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Old 01-21-2013, 08:53 PM   #1
nunu
An Ideal Revenge baby!
 
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Join Date: May 2005
Location: New York
Cold Breakfast Dates (rock, acoustic, youtube video)

So I just had a breakup this weekend. She broke up with me, if you were wondering. On the plus side, It did give me some inspiration to make some new music. #winning.

Don't worry, its not really a sappy or sad song. Check out the video. Lyrics are on the youtube page. C4C.

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Last edited by nunu : 01-21-2013 at 08:57 PM.
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Old 01-22-2013, 01:29 PM   #2
Zerath
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Thanks for the review!

I really like the vibe of this song! I like the girls voice in the beginning and the male voice fits the song well too. I do not however, like the techno-ish kick drum in the beginning.

I think that a better flow in the vocal melody half-way through the song could greatly improve it, as well as a big chorus with some nice electric guitar to it - but that's just my opinion

Last edited by Zerath : 01-22-2013 at 01:31 PM.
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Old 01-23-2013, 03:10 PM   #3
CarsickPhil
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Dear Nunu
Good start. Loved the way the main tune and rhythm cut in at 44s. Bit too much cymbal clash for me in places which sort of washed across the music, but this is a small point. Good combination of vocals. Building on Zerath's point, I think that an icy clear high-pitched solo soaring above would be good at some point, but this is personal taste. Overall, the song definitely worked. It tells its story well and involves the listener. Excellent.
Best wishes
Phil

PS You asked about the tuning on my piece of music. The guitar is in open d to facilitate slide playing. I used minor chords and minor scale for bits. I also tried the Phrygian (or Spanish) scale which gives a sort of eastern sound to some of the passages (I had to look it up to find out what it was called; it just sounded nice to me).
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Old 01-24-2013, 11:31 PM   #4
nunu
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Sorry guys i dont have the ability record any electric instruments lol. I recorded everything on my acoustic guitar and using my built in laptop. The bass is really just my acoustic guitar too! Much love though, so thanks!

Are my vocals (male) good though?
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