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Old 01-16-2013, 09:13 PM   #1
GirlGerms
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"Kill Your Friend" - grungy/punk/angry female (C4C)

Hey guys I'd appreciate it if you can check out this song and tell me what you think. I wrote and played all the instruments. I will also comment on your stuff if you link me to it! What do you feel about this song?

Kill Your Friend
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Old 01-16-2013, 11:00 PM   #2
tukk04
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Overall, pretty good! Though I hear more of a new wave style in the songwriting than grunge. The production sounds appropriate for the type of song you seem to be aiming for, but I didn't hear any bass guitar, was that intentional or not?

The only thing I'd say could make the song better would be to add a couple more of the call-response style lines to the pre-chorus and make that the chorus, it's much catchier than your current chorus. Then either make the chorus a bridge or scrap it and maybe move the parts around some so the song would go more like:

2-line Verse
Chorus (old pre-chorus)
4-line Verse
Chorus
Bridge (old chorus)
2-line Verse (cut so it's just voice+drums or vox+bass+drums and then have the guitars explode back into the...)
Chorus
Ending

That seems like it'd flow better.

My shit's in my sig, but don't feel obligated, I was attracted by your thread title not the C4C. Good song though, seems like you'd have fit right into the 90's riot grrl scene.

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Last edited by tukk04 : 01-16-2013 at 11:11 PM.
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Old 01-16-2013, 11:20 PM   #3
RedMist
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I like the sound. Not a fan of the lyrics.
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Old 01-17-2013, 07:57 PM   #4
GirlGerms
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tukk04
Overall, pretty good! Though I hear more of a new wave style in the songwriting than grunge. The production sounds appropriate for the type of song you seem to be aiming for, but I didn't hear any bass guitar, was that intentional or not?

The only thing I'd say could make the song better would be to add a couple more of the call-response style lines to the pre-chorus and make that the chorus, it's much catchier than your current chorus. Then either make the chorus a bridge or scrap it and maybe move the parts around some so the song would go more like:

2-line Verse
Chorus (old pre-chorus)
4-line Verse
Chorus
Bridge (old chorus)
2-line Verse (cut so it's just voice+drums or vox+bass+drums and then have the guitars explode back into the...)
Chorus
Ending

That seems like it'd flow better.

My shit's in my sig, but don't feel obligated, I was attracted by your thread title not the C4C. Good song though, seems like you'd have fit right into the 90's riot grrl scene.



Cheers for your feedback! I really appreciate it! I checked out your stuff too (I will check out all of your songs actually since I'm intrigued by your post-grungy sound) and commented on a few tracks. Again, thank you so much for your feedback!

And cheers @RedMist too!
__________________
*SUPERFUZZED*



"I'm just a*Stardog Champion*...
I'm a
*Stardog Champion*
I'm a
* Stardog* baby...
I ain't gonna let ya down, yeah
I'm gonna let ya down.
"
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Old 01-17-2013, 08:50 PM   #5
DancesWithSheep
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Caught my attention right away.

What does this remind me of???

I would pull the vocals out of the mix a tad more - like to really understand the in your face lyrics.

Interesting and well put together - not much to crit here!

If you want to waste a minute or two -

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1583381
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Muchos gracias, muchachos modernos!
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Old 01-18-2013, 12:24 AM   #6
aaron aardvark
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GirlGerms,
The lyrics scared me (I read some of them before listening), until I heard the song. Because the song is not hard core, it strikes me as something with a sense of humor (I hope). The intro reminds me of early Sid Barret Pink Floyd (a compliment). Vocals are pretty good, just slightly pitchy at times. Nice to hear an English accent (Brits, don't hide the accent!). Instrumentally, everything sounds good to me! Audio quality is well done. Turn that frown up-side-down! Don't kill anyone and stay out of both jail & hell! Yay! Please review my music at this link (did I ever mention I've been played on the radio BBC?):

http://www.ultimate-guitar.com/foru...d.php?t=1581578
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