5 Metal Albums To Avoid

Metal albums that put the genre to shame.

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Well, I've heard a lot of good music in my so far short life, but I've heard a lot of bad music too. Everybody has and that's the point of this article. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the worst Metal albums in history!

Number 5: Metallica and Lou Reed - "Lulu"

I'm not sure what Metallica were thinking when they decided to release this album. It's not that it's necessarily terrible, more like the ultimate definition of weird. Lou Reed's vocals don't help either.

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Number 4: Motley Crue - "Saints of Los Angeles"

I can't really say anything specific about The Crue's latest studio effort, but I found myself liking this album less than the albums with the guy who wasn't Vince Neil, whose name I have erased permanently from my memory. I'm kind of glad the band is saying goodbye next year and for the record, I actually enjoyed 1980's Motley Crue.

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Number 3: Deftones - "Covers"

I liked some of this album, but then again, I'm a big New Wave music fan. I doubt anyone who isn't a big New Wave music fan could enjoy this at all.

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Number 2: Limp Bizkit - "Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water"

The title sounds dumb enough, but the entire album is pretty much self-parody, enjoyable by maybe the top three percent of Rap Rock fans, the rest will probably think this album is garbage. It is.

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Number 1: Lostprophets - "The Fake Sound of Progress"

This is the single worst album ever, not even just in Metal music. It's a wall of noise. I cannot distinguish between instruments, or even understand what the lyrics are.

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There you go. I hope everyone enjoyed this trip through the dumpsters of musical filth. Feel free to submit your own picks in the comments below.

