Go Back   UG Community @ Ultimate-Guitar.Com > Music > Songwriting & Lyrics
User Name  

Old 03-04-2013, 11:39 AM   #1
Registered User
microwaveramen's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2013

hows this sound

Verse 1
Shut your mouth
Go away
I know what
You want to say
Donít you try
To make me cry
I know itís
All a lie
Tissue box
Stolen by the fox
Gotta leave now
Before the door locks

All these times Iíve failed in the things I do
Impossible to tell whoís screwed who
Now Iím in the hole with all the time Iíve spent
No way for me to pay off this debt

Verse 2
Running through the fog
Sleeping like a log
Mind is stuck
Like a rusty cog
And hell-bent
I threw out
The letters you sent
Iím confused
You are too
We are stuck
In place with glue


Verse 3
For the dents
Living in
The past tense
A second chance another glance
Dodge the blow
From the lance
Trust yourself
Nobody else
Donít ever
Ask for help


Verse 4
Empty cup
Donít look up
Enoughís enough
Falling down
Run outta town
Look for me
In the lost and found
Her perfume
Caused you to swoon
But it led
To your doom
microwaveramen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2013, 01:22 PM   #2
The Pit's Medical Advisor
JustRooster's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2005
Keep working on it, bud. It honestly sounds pretty forced and sorta corny. Work on making it sound more conversational.

2012 Fender American Deluxe Stratocaster
2015 Bob Logan Custom Esquire
1999 Fender American Standard Stratocaster
2012 G&L Tribute Classic
Vox AC15C1
Fender Rivera Concert II Reverb
Peavey Valveking 212
JustRooster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2013, 12:08 PM   #3
Registered User
microwaveramen's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2013
ok thanks
microwaveramen is offline   Reply With Quote

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:30 PM.

Forum Archives / About / TOS / Advertise with us / Customer Support / Ultimate-Guitar.Com © 2015
Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.0.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.