-2012, 04:03 AM   #42
Pagan_Poetry
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It's the pit giving dating advice, what do you expect?
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12th IN THE UG TOP 100 OF 2012
Quote:
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pagan poetry is a hermaphrodite


Quote:
Originally Posted by OVER9000VIDEOS

HhOLLY SUCKC **** LMFAOO
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Old 11-04-2012, 04:04 AM   #43
Ichikurosaki
bettr then u deal w/ it
 
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it's true though women are sluts so being vaguely attractive and/or having a penis is all you need
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Old 11-04-2012, 04:04 AM   #44
Pagan_Poetry
The Twilight Stoned
 
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Oh ok... I'll work on this.

Where can I get one of them penis things?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SanjePaCapota
pagan poetry is a hermaphrodite


Quote:
Originally Posted by OVER9000VIDEOS

HhOLLY SUCKC **** LMFAOO
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Old 11-04-2012, 04:45 AM   #45
chev311e
Will do moose stuff for $
 
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alcohol helps
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That's a beautiful dick, no homo.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:01 AM   #46
TunerAddict
Degenerate Halfwit
 
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You should make a woman of your own to have sex with. I mean, those two kids did it in that 80s movie and it all worked out for them.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:12 AM   #47
Jacques-Henri
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I'm Jewish, so them Jewettes just seem to flock to me... Shiksas as well...

Also, I own a bear (not even joking), and you don't need a gold berry to get one. Just an ancient Jewish prayer.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:13 AM   #48
SlackerBabbath
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacques-Henri
I'm Jewish, so them Jewettes just seem to flock to me... Shiksas as well...

Also, I own a bear (not even joking), and you don't need a gold berry to get one. Just an ancient Jewish prayer.


I thought that was a golem?
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:27 AM   #49
Harvey Swick
i am a ghost. fear me.
 
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the only real advice i have about females:

females are two of these three things: 1)Attractive 2)Single 3) Emotionally stable
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i often create feelings in others that they themselves/ do not understand

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You're a bad slut harvey.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:39 AM   #50
laid-to-waste
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be honest and heavy with feeling and attractive and smell good
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:40 AM   #51
SlackerBabbath
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harvey Swick
the only real advice i have about females:

females are two of these three things: 1)Attractive 2)Single 3) Emotionally stable

I can add to that.

The only thing that men and women have in common is that neither of them trust women.
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Old 11-04-2012, 05:54 AM   #52
Harvey Swick
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SlackerBabbath
The only thing that men and women have in common is that neither of them trust women.

very true.
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i often create feelings in others that they themselves/ do not understand

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You're a bad slut harvey.
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Old 11-04-2012, 06:16 AM   #53
adamgur96
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Location: On a Small Ugly Rock In Space, Surrounded By Over 7,000,000,000 Ignorant Cunts And Retąrds....... Status: If I Just Posted This Then I Probably Have Too Much Spare Time.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by meatjesus
i'm 18 but apparently unable to grow a decent bear, am i cursed?


I never grew a bear too, i bet it's hard.
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Old 11-04-2012, 06:59 AM   #54
Stugg334
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Dress real Topman, act real confident, be real funny, let them sip real vodka, get bare minge ting

#LivingInBristol2k12
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I picked up my guitar this morning and started playing next thing i know i cant stop playing In the key of A, the first letter or her name, I ended up recording a whole song in A.


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I like women with balls.
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Old 11-04-2012, 07:15 AM   #55
Highelf04
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I banter the shit out of them....
nuff said

Somehow it works sometimes....
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in the balls

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Old 11-04-2012, 07:19 AM   #56
Twist of fate
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I play the ladies "Smoke on the water" on my bass and that usually gets them so moist
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stop flirting you player twist of fate!


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Old 11-04-2012, 07:25 AM   #57
AtaBorMan
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Duct tape.
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If only I were the only one at home right now. I don't need my parents asking who Mr. Wiggles is.
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Old 11-04-2012, 07:31 AM   #58
eGraham
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pagan_Poetry
If we get married, don't forget to use striped berries to grow a ring bear!

Is this your own special way of saying "if you like it then you better put a ring on it"?









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I wish I was American.

Quote:
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is that like the jewish version of Jerry Seinfeld





I'm Ron ****ing Swanson
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Old 11-04-2012, 07:40 AM   #59
andyscoot
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Uh, this is cringeworthy.
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You'd touch the hand that's touching sin
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Old 11-04-2012, 09:05 AM   #60
Philip_pepper
UG's Dr Phil
 
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Location: Glasgae
Easy.

Just whip out the D when she least expect it.

Chicks love the D.
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An admirable impression, if I do say so myself.


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I now dub thee UG's Dr Phil. Screw that other guy.
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