80 comments sorted by best / new / date

    bradd101
    This is the most stupidly opinionated piece of crap I have ever read. You can't distinguish between anything on Fake Sound of Progress? Well that's your own problem, you must have an issue with your hearing. Damn, it's hardly the best album in the world and I'm not saying you have to like it, but worst album in the world? There are far, far, FAR worse albums than this. Christ. This was a stupid article.
    Abacus11
    Yeah, this list is stupid even by UG List standards. It looks like someone spent about 10 minutes on it and even less time thinking about it.
    xlog
    It's a shame to write such articles. Expect for lulu all albums here are ok, if it's not great. This guys don't deserve to write articles here.
    takenthecannoli
    What amused me was that even Lostprophet's biggest critic at least gave the album credit for having distinguishable instrumentals. From AllMusic: "The only redeeming quality is the great production by Michael Barbiero, that allows all instruments to be heard perfectly in all their ennui-inducing glory, proving that no matter how much you polish up a turd, it's still a turd."
    Reages
    Yep, i was really shocked when i saw FSOP there, that album is legendary.
    Deltast0rm
    Ultimate Guitar, what are you telling your writers to write? This list of "I don't like this album but I guess that's just my opinion" isn't entertaining, it isn't informative - what it is is masturbatory writing that you'd expect perhaps from a nine year old. Maybe if Ultimate Guitar edited or vetted their writers we'd have a different kind of expectation when it comes to this section of the site. I can't believe this is the face of guitar music on the Internet. It's a shame.
    crazysam23_Atax
    You do realize that UG doesn't really have a roomful of paid writers, right? Users submit articles, and the CC's approve them. That's how it works.
    Cavalcade
    I got an email from UG with some "ideas" for article topics, and a not-so-subtle hint that these topics were what they wanted from their writers. They aren't completely blameless in all this; they actively encourage people to write easily digestable, but ultimately pointless, list articles like this. So deltast0rm's question is more relevant than you might think.
    daken_1
    You just put a DEFTONES album in a worst metal albums list?? Oh no you didn't. How about Bullet for My Valentine's most recent album (not saying the rest of their stuff isn't crap but this one was especially garbage)? That's better than Deftones? Btw if cover albums count now, I can name numerous worse than that. Ok rant over
    chords7
    I strongly agree with this. I enjoy the deftones' covers because they're not what you'd expect. For the most part, I think they do a pretty good job especially with songs like Drive, Caress, and No ordinary Love. And cover albums count? I don't think that even remotely counts as a collection of songs that can be called 'the worst metal ever.'
    Mr Winters
    "It's a wall of noise. I cannot distinguish between instruments, or even understand what the lyrics are" I'd say getting your ears checked would be a good idea.
    Sandman4991
    You know, it's kind of boring. Lulu is history. There is no point in writing about it every week.
    m4ss3 m/
    I can kinda see why Chocolate Starfish is on this list, but I still love it because of the riffs (inb4, there's no riffs). One of the best nu-metal albums of all-time.
    Krieger91
    Yep, definitely. It's a shame how Limp Bizkit is hated 'cause of Fred durst when the intrumental part of the band are nothing short of brilliant. Also, awfully biased pointless article, in my opinion.
    Shadow-Michel
    How's Limp Bizkit metal?
    felipe.acf
    nowadays even green day is considered metal, **** logic
    bradd101
    Green Day have never been considered metal....
    ironman316
    Not literally just green day, he's saying that a lot of people call bands metal even though they're far from it.
    bradd101
    Ah ok, the age old issue of sarcasm being difficult to gauge in the written/typed form haha
    ATluecxk
    That Lostprophets album kickstarted a ton of British bands' careers, some of which are world beaters now. Saying it's the worst metal album ever is a joke, it hasn't aged well but so have plenty of others. Too opinionated, this.
    SkepsisMetal
    Oh look, someone in the world has an opinion. How innovative... Seriously though? Deftones and TFSOP in a worst albums list? Get out with your "new wave fan" bullshit
    slayer_rule_\m/
    'Author: 'N3WW4V3N1NJ4' Says it all really... I think any should be able to write articles on here but for UG to post this on the facebook page? There needs to be a better team to filter the crap.
    Cavalcade
    UG doesn't get that many articles to begin with. They have to take what they can get. Besides, "controversial" articles are perfect click-bait, which means more ad money.
    Markiole
    Well, we may not have found out what the worst five metal albums of all time are, but we've certainly found one of the five worst journalists. I'd be better off going to Kerrang than reading any more of this tripe.
    planet.nelson.1
    Agreed, however "Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water" has "My Generation" in it !!! Not the best but a pretty good song.
    Cold Reader
    Limp Bizkit's Chocolate Starfish album has incredible production and some great songs have come off it. The first single I ever bought was Shinobi vs. Dragon Ninja from Fake Sound of Progress. The album was average, but it defiantly wasn't metal.
    awsomebadas5
    am i really the only one person in the world how thinks lulu isn't that bad? i mean, its just different, people think metallica and metal but lulu was a musical experiment witch i respect and like to a certain degree.
