Go Back   UG Community @ Ultimate-Guitar.Com > Music > Recordings > Tabs & Chords
User Name  
Password
Search:

Reply
Old 02-20-2008, 01:14 PM   #1
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
[GP5, GP4, MIDI] VII Days - C4C!

*REMEMBER TO CHECK THE LATEST POST FOR UPDATES*

So, basically I started writing these lyrics about a man who fell into a coma after a car crash and is now trapped in his owm mind for seven days. In these seven days he goes through all kinds of things like desperation, acceptense, and finally letting go since he is convinced there is a life after this one.

I have currentyl only writing the opening entitled "Overture" and it ends on 3:14 minutes so I feel I'm of to a pretty good start. The first verse of the second day "Remember" clocks in at 3:14.

I will post the lyrics once they're fleshed out and re-worked

Remember this is just a sketch, I will keep refining the music as I go on.

C4C!
Attached Files
File Type: zip VII DAYS.zip (8.6 KB, 84 views)
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song

Last edited by Ceresz : 02-21-2008 at 11:11 AM.
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 01:18 PM   #2
Corpse.of.Dark
Metalist
 
Corpse.of.Dark's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Into the Water.
where is the gp5,gp4 and midi?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalMilitia212
Right, and instead of playing Tekken, go out and join a martial arts tournament! While your at it, put down that NES controller and go jump on some real turtles, pussy..
Corpse.of.Dark is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 01:22 PM   #3
Carl6661
UG Freak
 
Carl6661's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Kent, UK.
i'll crit as soon as you've put the files on here the story of it sounds brutal though!
__________________
Below is a link to a load of half-arsed recordings of mine.
www.soundcloud.com/carlrussellmusic

I don't like Avenged Sevenfold anymore. I was 14 when I joined & the 6661 in the username seemed a great idea at the time. Sigh.
Carl6661 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 01:25 PM   #4
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Sorry guys, it's up now
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 01:35 PM   #5
Corpse.of.Dark
Metalist
 
Corpse.of.Dark's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Into the Water.
sounds good so far. keep up the good work.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalMilitia212
Right, and instead of playing Tekken, go out and join a martial arts tournament! While your at it, put down that NES controller and go jump on some real turtles, pussy..
Corpse.of.Dark is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 01:37 PM   #6
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Thanks, I will
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 02:15 PM   #7
Carl6661
UG Freak
 
Carl6661's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Kent, UK.
sounds pretty cool so far! keep it up!

so far, 8/10
__________________
Below is a link to a load of half-arsed recordings of mine.
www.soundcloud.com/carlrussellmusic

I don't like Avenged Sevenfold anymore. I was 14 when I joined & the 6661 in the username seemed a great idea at the time. Sigh.
Carl6661 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 02:37 PM   #8
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Thanks! Hopefully I will post an update tonight
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2008, 07:04 PM   #9
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Okay, here's an update on Day II. Enjoy!

Oh, and since "Day II" is basically done, here are the lyrics:

Day II
Awaken by the sound
Of birds singing
Awaken only to find
Iím still asleep

As I walk through this maze
Through my own mind I gaze
From birth to the end of the day
Before the accident

The moon was burning
And my mind was yearning
Suddenly from the distance
Came the end of my existance

Darkness before my eyes
Several hours went by
And somewhere a child cries
Asking himself why

He leans on his motherís shoulder
She tryies to calm him down
He ask her why the world is so cruel?
She hugs him tighter and tighter

Iím losing control of my body
Going number by every second
I feel the end isnít far away
Atleast I have no regrets

People approach me
Looking conserned
People approach me
Asking me questions

Faces surround me
Calling for help
Faces surround me
As I drift away


EDIT:

Alright, I have fleshed out "Day III" and "Day IV" now so check the updates, C&C, and enjoy!

Oh, and here are the lyrics for both of these days Again, I will keep on changing them


Day III
Asleep forever
Trapped within my own mind
Escape I will never
A door out I wonít find

I look around
And scream for help
But thereís no one there
No one there to answer me

Help me, save me
Open the door
I donít wanna be
Stuck here anymore



Day IV
I walk through this maze
Searching for guidance
My life on displays
Regret, and sorrow closing in

Iím tired even though Iím sleeping
Iím awake even though Iím sleeping

I pound my fist on the walls
My life is fading
These walls are invading
Iím so afraid

How long have I been here?
How long will I stay?
How will I get out?
How could this happen?

Give me an answer!
Give me some faith!
Give me the key!
Give me a sign!

I run as far as I can
I run for as long as I can
I stumble and fall
But nothing will stop me

Desperation I feel
Iím losing my mind
Desperation wonít heal
Keep losing my mind

My eyes are filled with tears
And my lugns are filled with dust
I scream but the only one answering
Is me

Desperation I feel
Iím losing my mind
Desperation wonít heal
Keep losing my mind
Attached Files
File Type: zip VII DAYS - UPDATE.zip (12.7 KB, 67 views)
File Type: zip VII DAYS - UPDATE II.zip (20.7 KB, 52 views)
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song

Last edited by Ceresz : 02-20-2008 at 09:59 PM.
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-21-2008, 12:56 PM   #10
Satanisk666
Pure Holocaust
 
Satanisk666's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Australia
The intro has a very, asian feel to it. i don't know how to describe. It's awesome. Day two is by far my favorite part.
__________________
"Glory is fleeting, obscurity is forever"
Satanisk666 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-2008, 07:45 PM   #11
Broadsword
The Wild Rover
 
Broadsword's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: In the grip of winter
Crit:

To sum this up, I'd call this one hell of a (potential) progressive feast. The riffs flow together very nicely - with a big salute to some top-notch drumming. There were interludes aplenty, but used tastefully; there were heavy riffs, groovy riffs, soft riffs; there were good leads. The music complemented the lyrical theme, and vice versa. In short, any fan of any prog could easily dig this, as do I.

However, there really only was maybe a couple of true eye-openers. I realize that the song is only just over half completed, but when constructing an epic, there needs to be certain moments that just "take" you somewhere, grab your attention ruthlessly, and enthralls you and tell you who's big daddy. I'm not saying there isn't any great parts; it's obvious there is, and you know how to handle and execute them. But so far, it's lacking that one final epic ingredient. Like I said, there's still three more "days" left, so anything can happen.

Besides that, there's a few little things that I must point out. The use of synth + guitar, in my opinion, is somewhat overused. Don't get me wrong, it's a great effect - that is, if it's used sparingly. But you have chains of riffs that are synth-soaked. There's just some parts where I want the guitar, not synth; in most cases, the synth is all you can hear. The bass is also too quiet. I turned it up to about 14-15 and by doing so added much more to the song; once again, in my opinion.

All in all, it's excellent so far, and currently has potential to be an extraordinary epic. 8.5/10 at this point in time. I will most definitely give another crit once this is finished. Good job.

Broadsword is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-2008, 07:53 PM   #12
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Thank you very much for your crit I will take it all into consideration when writing the rest of the piece. I'm thinking of adding some timpani and maybe a choir to make it more epic. We'll have to see about that
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song

Last edited by Ceresz : 02-22-2008 at 07:57 PM.
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-29-2008, 04:02 PM   #13
Ceresz
Wannabe
 
Ceresz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sweden
Alright here's a small update, enjoy, and please crit
Attached Files
File Type: zip VII DAYS - UPDATE III.zip (27.4 KB, 56 views)
__________________
C4C!
VII Days
Untitled Song
Ceresz is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:09 AM.

Forum Archives / About / Terms of Use / Advertise / Contact / Ultimate-Guitar.Com © 2014
Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.0.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.