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Old 10-10-2013, 12:47 AM   #1
thiscoldblack20
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The Pale

Death metal lyrics for my band \m/

LET DEATH RISE!!!!!
LET HIM RISE!!!!

The ground shakes
and the earth begins to separate
Blood falls from the skies
A crimson flash
lacerates the atmosphere
And people start to die

A black robe
Rises from the earth's wounds
We know are time is forthcoming
A force as strong as it's will
And just as deadly as foretold
In lore as old as time

LET DEATH RISE!!!
****-ING RISE!!!!

It starts as one
then quickly multiplies
A home ,a city, a state.
Blood and gore fill the streets
of each city
Every man, woman and child

WILL ****ING DIE!!!
****ING DIE!!!

Looking down from his steed
smiling from ear to ear
content with the wreckage in his wake
He throws his head back
releasing maniacal laughter
with a hint of nihilistic glee

Now the earth is black
And the rivers run red
This world has been annihilated
His deed has been done
The time has begun
To rebuild this world anew!!!

NOW THAT DEATH HAS RISEN!!!!
WE HAVE ****ING FALLEN!!!
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Old 10-10-2013, 01:45 AM   #2
21wickwing
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This is a suitable heavy metal song.

However, the whole death to all, apocalypse, thing is a bit cliche in the genre.

My suggestion would be to take this an focus on something small within it. Focus on the blood raining from the sky and create a haunting scene where that is the setting so to speak. Personally, I prefer this style, and I think many do. Most people, myself included, start by writing such big picture, grandiose poems but the real beauty comes out in a specific, small part of the big picture, poem.

Just my two cents Keep on Writing! You have potential!
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Old 10-10-2013, 12:29 PM   #3
thiscoldblack20
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Thanks man. I know it's cliche but, it came to me so fast and the description is very haunting. Who doesn't like a song in dropped Ab tuning that's have as hell and about death coming out and killing everyone. Think of the cleansing of the world so to speak. This is part 4 of a 4 part mini concept within my bands demo.
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