    sloppyjoe24
    How was Sexhavin nowhere on this list with the Abortionist or Sperm Transfusion? Obviously very little research was done.
    sergio.tacorian
    Can't believe they're dissing The Fake Sound of Progress. Gotta be one of the most amazing new metal albums EVER.
    daken_1
    Btw Deftones used in the same article as the phrase: "the dumpsters of musical filth"? You make me sick sir.
    stoltobot
    Thanks for letting me know Deftones released a covers album. How did that slip by me?
    Quetzlcoatl
    I'm guessing the writer of this article only listens to music which is deemed "popular" within the rock/metal circles. If he/she listens to more than what the radio is feeding him/her, this list would be nothing like it is now. There are so much worse albums out there. It's true these aren't the best around but come on.
    N3WW4V3N1NJ4
    Since I submitted this article two weeks ago, my opinions have changed...I'm even ashamed and don't like that this article is here
    BledGhostWhite
    If you write a list, post it on the internet, and come to change your mind and regret the list in 2 weeks, you obviously didn't put much thought into the list. This article was fxcking trash.
    Emenius Sleepus
    all of these albums are awful, but essentially none of them are metal. bleh. Morbid Angel - Illud Divinum Insanus, Cryptopsy - The Unspoken King, Bathory - Octagon, Sarcofago - The Worst, Slayer - Diabolus In Musica. All much more fitting candidates
    EatMyBassLix
    I've just discovered lostprophets thanks to this, I really like the album posted here, OP is a fail.
    FlyingPirahna
    oh man you put deftones on here bad move bro I'd defend it but I don't really feel like being 'that guy' today.
    SB_79
    This is the most pointless Article to date - if you are going to have a Metal Albums to avoid article - at least put some thought into it. Have valid reasons rather than just some meanderine opinion around - I like it less and less... and can't distinguish. There are far worse albums out there than this lot. Lulu is a concept album and shouldnt really be considered a metal album anyway. Limp Bizkit may not be everyones cup of tea, but I think the number may be higher than 3% given the sales it generated. Unfortunately there is no control over what articles get written on here.
    onkel44
    i should have avoided this article... period, too late now i guess. gonna "thumb down" on this :-P
    The_Dayman
    This is without a doubt a terrible idea for an article. There's no need for you to whine about your least favorite metal albums here. But you really think these are the 5 worst metal albums? Are you serious? There's been a lot of shitty articles on this site, but damn, dude.
    sovi
    LoL what an objective opinion of journalist ..... vote -
    cam6389
    I disagree a little with this. I'll start off by saying first that 'Lulu' gets bad rap from people. Sure it's not metallica and it's not velvet underground, it's something completely different, and yes, it does have its weirdness, but it also has some killer riffs in there as well. Limp Bizkit's entry I think was a bit premature. I'm sure there's worse metal albums than 'Chocolate starfish'. To be honest, that was the first album I ever brought with my own money. It was the first record that opened my eyes to how ****ing powerful music can be and made me open my eyes to the world of rock music. An 11 year old kid would be in awe of Wes's guitar and the relentlessness of Fred's lyrics. For that reason this album will forever be close to me. The other entries. I haven't heard. And don't really interest me in the slightest.
    Absurder22
    Fucking Lost Prophets? What the ****ing ****. And Limp Bizkit and Deftones? Shut the **** up, you don't know what metal is and you should probably stop now.
    Absurder22
    Hell, I wouldn't even count Lulu or Saints as Metal albums. man you suuuuuck.
    fanapathy
    Listened to the first few tracks of that Lostprophets album since it was linked, don't like the vocal style (clean and screaming together) but think the music sounds quite alright
    Jonagorn
    If this is what metal is then the Bible should be in the non-fiction section in libraries.
    Linkerman
    This is a close contender to the title of "Most Worthless Pseudo-Article Ever Written For UG". The author is what, 10 years old?
    Sixxstarr
    1) Limp Bizkit is Rap-Metal...more so Rap with occasionally screaming and heavy guitars... 2)Chocolate Starfish and the Hotdog Flavored Water isn't the greatest but Boiler is a ****ing awesome song...Rollin was also good...the rest of it...not so much.. 3)Lostprophets is not metal at all...wtf is your definition of metal?
    INSULIN
    do what I do listen to parents records before all this computer made perfect music tired of all down tuned played on a e and a string and 7 and 8 string guitars ha ha my 3 year old son plays drums to beatles records ha ah
    The_Dayman
    Or...You know...Listen to good music regardless of when it was recorded... My god, people still think the only music being recorded today is on the radio? You "the only good music was from X generation" people aren't helping...
    Nerdpunx
    SoLA is really good piece of music in my opinion. But why in the hell Lulu and Limp Bizofshit are listed? They are not metal. :I
    Andrew32459
    "Lulu" should be the at the first rank, and "St.Anger" supposed to get the second one. And there should be one for Maiden's "Virtual XI"
    JuteJute
    I think Saints of LA is Mötleys third best album lol and i would definetly recommend it to someone who wants to get started.
    irs8686
    I think Saints of Los Angeles is a great album. Better than Girls, Girls, Girls...