edmodo23

So basically, i'm in a metalcore band, but we arent very good. Our bassist is fat with no stage presence, and he is a dick to everyone, not to mention he sucks at bass and plays a right handed bass even though he's left handed. We want to kick him out but he is our source for free food, so we have decided to keep him. He also gets up to "take a dump" in the middle of practice sessions, but we have recently realized he was lying, after our vocalist walked in on him masturbating in my bathroom.

We also have a rhythm guitarist with a cheep $150 guitar who tries to do crabcore, and his timing is so bad he always throws the band off. Not to mention during breakdowns he tries to solo off and it sucks major ass. He always gets mad at me because the riffs I write are too hard for him, so much to the point that he just cases his guitar and goes in the other room and complains about me.

I really think our band will go somewhere, but I really want to get through these problems, I want us to get along. Any advice?

Metasponge

but nah, if you really have this much to complain about, what makes you think you can go somewhere as a band? How long have you been a band so far?

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edmodo23

March 2011

raoooos

I don't.

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DIRTSMUGGERS

adamgur96

It'll be fine, kindergarten is always hard.

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theogonia777

You aren't very good, but you think your band will go somewhere?

But yeah, if you are having problems like that, kick those guys to the curb. There is clearly a conflict in terms of musical style, ability, and personality, and with these you will never be able to get anything done, even just for fun.

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Neo Evil11

Wait, so the bassist is fat and goes of for a wank during practice and doesn't shut the door, and you accept this as long as he gives you free food? What kind of freak band are you in? You're like a food prostitute.

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RetroGunslinger

Bravo I thoroughly enjoyed reading that, although wtf is crabcore? Does everyone walk around the stage sideways?

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edmodo23

I'm getting really annoyed by our bassist though, I had to clean the ****ing semen, and he cant play any of the riffs I write so he just plays open notes. I always have to tab it out for him
Also we dont have a drummer, so it is frusterating

edmodo23

Its when you squat down during a breakdown and bang your head like crazy

adamgur96

Quit that shit!

And stop cleaning semen after your fat friend.

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theogonia777

And "[you] really think [your] band will go somewhere?"

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To die without leaving a corpse... That is the way of us Garo.

Tranny Stuff (May 2nd) | Soundcloud | Now you have no excuse... | Just a thought...

AJScott

Non convincing troll is non convincing.

Metasponge

He sounds like a total wanker.




















(ba-dum-tss)

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kaptink

I think you need to film your practice sessions. So we can understand better...

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Neo Evil11

Ok the semen thing went too far. He's a troll.

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mikeYekim

hahahahaha

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badfish_lewis

If you keep going like you guys are you will definitely get signed. I heard that Simple Plan, Good Charlotte and One Direction all had the same problems and then poof they got signed. So don't worry about your fat masturbating bassist or your guitar player who can't play guitar, EMI will make it happen!

crazysam23_Atax

Here's my advice. Leave your band. Stay friends with them if you want. But do your own project. Become a solo artists. You can set up a home studio for less than $500. Then, if you wish, put up classifieds and ask people to play riffs that are complicated enough to show their skill but not too complex to play in an impromptu audition.

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