MLP-5SKB Review

manufacturer: Monterey date: 09/18/2007 category: Electric Guitars
Monterey: MLP-5SKB
The MLP-5SKB is from their Grafix line. The MLP-5SKB is just like a typical LP ripoff. But worse.
 Sound: 2
 Overall Impression: 2
 Reliability & Durability: 2
 Action, Fit & Finish: 1
 Features: 3
 Overall rating:
 3 
 Reviewer rating:
 2 
 Users rating:
 4 
 Votes:
 6 
review (1) 23 comments vote for this gear:
overall: 2
MLP-5SKB Reviewed by: Tummaenkeli, on september 18, 2007
4 of 4 people found this review helpful

Features: Never heard of Monterey? They are the kings. In their own way. They are unbelievably talented at making really good acoustic guitars. And are also unbelievably talented at making cool looking electric guitars that make the same sound you would get by rubbing a cat against a cheese grater. My buddy Tim knew I had a Monterey acoustic, and told me he had 2 of their electrics I could have. "Awesome!" I thought. This was the first of the two. The MLP-5SKB is from their Grafix line. Here's a wide range of pictures, ranging from women to spiderman. Is that hyphenated? The MLP-5SKB is just like a typical LP ripoff. But worse. The tuners don't turn. The pickups say '3 single coil pick-ups' but no guitar should have to have the volume on 10 to get any noise. It seems to have all the lower-Standard features. A crappy neck. Four useless knobs you'll never turn. 22 frets of unsatisfaction. And a bridge that's about as useful as that Brady Bunch kid. You know the one. On the bright side, it looks cool, even if it's so shoddily made it falls apart if you lift it up. And it does make a noise. Though I don't know if it's any better than it would sound with no strings at all. I got a free pick with it, too. It was something like a.35. Which was just brilliant, as I play with.88's. Who wants a pick that you could tear in half? // 3

Sound: The options that switching pickups give you is astonishing. They have 'sounds bad', treble, 'also sounds bad', apparently meant to be bassier, and the medium ground, which I think is called 'oh-god-please-hack-at-my-ears-with-an-axe'. No amount of distortion can fix this sound. It's always too high and whiney, the only music you could replicate with this would be the smashing sound made as you beat this guitar against a table. If guitars were toilet bowls, this is that one toilet bowl. You know, that one. The one with the yellow water and the poo caked onto the sides that have been there since the day the toilet was made? That's what this guitar is. On a serious note, the guitars pickups are so basic I think that blind amputees with autism could have done better. // 2

Action, Fit & Finish: The bridge and pickups wobbled so much I was expecting the be able to lift them actually off the guitar. The neck is so unstable that you could take it off the guitar and use it as a club. The skulls were pixelated (badly) in some places and there was this small, sharp shard of 'something' jutting out of the side of the headpiece. So this guitar doubles as a handaxe, eh? About all it's useful so. // 1

Reliability & Durability: The body seems to be made out of a mixture of chewing guy, tree sap and Saliva. You could cough on this guitar and it would implode into itself. It's really badly done, and I think I should mention that the action was about 1.5 cm off the fretboard. Like, Ow! You couldn't play through a gig with this guitar without needing a blood transfusion or two. However, there is a plus. The tuners can pretty much be pulled off the guitar. Oh, sorry. I guess there are no good things to say. // 2

Overall Impression: It would be perfect for my musical style, if my musical style was attempting to make glass objects break with high-pitch ringing. I would be crying and pitying the thief. The sound, look, feel, features, and decency of a normal guitar. You think they would stop this halfway and say, "No, man. This sucks the big one." But of course not. No metaphor I can think of can describe this guitar. Please avoid it. For you musical soul. And mine. // 2

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